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40 Things Children Should Know How to Do Before They Turn 13

Updated on April 15, 2024 By Daniel Wong 27 Comments

Happy pre-teens and teens

As a parent, do you sometimes do things for your children that they should do for themselves?

I’m a parent too, so I know this is a trap that’s easy to fall into.

As time goes by, you may even start to think that you need to keep doing these things for your children.

If you don’t, these things won’t get done at all!

Sound familiar?

I’ve spoken to and worked with close to 25,000 pre-teens and teens so far. It surprises me that most of them haven’t developed the life skills needed to succeed in school and adulthood.

To help parents, I’ve created this list of 40 things that children should know how to do before they turn 13.

(To gain access to 10 more items, download the free bonus below.)

I’ve separated the list into five categories:

  • General life skills and self-management
  • Social/communication skills and relationships
  • Money
  • Home
  • Emotions

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Enter your email below to download a PDF summary of this article. The PDF contains all the items found here, plus 10 exclusive bonus items that you’ll only find in the PDF.

General life skills and self-management

1. Use a calendar or planner to keep track of important events and dates.

2. Handle their schoolwork, revision, etc. on their own without reminders or nagging.

3. Wake up on their own every morning without relying on their parents.

4. Writing things down and setting reminders to ensure that they don’t forget important information, items, etc.

5. Keep their room, desk, personal belongings, etc. organised.

6. Contact their tutors, teachers, coaches, etc. when necessary instead of relying on their parents to do it on their behalf.

7. Develop a rough daily and weekly schedule.

8. Create a plan to prepare for a test, achieve a goal, complete a project, etc.

9. Prioritise tasks.

10. Pack their bag on their own.

11. Take public transportation.

Social/communication skills and relationships

12. Carry on a conversation with someone they just met.

13. Ask appropriate and relevant questions.

14. Order food at a food court, fast food restaurant, etc.

15. Display basic courtesies.

16. Offer a sincere apology when they have made a mistake.

17. Keep the commitments and promises they have made to others.

Money

18. Create a simple budget.

19. Save for things they want in the medium- or long-term.

20. Set aside some of their allowance for charitable giving.

21. Know the rough price of common items.

22. Compare prices before making bigger purchases so that they don’t waste money unnecessarily.

Home

23. Buy groceries.

24. Operate kitchen appliances, e.g. toaster, microwave.

25. Prepare a simple meal, e.g. cook noodles and eggs, make a salad.

26. Use the washing machine.

27. Iron clothes.

28. Fold clothes.

29. Vacuum and sweep the floor.

30. Mop the floor.

31. Clean the bathroom.

32. Wash the dishes.

33. Clear the garbage.

Emotions

34. Manage emotions like anger, anxiety and fear in healthy ways. (Here’s an article about how to help anxious teenagers.)

35. Deal with failures and disappointments constructively.

36. Take full responsibility for their life and not blame others.

37. Cope with stress effectively.

38. Accept criticism with grace.

39. Forgive themselves and others.

40. Reframe frustrating situations so that they see the situations more positively.

Like this article? Please share it with your friends.

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Enter your email below to download a PDF summary of this article. The PDF contains all the items found here, plus 10 exclusive bonus items that you’ll only find in the PDF.

Filed Under: Children, Parenting, Teens

Comments

  1. Ms. Jeevani Saranga says

    June 8, 2018 at 4:53 am

    Thank you so much all the ideas.

    Reply
    • Daniel Wong says

      June 8, 2018 at 9:17 am

      You’re most welcome.

      Reply
  2. Scarlett says

    June 8, 2018 at 10:14 am

    Hahaha! I am a teen and I still need to work on this and I will!
    Oh and thanks for the article.

    Reply
    • Daniel Wong says

      June 8, 2018 at 10:19 am

      You’re welcome, Scarlett. Wishing you all the best!

      Reply
  3. Ravi V says

    June 13, 2018 at 1:31 pm

    Hi Daniel, it was so blessing and I took some printout and gave it to my Sunday School Teachers to discuss with their children in the class with these points.
    it was so great and helpful

    Ravi- India

    Reply
    • Daniel Wong says

      June 13, 2018 at 1:44 pm

      I’m glad to hear that, Ravi!

      Reply
  4. June says

    June 13, 2018 at 4:59 pm

    thanks!

    Reply
    • Daniel Wong says

      June 13, 2018 at 5:21 pm

      You’re welcome, June.

      Reply
  5. Rose says

    June 13, 2018 at 10:07 pm

    thanks so much Daniel…this will help me alot

    Reply
    • Daniel Wong says

      June 13, 2018 at 10:35 pm

      You are very welcome, Rose.

      Reply
  6. Priya boro says

    June 13, 2018 at 10:12 pm

    Sir I’m very lazy, therefore can you kindly tell me how to deal with it… My parents are fed up of being saying, don’t be so lazy

    Reply
    • Daniel Wong says

      June 13, 2018 at 10:36 pm

      Thank you for sharing. I think you’ll find this article (https://www.daniel-wong.com/2018/04/23/get-motivated-to-study/) useful.

      Reply
  7. KELLYN says

    June 29, 2018 at 8:41 am

    Great ideas all parents should know but don’t. But could I just add on one under either social or emotions category- how to handle bullies positively without losing one self-worth.

    Reply
    • Daniel Wong says

      June 29, 2018 at 9:22 am

      Thanks, Kellyn. Great point.

      Reply
    • Melanie Chaplin says

      September 1, 2020 at 11:25 pm

      Absolutely!

      Reply
  8. ESAKKI MUTHU [EM] says

    July 1, 2018 at 7:25 pm

    I am Esakki Muthu [EM]
    Thank you sir!
    It’s very useful tips!

    Reply
    • Daniel Wong says

      July 2, 2018 at 9:58 am

      You are very welcome, Esakki Muthu.

      Reply
  9. Saheed Soneye says

    October 23, 2018 at 2:25 pm

    Very nice and concise article. It was really helpful.

    Reply
  10. Jhoei says

    July 9, 2019 at 7:27 am

    I agree. Most parents pamper their kids that these children never learn the life skills that they need to develop. I’ve seen these among my students and it saddens me to know that at the age of 17 and 18, there are students who can’t survive on their own. I usually talk to their parents about this to help their kids grow and mature. As a mother to my two kids, I make sure that they do things on their own as early as 4 years old. I even ask them to decide and just correct their decisions when needed.

    Reply
  11. Jaiden says

    April 15, 2020 at 12:22 am

    i’m 12, and i don’t do have the stuff but i will now thank you

    Reply
  12. Elby says

    February 15, 2021 at 7:06 pm

    Hi, I’m Elby and I do most of the stuff but need to work on some of it. I am 11 turning 12 in march. Thx for the great tips.

    Reply
  13. Daniel says

    December 11, 2021 at 11:39 pm

    Hey i Turned 13 on the 2nd And i already do most of the basic things like cooking, organizing and projects but dont deal well with talking to people and dealing with my anxiety i will try to work on these things Thx

    Btw, My names Daniel too

    I also hope to become a quantum phycist

    Reply
  14. Anonymouschild says

    May 5, 2023 at 10:01 am

    Nice list. I found this at 13 (my current age) and it seems pretty useful, but as a logical thinker I would like to add to this/argue it
    1.Some people are more shy than others, alike myself
    2.Not every single person*child* is able to do the things in a day that others can
    3. Another one for money management is if you as a teen/preteen absolutely love spending money split how much you have: half for saving and half for spending 💰

    Reply
  15. Grace says

    January 6, 2024 at 8:11 am

    This is helpful to me but no one to help I pray God see me through

    Reply
  16. Grace says

    January 6, 2024 at 8:14 am

    This is helpful to me but am so shy to tell my dad that and parents won’t know

    Reply
  17. rather not say says

    November 11, 2024 at 10:02 am

    This helped me a lot, I have tons to work on with my family and this was truly helpful, thank you!
    Hope others can use this too.

    Reply
  18. Katie says

    January 27, 2025 at 2:43 am

    I am not a parent, I am a child, and I think I will start to abide by these tips. I have turned them into a check lists that I look at everyday! I love it! thank you so much you have helped me become responsible!

    Reply

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