Are your teens glued to their phones?
They could be out with the family, at the dinner table, or trying to work on a school project — and you’ve noticed they’re almost always on their phones.
It’s not surprising that teenagers enjoy using their phones.
After all, most mobile apps are designed to keep users hooked for as long as possible.
Research suggests that teens use their phones for an average of four hours a day. Researchers have also found that a quarter of teens’ daily mobile phone usage exceeds five hours.
You might be worried that your teens are spending too much time on their devices. So it can be helpful to understand what smartphone addiction looks like.
In this article, I’ll share common symptoms of phone addiction in teens. I’ll also discuss how you can help your teens manage their phone usage and make the best use of their time.
(If it’s hard to get your teens to listen to you, make sure to download the free quick action guide below.)
FREE QUICK ACTION GUIDE:
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10 Proven Ways to Get Your Teenager to Listen to You.
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Why parents blame everything on phones
Smartphones are often blamed when things go wrong in a teen’s life, like when a teen isn’t sleeping enough or isn’t doing well in school.
It’s tempting to make technology the scapegoat. It is true that social media apps and other apps are designed to keep people using them for long periods of time.
But the real issue isn’t the phones. It often boils down to deeper underlying problems like loneliness, anxiety, or a lack of autonomy.
So even if you take away your teens’ phones, they might turn to other things like video games or TV as a substitute. Or they might throw tantrums to try to get what they want.
At other times, phones are blamed for something completely unrelated, like falling sick.
It could also be possible that your teenager doesn’t actually have a phone addiction.
So it’s important to first assess whether your teen’s phone usage and the accompanying symptoms constitute an actual addiction.
What are the signs of teenage phone addiction?
According to the research, smartphone addiction is characterized by a long-term reliance on phones. Essentially, the person struggles to control their actions, leading to obsessive behavior.
The signs of phone addiction include the following:
Sign #1: Excessive phone usage
This is an obvious one. You might continually see your teens on their phones. They’re constantly checking their devices, even when they don’t receive any notifications or alerts.
In addition, it always seems urgent for them to get back on their phones, whether it’s to reply to a text or stay connected with their friends through social media.
They might frequently stop whatever activity they’re doing to check their phone.
Sign #2: Neglecting their responsibilities
Your teens put off their responsibilities and commitments to spend more time on their phones.
They don’t help with chores or to run errands, and they don’t participate actively in clubs or school activities.
Apart from that, they might not be taking responsibility for their physical health or personal hygiene.
For example, they might lack sleep and exercise, and might be too engrossed in screen time to eat proper meals.
Sign #3: Declining academic performance
Your teens struggle to complete their homework and submit projects on time.
They’re distracted by their phones and don’t study hard for tests and exams. This leads to them getting worse grades in school.
Sign #4: Withdrawal symptoms
When your teens aren’t able to use their phones, they might experience withdrawal symptoms.
These symptoms include:
- Feeling uneasy or uncomfortable
- Becoming irritable or angry
- Becoming anxious or withdrawn
- Throwing tantrums or becoming violent
These symptoms indicate that your teens are becoming too dependent on their smartphones.
Sign #5: Loss of interest in hobbies
You might notice that your teenagers no longer enjoy activities they used to love. Instead, they seem to only find pleasure in using their devices.
That’s because their brains release a small amount of dopamine each time they’re on their phones.
This neurotransmitter in the brain is responsible for things related to motivation and a feeling of satisfaction.
The more teens use their phones, the more dependent they become on screen time to give them a boost of dopamine.
Sign #6: Decreased social interactions
Your teens prefer being on their devices rather than socializing with friends and family. They’re reluctant to participate in family activities or hang out with friends.
Your teens don’t interact much with others, even when they’re at a social event. They’re too focused on using their devices, which can lead to social isolation in the long run.
Sign #7: Secretive or risky behaviors
You’ve noticed your teens sneaking around or lying about their mobile phone usage. They may become defensive when you ask or confront them about how much time they’ve been spending on their devices.
What’s more, your teenagers may engage in risky behaviors. For example, they may text or play mobile games while crossing the road.
How to stop teenage phone addiction
Taking away your teen’s phone might seem like the best solution. This might work in the short term, but it’s not a long-term fix.
Let’s explore some better ways to help your teens regain control over their phone usage. These approaches are more likely to enable them to curb their phone addiction in the long run.
Keep in mind that these are just recommendations. If your teen’s phone addiction symptoms concern you, it’s best to seek professional help.
Tip #1: Set clear boundaries
Without proper boundaries and consequences, it’s easy for teenagers to go overboard with their phone usage.
Find a time to sit down with your teenagers and discuss important house rules.
You can work together with them to decide on what boundaries to set. For instance, you might decide that no phones will be allowed at the dinner table.
Then, discuss the consequences of violating these rules. The consequences should be directly related to the misbehavior.
For example, if your teens aren’t able to focus when they’re doing homework because of their phones, the logical consequence might be that they need to put their phones in your room when they’re doing homework.
Tip #2: Create phone-free zones
You can discuss and establish phone-free times and places.
One example is making the bedrooms or dining table a phone-free zone. Placing signs that say something like “phone-free zone” can also be a good reminder for all family members.
You can also set up phone-free times for the family. You can get the family to put all devices away during dinner time, family gatherings, and an hour before bed.
This creates dedicated family time and sets an example for your teens by showing them that you’re also willing to put your phone away at specific times.
Tip #3: Lead by example
Modeling healthy habits and boundaries is a great way to teach your teens how to manage their device usage.
If you use your own phone too much, your teenagers will naturally think it’s hypocritical of you to tell them to use their phones less.
So, as far as possible, make it a habit to follow the family boundaries set for device usage.
Practice good habits, such as putting your phone away when you’re doing work or when you’re having a face-to-face conversation with someone.
You can also start replacing screen time with other activities, like reading, exercise, or family board game night.
Most importantly, make it a priority to spend quality time together as a family. This helps to build stronger family bonds and also reduces loneliness in your teens, which lowers your teens’ risk of phone addiction.
Tip #4: Encourage your teen to engage in other activities
Here are several things you can try to encourage your teens to participate in other activities:
- Plan family activities, such as visiting the beach, hiking, or having a barbecue
- Take part in meaningful activities together with your teens, like volunteering at a soup kitchen or animal shelter
- Offer to give your teens a lift if they want to go somewhere
- Practice self-care habits together with your teens, such as exercising or preparing healthy meals
Tip #5: Help your teen develop a sense of purpose
Many teens who struggle with a phone addiction don’t have a strong sense of purpose. These teens frequently fill their emotional void with screen time.
The key to breaking this cycle is to help your teens discover meaning and purpose in their lives.
There are many ways for your teens to find fulfillment and purpose. As they do these things, they’ll be more intentional about how they spend their time.
Many teens enjoy giving back to society and helping those in need. Others find satisfaction in building apps or devices that benefit others.
Start by having short conversations with your teens. Ask them what makes them happy or what they like best about themselves. These questions will help them reflect on their strengths and interests.
You can also share your own experiences and journey as part of these conversations.
Talk about meaningful events that have occurred in your life. For example, you could share more about a time you overcame a challenge or learned a life lesson because of a mistake you made.
Try to find opportunities for your teens to discover what’s meaningful to them. For instance, you can volunteer together or encourage your teens to learn a new skill.
These small steps can enable your teens to develop a deeper sense of purpose, so screen time won’t be as appealing to them.
Tip #6: Seek professional help
In some cases, phone addiction can lead to serious consequences.
If your teen is losing weight, isn’t eating or sleeping well, often seems down, or is becoming socially isolated…
… it’s time to seek professional help.
A professional like a coach can equip your teen with the right mindset and strategies to overcome this addiction.
Seeking help doesn’t mean you’ve failed as a parent. In fact, it takes courage to get your teens the help they need.
And it’s a fact of life that we all need external support and guidance sometimes.
Conclusion
If your teen has a phone addiction, try to get to the root of the problem.
Does your teen frequently feel anxious or lonely?
Does your teen lack meaningful goals and a sense of purpose?
What other underlying issues might be causing screen time to be so attractive to your teen as a form of temporary escape?
As you understand the situation at a deeper level and apply the tips outlined in this article, I’m confident that your teen will be able to overcome his or her phone addiction!
(If you haven’t already done so, download your free quick action guide below.)
FREE QUICK ACTION GUIDE:
Get your FREE copy of
10 Proven Ways to Get Your Teenager to Listen to You.
The tips are guaranteed to help you get through to your teen, so download your copy today!
Angela says
Very interesting and useful article. It has useful tips not only for teens but for us adults, too.
Daniel Wong says
Thank you.
A.D. says
Thank you. This was very helpful. I appreciate the tips.
Daniel Wong says
You’re welcome.