How to Choose the Right Coach for Your Teen

Updated on January 19, 2023 By Daniel Wong Leave a Comment

Teenagers need guidance to navigate the challenges of adolescence.

But as a parent, you’ve probably noticed that your teen often rejects your guidance.

The more you tell your teen what choices he or she ought to make, the less likely your teen is to listen.

So what should you do?

Connect your teen with an experienced coach. A skilled coach and mentor can transform unmotivated teens into motivated and responsible young adults.

These positive changes can ease the tension in your relationship with your teen. For many parents, this is the biggest benefit of finding the right coach.

How should you choose the right coach for your teen?

Every teen has unique challenges to overcome and opportunities to make the most of. So it’s important to look for a coach who has the right combination of skills and experience to meet your teen’s needs.

Here’s what to do first…

Identify the goals to be achieved through coaching

When a coach works with teens, the focus isn’t usually just on academics. If school performance is a concern you have about your teen, a holistic approach is most effective.

A coach can work with your teen to develop the intrinsic motivation needed to do well in school. A coach will also help your teen to develop the mindset and practical skills necessary to thrive.

This process involves many aspects of development for your teen. So it helps to start your search for a coach by listing the main concerns you have about your teenager.

Think about the outcomes you want to achieve through the coaching sessions. Ask yourself questions like:

Why am I looking for a coach for my teen?
What do I want my teen to learn through the coaching sessions?
Which areas does my teen need the most guidance in?

Below are some common areas for improvement that I help my teenage coaching clients to make progress in:

Common area for improvement #1: Motivation

A lack of intrinsic motivation is a common but serious problem that many teenagers struggle with.

A coach can help teenagers to find the inner drive to learn and improve. As a result, these teenagers will be able to reach their full potential in school and life.

Common area for improvement #2: Responsibility

Do you think your teen sometimes behaves irresponsibly?

If so, you’re not alone.

Teenagers need to learn to make wise decisions, but the desire to do so has to come from within. A coach can help teens shift towards more responsible and mature behavior.

Common area for improvement #3: Sense of purpose

Many teenagers coast through life without a strong sense of purpose.

A lack of direction can lead to frustration for both teens and their parents. It’s difficult for many teens to understand how to make meaningful choices and lead a meaningful life.

At a time when they’re making important decisions about the future, a sense of purpose can guide your teen in the right direction.

A coach can help your teen to cultivate passion and live a life that’s founded on the right values.

Common area for improvement #4: Attitude and mindset

We all know how important it is to develop mental strength. But many teens lack the fortitude to overcome challenges and setbacks.

Coaching can enable teens to become more process-oriented and resilient. Instead of focusing too much on grades or achievement, they’ll learn to find joy in the process of attaining mastery.

As such, they’ll develop a more positive attitude toward school and other areas of life.

Common area for improvement #5: Respect

Respect for authority figures – especially parents – can be dramatically improved through coaching.

You’re probably already aware that teenagers’ disrespectful behavior can damage relationships and cause frustration for everyone involved.

The right coach can help your teen to understand the importance of respect, such that your teen will change his or her behavior for the better.

Common area for improvement #6: Time management

Coaching will equip your teenager with the skills needed to manage his or her time effectively.

Your teen will learn how to reduce procrastination and overcome distractions. Your teen will also learn how to stay organized and prioritize well.

These time management skills will benefit your teenager both in the short term and the long term!

Common area for improvement #7: Study skills

As a parent, you know it can sometimes be hard to get a teen to study.

Some teens lack the motivation to study, while others need more practical support. Coaching addresses both of these issues.

If your teenager doesn’t know how to study effectively, ensure that the coach you engage is able to teach study skills.

Here’s what to look for in a coach…

The right coach is uniquely qualified to guide teens to become motivated, confident, and responsible. The right coach empowers teens to thrive and to maximize their potential.

So what factors should you consider when looking for a coach for your teen?

1. Experience and background

Look for a coach who specializes in working with teens. Choose a coach who has experience working with teens who face similar problems as your teen.

2. Expertise

Take a look at the articles and books the coach has written, the videos the coach has published, the interviews the coach has done, the talks the coach has given, etc. These should demonstrate the coach’s knowledge and expertise.

3. Professional development

You’re looking to engage someone who will inspire your teen to grow and develop. So the coach you choose should be an example of someone who embraces lifelong learning. Coaches who continually strive to improve themselves are in the best position to mentor your teenager.

4. Proven results

Read the testimonials and success stories of the coach’s previous clients to see if the coach has a proven track record.

Questions to ask a potential coach

If you’ve found a coach for your teen who seems suitable, here are some questions to ask:

Question #1: What coaching methodology do you use?

Find out how the coach plans to guide your teen toward making positive changes.

What approaches or techniques does the coach use? What is his or her coaching philosophy? What makes his or her approach effective?

Question #2: Do you offer a trial session?

A trial session is a great way to see how well your teen and the coach get along. The better the connection, the more likely it is that your teen will benefit from the coaching sessions.

Question #3: What’s your availability like?

Given your teen’s schedule and commitments, does the coach have available slots to work with your teen? Can the coach start the sessions right away, or is there a waiting list?

Question #4: What’s the structure of the coaching sessions?

Here are some related questions:

What’s the recommended frequency of the coaching sessions?
How long is each session?
Will you provide periodic updates to the parents?
Do I pay for the sessions one at a time, or do you offer some kind of package?
What’s your refund policy?

Conclusion

No matter what challenges your teen is currently facing, I hope you’re now convinced that he or she would benefit from coaching.

And after reading this article, I hope you also know how to choose the right coach for your teen.

Over the past decade, I’ve spent thousands and thousands of hours coaching teens 1-to-1. It brings me incredible joy to see my teenage coaching clients become motivated, confident, resilient, purpose-driven, and responsible!

To find out more about the 1-to-1 coaching program I offer for teens, visit this page. Or you can also click the link in the box below…

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1-to-1 Coaching Program for Teens (With Daniel Wong)

Unmotivated Teenagers: What’s Really Going On? (And How Parents Can Help)

Updated on January 19, 2023 By Daniel Wong 2 Comments

Are you concerned that your teen isn’t making the most of his or her potential?

Or do you worry that your teen lacks focus and drive?

Unmotivated teenagers cause their parents plenty of stress and frustration!

During adolescence, teens often deal with challenges like peer pressure, bullying, school-related stress, etc. These issues can affect teens’ motivation by causing them to feel overwhelmed or lost.

Parenting teens is hard, and you’re not alone if you feel like you’ve tried everything to motivate your teenager.

This article explores the possible explanations for what’s going on with unmotivated teenagers. We’ll also explore what you – as a parent – can do to help.

Of course, there are times when unmotivated teens will need professional support. This is something that we’ll discuss toward the end of the article.

Let me start by asking this question…

Why does your teenager lack motivation?

It’s essential to understand what your teens are going through before concluding that they’re “unmotivated.”

Perhaps you even wonder if you are doing enough to keep your teenagers motivated.

So let’s take a closer look at these 8 common reasons for teens’ lack of motivation.

Reason #1: Your teen feels discouraged or overwhelmed

Growing up and developing into a young adult is a journey that has many ups and downs. Teenagers frequently feel overwhelmed, both in school and in their personal lives.

When it comes to school, the workload alone can feel daunting. Whether they’re struggling to focus in class or are unable to keep up with the work, your teenagers may be feeling distressed.

As teens get older, the material they learn in school gets significantly harder. At the same time, they become busier with extracurricular activities and their social life.

As such, most teens struggle to lead balanced lives.

Over time, self-doubt can arise in teenagers. On the outside, this may look like a lack of motivation, when the underlying emotion is actually discouragement.

Here’s where you can guide your teenagers toward understanding the power of focus and time management. Talk to them about which activities they could focus on and which to scale back on.

Of course, you should make it clear that you’re there to support your teens, but that they are fully responsible for their choices.

Reason #2: Your teen isn’t taking care of his or her physical health

Teenagers crave independence and want to make their own choices. Teens want to exercise their decision-making abilities in many areas, including their food choices, the physical activities they participate in, and when they go to bed.

Teens who consume sugary drinks and unhealthy snacks will have poor energy levels. The same thing will happen if they don’t exercise regularly.

Research shows that sedentary behavior can lead to anxiety, depression, poor mental capacity, loss of concentration, and even a decline in memory. Being sleep-deprived – which most teens are – doesn’t help the situation!

Considering the factors above, you can see why your teen might lack enthusiasm or seem listless. Proper diet, exercise, and sleep are essential elements for students who are motivated to give their best.

To help your teens lead a healthy lifestyle, you can try organizing family outings that involve hiking or biking. Even going for a walk as a family once or twice a week is a good start.

You can also plan healthy dinners. Remove junk food from your home and keep healthy snacks on hand.

And it’s vital that you lead by example in taking care of your own physical health!

Reason #3: Your teen feels like he or she is being micromanaged

Nobody likes to be micromanaged.

Statistics show that 59% of adults have experienced being micromanaged at some point in their working life. Of those who reported working for a micromanager, 68% said it had decreased their morale, and 55% claimed it had hurt their productivity.

Your teens aren’t your employees, but you may be treating them like they are.

Teens crave independence and being trusted to make their own decisions.

So if you talk down to your teens, it can result in rebellious behavior. They may start to act out and defy your instructions.

Be mindful not to control every aspect of your teenagers’ lives. If safety isn’t an issue, allow them to make their own choices as far as possible. Some relevant areas would be clothes, food, choice of friends, and when they do their homework.

The more control you exert, the more likely they’ll be unmotivated teenagers.

Instead, include your teens in the decision-making process as much as possible. This would be applicable when it comes to establishing rules and boundaries.

By doing this, your teenagers will be more likely to comply with those rules. This means that you won’t be forced to micromanage them, so it’s a win-win situation!

Reason #4: Your teen doesn’t see the purpose of what he or she is being asked to do

How often have you asked your teens to complete some chores or to stop using their phone so much?

And how often have your teens ignored your requests?

Teenagers won’t want to do these things if they don’t understand or agree with the reasons you give them.

You may think you’re dealing with unmotivated teenagers. But maybe they just don’t see why they need to do the chores now instead of later, or why they should stop using their phone when they’ve already completed their homework.

Focus on the intrinsic value of what you’re asking your teens to do, e.g. contributing to the family, becoming a more disciplined person, developing traits like commitment and perseverance.

Of course, it’s important that you periodically talk to your teens about what values matter to them. It’s also important that you appreciate your teens sincerely when they fulfill their responsibilities.

When your teens focus on the intrinsic value of what they’re doing – not just on the practical benefits they’ll receive – they’ll develop a sense of purpose. They’ll also find the inner motivation to do the things that matter.

Reason #5: Your teen doesn’t know how to prioritize

The concept of organization doesn’t just apply to items your teens own. It also refers to how your teens prioritize their tasks.

Prioritizing allows your teens to sort through everything on their agenda and decide how best to complete those tasks.

Teens who haven’t learned how to prioritize often feel like they don’t know where to start. They end up getting distracted instead, which causes them to seem unmotivated.

If your teens know how to create lists and keep track of events and deadlines, they’ll be less stressed. They’ll procrastinate less, and they’ll stay on top of their tasks.

According to research, people who finish their most difficult tasks first are more productive than people who start with their easy tasks.

Reason #6: Your teen feels forced into doing things

No one likes to feel pressured into doing things they don’t want to do – teenagers especially.

So don’t spend too much time trying to force your teen to behave in a certain way, or you’ll both end up feeling frustrated.

Many parents use rewards to motivate their teens to perform certain tasks. But if you use this approach frequently, your teens will become outcome-oriented instead of process-oriented.

They’ll start to focus on the benefits they’ll receive if they perform the task, rather than focusing on the intrinsic value of the task. This will result in long-term negative consequences.

What’s more, your teenagers are likely to become more unmotivated over time.

So what should you do instead?

Try having a problem-solving conversation with your teens. Understanding their perspective will help you learn what support they need. You’ll also learn how you can be a better parent to them.

Make sure to use active listening techniques when speaking with your teenagers, e.g. maintaining eye contact, paying attention to body language, asking clarifying questions. Your teens will be more willing to share how they feel if they know you’re really listening to them.

Reason #7: Your teen has a learning disability

Learning disabilities can hinder a teen’s ability to comprehend or retain information.

Simple equations may be challenging to remember, or basic grammar rules may cause confusion.

Here are a few common learning disabilities:

Dyslexia. This is a learning disorder in which people find it hard to read. This is because of problems identifying sounds of speech and how they relate to letters.
Dyscalculia. This is a learning disorder that causes people to have trouble learning math. These difficulties can include problems doing both basic and abstract math.
Dysgraphia. This neurological condition makes it difficult for people to turn their thoughts into written words. This can also affect handwriting and writing speed.

A related condition is attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). This is a neurodevelopmental disorder that leads to poor planning and time management, impulsiveness, a lack of concentration, disorganization, etc.

Reason #8: Your teen doesn’t have a mentor or coach

A mentor or coach is the little-known factor that enables teenagers to become successful and happy.

It’s hard for parents to mentor their teens. This is because teens often interpret parental advice as nagging or lecturing.

Having a mentor benefits teenagers as they navigate their educational and life journeys. Research even shows that teenagers with mentors experience higher levels of life satisfaction.

Finding someone to fill this role can be challenging because it’s rare to have a family friend or relative who can serve as a mentor. Few adults can fully understand your teen’s challenges and guide your teen effectively.

This is where a more formal arrangement – like engaging a coach – can help.

Professionals who can help your unmotivated teen

If your teenager lacks motivation or faces other related challenges, you might be considering engaging a professional to help him or her.

Professional support comes in many forms, each serving a different purpose.

Here are the professionals who may be able to help your teen, depending on what issues your teen is dealing with:

1. Therapist or counselor

Main objective: To help teens work through trauma or emotional distress.

A therapist or counselor can help teens work through emotions related to trauma, physical abuse, or other situations causing ongoing emotional distress.

2. Psychologist or psychiatrist

Main objective: To treat teens who have mental disorders and mental illnesses.

A psychologist can help teens who have emotional problems and provide treatment for mental health-related issues. This often involves some kind of behavioral therapy like cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) or dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT).

A psychiatrist is a medical doctor who treats mental illnesses. Psychiatrists frequently prescribe medications that they think may help the patient’s condition.

3. Tutor

Main objective: To help focused and driven teens improve in specific academic areas.

Engaging a tutor is a good option for teens who are already motivated and focused, but who just need some additional assistance in a specific subject.

4. Coach

Main objective: To equip teens with the mindset and tools needed to become motivated, focused, confident, resilient, and responsible.

Engaging a coach is a solution that many parents haven’t considered.

Coaches specialize in guiding teens who are going through a difficult time, who have a learning disability, who lack motivation, or who are struggling to overcome various challenges.

Coaches help teens to become more resilient, understand the importance of education, overcome a negative mindset, develop planning and organizational skills, etc.

So if your teens don’t have a strong sense of purpose, give up easily, frequently get distracted, or lack self-confidence and a sense of responsibility – then connecting them with a coach will benefit them tremendously.

A coach might be just what your teen needs!

To learn more about how your teen might benefit from coaching, read this article next. Or you can also click the link in the box below…

READ THIS ARTICLE NEXT:

Coaching for Teens: Can It Help My Teen to Become Motivated?

Top Students Who Sleep 8 Hours a Night Use These 10 Principles

Updated on September 3, 2022 By Daniel Wong 68 Comments

Students who want to be top students are busy.

You’ve got homework to do, projects to complete, extra classes to attend, and responsibilities to fulfill.

It’s not easy to lead a balanced life and get excellent grades, too. No wonder you’re sleep-deprived!

Want to hear some good news?

It doesn’t have to be this way.

You can become a top student and sleep eight hours a night. I know because I was that student.

I’ve since completed my formal education. But, if you’re curious, here are some of my academic achievements:

I got 9 A1s for the GCE O-Levels.
I got 4 As and 2 “Special” Paper distinctions for the GCE A-Levels.
I received a full academic scholarship to study at Duke University in the USA.
I did a double major at Duke and graduated summa cum laude (First Class Honours). My GPA was 3.98/4.0.
I was inducted into three academic honour societies at Duke.

I don’t say all of this to brag — and I certainly don’t think these achievements make me a super-impressive person.

Neither do I believe the main aim of education is to become a top student.

However, by becoming a better student, you’ll learn to become more organised, focused, disciplined, and meticulous — valuable skills and qualities for lifelong success.

If you continually feel overwhelmed, you’re probably sleep-deprived, spending too much time on urgent tasks. Top students know this, so they focus on getting assignments done before they become urgent.

Apply the 10 principles outlined in this article, and I guarantee that you’ll study more effectively, feel less stressed, and have more time for the things you love outside of school — including sleep.

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12 Guaranteed Ways for Students to Improve Focus & Reduce Procrastination

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30 Tips to Stop Procrastinating and Find Motivation to Do Homework

Updated on January 24, 2023 By Daniel Wong 41 Comments

To stop procrastinating on homework, you need to find motivation to do the homework in the first place.

But first, you have to overcome feeling too overwhelmed to even start.

You know what it feels like when everything hits you at once, right?

You have three tests to study for and a math assignment due tomorrow.

And you’ve got a history report due the day after.

You tell yourself to get down to work. But with so much to do, you feel overwhelmed.

So you procrastinate.

You check your social media feed, watch a few videos, and get yourself a drink. But you know that none of this is bringing you closer to getting the work done.

Does this sound familiar?

Don’t worry – you are not alone. Procrastination is a problem that everyone faces, but there are ways around it.

By following the tips in this article, you’ll be able to overcome procrastination and consistently find the motivation to do the homework.

So read on to discover 30 powerful tips to help you stop procrastinating on your homework.

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Enter your email below to download a PDF summary of this article. The PDF contains all the tips found here, plus 3 exclusive bonus tips that you’ll only find in the PDF.

How to stop procrastinating and motivate yourself to do your homework

Procrastination when it comes to homework isn’t just an issue of laziness or a lack of motivation.

The following tips will help you to first address the root cause of your procrastination and then implement strategies to keep your motivation levels high.

1. Take a quiz to see how much you procrastinate.

The first step to changing your behavior is to become more self-aware.

How often do you procrastinate? What kinds of tasks do you tend to put off? Is procrastination a small or big problem for you?

To answer these questions, I suggest that you take this online quiz designed by Psychology Today.

2. Figure out why you’re procrastinating.

Procrastination is a complex issue that involves multiple factors.

Stop thinking of excuses for not doing your homework, and figure out what’s keeping you from getting started.

Are you procrastinating because:

You’re not sure you’ll be able to solve all the homework problems?
You’re subconsciously rebelling against your teachers or parents?
You’re not interested in the subject or topic?
You’re physically or mentally tired?
You’re waiting for the perfect time to start?
You don’t know where to start?

Once you’ve identified exactly why you’re procrastinating, you can pick out the tips in this article that will get to the root of the problem.

3. Write down what you’re procrastinating on.

Students tend to procrastinate when they’re feeling stressed and overwhelmed.

But you might be surprised to discover that simply by writing down the specific tasks you’re putting off, the situation will feel more manageable.

It’s a quick solution, and it makes a real difference.

Give it a try and you’ll be less likely to procrastinate.

4. Put your homework on your desk.

Here’s an even simpler idea.

Many times, the hardest part of getting your homework done is getting started.

It doesn’t require a lot of willpower to take out your homework and put it on your desk.

But once it’s sitting there in front of you, you’ll be much closer to actually getting down to work.

5. Break down the task into smaller steps.

This one trick will make any task seem more manageable.

For example, if you have a history report to write, you could break it down into the following steps:

Read the history textbook
Do online research
Organize the information
Create an outline
Write the introduction
Write the body paragraphs
Write the conclusion
Edit and proofread the report

Focus on just one step at a time. This way, you won’t need to motivate yourself to write the whole report at one go.

This is an important technique to use if you want to study smart and get more done.

6. Create a detailed timeline with specific deadlines.

As a follow-up to Point #5, you can further combat procrastination by creating a timeline with specific deadlines.

Using the same example above, I’ve added deadlines to each of the steps:

Jan 30^th: Read the history textbook
Feb 2^nd: Do online research
Feb 3^rd: Organize the information
Feb 5^th: Create an outline
Feb 8^th: Write the introduction
Feb 12^th: Write the body paragraphs
Feb 14^th: Write the conclusion
Feb 16^th: Edit and proofread the report

Assigning specific dates creates a sense of urgency, which makes it more likely that you’ll keep to the deadlines.

7. Spend time with people who are focused and hardworking.

Jim Rohn famously said that you’re the average of the five people you spend the most time with.

If you hang out with people who are motivated and hardworking, you’ll become more like them.

Likewise, if you hang out with people who continually procrastinate, you’ll become more like them too.

Motivation to do homework naturally increases when you surround yourself with the right people.

So choose your friends wisely. Find homework buddies who will influence you positively to become a straight-A student who leads a balanced life.

That doesn’t mean you can’t have any fun! It just means that you and your friends know when it’s time to get down to work and when it’s time to enjoy yourselves.

8. Tell at least two or three people about the tasks you plan to complete.

When you tell others about the tasks you intend to finish, you’ll be more likely to follow through with your plans.

This is called “accountability,” and it kicks in because you want to be seen as someone who keeps your word.

So if you know about this principle, why not use it to your advantage?

You could even ask a friend to be your accountability buddy. At the beginning of each day, you could text each other what you plan to work on that day.

Then at the end of the day, you could check in with each other to see if things went according to plan.

9. Change your environment.

Maybe it’s your environment that’s making you feel sluggish.

When you’re doing your homework, is your super-comfortable bed just two steps away? Or is your distracting computer within easy reach?

If your environment is part of your procrastination problem, then change it.

Sometimes all you need is a simple change of scenery. Bring your work to the dining room table and get it done there. Or head to a nearby café to complete your report.

10. Talk to people who have overcome their procrastination problem.

If you have friends who consistently win the battle with procrastination, learn from their experience.

What was the turning point for them? What tips and strategies do they use? What keeps them motivated?

Find all this out, and then apply the information to your own situation.

11. Decide on a reward to give yourself after you complete your task.

“Planned” rewards are a great way to motivate yourself to do your homework.

The reward doesn’t have to be something huge.

For instance, you might decide that after you finish 10 questions of your math homework, you get to watch your favorite TV show.

Or you might decide that after reading one chapter of your history textbook, you get to spend 10 minutes on Facebook.

By giving yourself a reward, you’ll feel more motivated to get through the task at hand.

12. Decide on a consequence you’ll impose on yourself if you don’t meet the deadline.

It’s important that you decide on what the consequence will be before you start working toward your goal.

As an example, you could tell your younger brother that you’ll give him $1 for every deadline you don’t meet (see Point #6).

Or you could decide that you’ll delete one game from your phone for every late homework submission.

Those consequences would probably be painful enough to help you get down to work, right?

13. Visualize success.

Take 30 seconds and imagine how you’ll feel when you finish your work.

What positive emotions will you experience?

Will you feel a sense of satisfaction from getting all your work done? Do you relish the freedom that comes with having some extra time on your hands when you’ve completed your homework?

This simple exercise of visualizing success may be enough to inspire you to start doing your assignment.

14. Visualize the process it will take to achieve that success.

Even more important than visualizing the outcome is visualizing the process it will take to achieve that outcome.

Research shows that focusing on the process is critical to success. If you’re procrastinating on a task, take a few moments to think about what you’ll need to do to complete it.

Visualize the following:

What resources you’ll need
Who you can turn to for help
How long the task will take
Where you’ll work on the task
The joy you’ll experience as you make progress

This kind of visualization is like practice for your mind.

Once you understand what’s necessary to achieve your goal, you’ll find that it’s much easier to get down to work with real focus. This is key to doing well in school.

15. Write down why you want to complete the task.

You’ll be more motivated when you’re clear about why you want to accomplish something.

To motivate yourself to do your homework, think about all the ways in which it’s a meaningful task.

So take a couple of minutes to write down the reasons. Here are some possible ones:

Learn useful information
Master the topic
Enjoy a sense of accomplishment when you’ve completed the task
Become a more focused student
Learn to embrace challenges
Fulfill your responsibility as a student
Get a good grade on the assignment

16. Write down the negative feelings you’ll have if you don’t complete the task.

If you don’t complete the assignment, you might feel disappointed or discouraged. You might even feel as if you’ve let your parents or your teacher – or even yourself – down.

It isn’t wise to dwell on these negative emotions for too long. But by imagining how you’ll feel if you don’t finish the task, you’ll realize how important it is that you get to work.

17. Do the hardest task first.

Most students will choose to do the easiest task first, rather than the hardest one. But this approach isn’t effective because it leaves the worst for last.

It’s more difficult to find motivation to do homework in less enjoyable subjects.

As Brian Tracy says, “Eat that frog!” By this, he means that you should always get your most difficult task out of the way at the beginning of the day.

If math is your least favorite subject, force yourself to complete your math homework first.

After doing so, you’ll feel a surge of motivation from knowing it’s finished. And you won’t procrastinate on your other homework because it will seem easier in comparison.

(On a separate note, check out these tips on how to get better at math if you’re struggling.)

18. Set a timer when doing your homework.

I recommend that you use a stopwatch for every homework session. (If you prefer, you could also use this online stopwatch or the Tomato Timer.)

Start the timer at the beginning of the session, and work in 30- to 45-minute blocks.

Using a timer creates a sense of urgency, which will help you fight off your urge to procrastinate.

When you know you only have to work for a short session, it will be easier to find motivation to complete your homework.

Tell yourself that you need to work hard until the timer goes off, and then you can take a break. (And then be sure to take that break!)

19. Eliminate distractions.

Here are some suggestions on how you can do this:

Delete all the games and social media apps on your phone
Turn off all notifications on your phone
Mute your group chats
Archive your inactive chats
Turn off your phone, or put it on airplane mode
Put your phone at least 10 feet away from you
Turn off the Internet access on your computer
Use an app like Freedom to restrict your Internet usage
Put any other distractions (like food, magazines and books unrelated to your homework) at the other end of the room
Unplug the TV
Use earplugs if your surroundings are noisy

20. At the start of each day, write down the two to three Most Important Tasks (MITs) you want to accomplish.

This will enable you to prioritize your tasks. As Josh Kaufman explains, a Most Important Task (MIT) is a critical task that will help you to get significant results down the road.

Not all tasks are equally important. That’s why it’s vital that you identify your MITs, so that you can complete those as early in the day as possible.

What do you most need to get done today? That’s an MIT.

Get to work on it, then feel the satisfaction that comes from knowing it’s out of the way.

21. Focus on progress instead of perfection.

Perfectionism can destroy your motivation to do homework and keep you from starting important assignments.

Some students procrastinate because they’re waiting for the perfect time to start.

Others do so because they want to get their homework done perfectly. But they know this isn’t really possible – so they put off even getting started.

What’s the solution?

To focus on progress instead of perfection.

There’s never a perfect time for anything. Nor will you ever be able to complete your homework perfectly. But you can do your best, and that’s enough.

So concentrate on learning and improving, and turn this into a habit that you implement whenever you study.

22. Get organized.

Procrastination is common among students who are disorganized.

When you can’t remember which assignment is due when or which tests you have coming up, you’ll naturally feel confused. You’ll experience school- and test-related stress.

This, in turn, will lead to procrastination.

That’s why it’s crucial that you get organized. Here are some tips for doing this:

Don’t rely on your memory; write everything down
Keep a to-do list
Use a student planner
Use a calendar and take note of important dates like exams, project due dates, school holidays, birthdays, and family events
At the end of each day, plan for the following day
Use one binder or folder for each subject or course
Do weekly filing of your loose papers, notes, and old homework
Throw away all the papers and notes you no longer need

23. Stop saying “I have to” and start saying “I choose to.”

When you say things like “I have to write my essay” or “I have to finish my science assignment,” you’ll probably feel annoyed. You might be tempted to complain about your teachers or your school.

What’s the alternative?

To use the phrase “I choose to.”

The truth is, you don’t “have” to do anything.

You can choose not to write your essay; you’ll just run the risk of failing the class.

You can choose not to do your science assignment; you’ll just need to deal with your angry teacher.

When you say “I choose to do my homework,” you’ll feel empowered. This means you’ll be more motivated to study and to do what you ought to.

24. Clear your desk once a week.

Clutter can be demotivating. It also causes stress, which is often at the root of procrastination.

Hard to believe? Give it a try and see for yourself.

By clearing your desk, you’ll reduce stress and make your workspace more organized.

So set a recurring appointment to organize your workspace once a week for just 10 minutes. You’ll receive huge benefits in the long run!

25. If a task takes two minutes or less to complete, do it now.

This is a principle from David Allen’s bestselling book, Getting Things Done.

You may notice that you tend to procrastinate when many tasks pile up. The way to prevent this from happening is to take care of the small but important tasks as soon as you have time.

Here are some examples of small two-minute tasks that you should do once you have a chance:

Replying to your project group member’s email
Picking up anything on the floor that doesn’t belong there
Asking your parents to sign a consent form
Filing a graded assignment
Making a quick phone call
Writing a checklist
Sending a text to schedule a meeting
Making an online purchase that doesn’t require further research

26. Finish one task before starting on the next.

You aren’t being productive when you switch between working on your literature essay, social studies report, and physics problem set – while also intermittently checking your phone.

Research shows that multitasking is less effective than doing one thing at a time. Multitasking may even damage your brain!

When it comes to overcoming procrastination, it’s better to stick with one task all the way through before starting on the next one.

You’ll get a sense of accomplishment when you finish the first assignment, which will give you a boost of inspiration as you move on to the next one.

27. Build your focus gradually.

You can’t win the battle against procrastination overnight; it takes time. This means that you need to build your focus progressively.

If you can only focus for 10 minutes at once, that’s fine. Start with three sessions of 10 minutes a day. After a week, increase it to three sessions of 15 minutes a day, and so on.

As the weeks go by, you’ll become far more focused than when you first started. And you’ll soon see how great that makes you feel.

28. Before you start work, write down three things you’re thankful for.

Gratitude improves your psychological health and increases your mental strength.

These factors are linked to motivation. The more you practice gratitude, the easier it will be to find motivation to do your homework. As such, it’s less likely that you’ll be a serial procrastinator.

Before you get down to work for the day, write down three things you’re thankful for. These could be simple things like good health, fine weather, or a loving family.

You could even do this in a “gratitude journal,” which you can then look back on whenever you need a shot of fresh appreciation for the good things in your life.

Either way, this short exercise will get you in the right mindset to be productive.

29. Get enough sleep.

For most people, this means getting 7 to 9 hours of sleep every night. And teenagers need 8 to 10 hours of sleep a night to function optimally.

What does sleep have to do with procrastination?

More than you might realize.

It’s almost impossible to feel motivated when you’re tired. And when you’re low on energy, your willpower is depleted too.

That’s why you give in to the temptation of Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube videos more easily when you’re sleep-deprived.

Here are ways to get more sleep, and sleep better too:

Create a bedtime routine
Go to sleep at around the same time every night
Set a daily alarm as a reminder to go to bed
Exercise regularly (but not within a few hours of bedtime)
Make your bedroom as dark as possible
Remove or switch off all electronic devices before bedtime
Avoid caffeine at least six hours before bedtime
Use an eye mask and earplugs

30. Schedule appointments with yourself to complete your homework.

These appointments are specific blocks of time reserved for working on a report, assignment, or project. Scheduling appointments is effective because it makes the task more “official,” so you’re more likely to keep the appointment.

For example, you could schedule appointments such as:

Jan 25^th, 4:00 pm – 5:30 pm: Math assignment
Jan 27^th, 3:00 pm – 4:00 pm: Online research for social studies project
Jan 28^th, 4:30 pm – 5:00 pm: Write introduction for English essay

Transform homework procrastination into homework motivation

Procrastination is a problem we all face.

But given that you’ve read all the way to here, I know you’re committed to overcoming this problem.

And now that you’re armed with these tips, you have all the tools you need to become more disciplined and focused.

By the way, please don’t feel as if you need to implement all the tips at once, because that would be too overwhelming.

Instead, I recommend that you focus on just a couple of tips a week, and make gradual progress. No rush!

Over time, you’ll realize that your habit of procrastination has been replaced by the habit of getting things done.

Now’s the time to get started on that process of transformation. 🙂

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Images: Student and books, Homework, Group of students, Consequences, Why, Writing a list, Organized desk, Gratitude

7 Common Mistakes That Damage Your Parent-Child Relationship

Updated on March 24, 2021 By Daniel Wong 6 Comments

Is there tension in your parent-child relationship?

Or is it hard for you to communicate with your child?

If so, don’t be discouraged.

We all try our best as parents, but things aren’t always smooth sailing.

I’ve spoken to and worked with more than 20,000 tweens and teens. I’ve seen first-hand how easily parent-child relationships can be damaged.

Here are seven ways that parents hurt the relationship with their child – so avoid doing these at all costs.

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1. Tell your child that he isn’t living up to his potential.

Parents sometimes say to their underperforming child:

“You’re not maximizing your potential.”
“You’re intelligent, but you’re not making the most of it.”
“You’re wasting your potential.”
“If you worked harder, you would fulfill your potential.”

Do children feel motivated when they hear things like these? Unfortunately, they don’t.

Children share with me that when they’re told they’re not living up to their potential, they’re uninspired to improve.

Why?

Because they feel as if their parents care more about their performance than who they are as a person. They feel as if their parents would consider them more “complete,” if only they achieved more.

This causes resentment, which hinders them from even wanting to change their behavior.

Instead of focusing on your child’s untapped potential, acknowledge his good behavior. For example, if you observe that he’s been more diligent in his school work (even if it’s just a tiny improvement), acknowledge this change. You could say, “I notice you’ve been more focused recently.”

Or if he’s kind toward his younger sibling, compliment him by saying, “That’s thoughtful of you.”

The more attention you pay to your child’s good behavior, the more that behavior will multiply. Gradually, your parent-child relationship will improve too. [Read more…]

How to Raise a Happy, Successful Child: 25 Tips Backed by Science

Updated on November 19, 2022 By Daniel Wong 50 Comments

Every parent wants to raise children who are happy and successful.

But there’s so much parenting advice out there.

Who should you listen to?

And which advice is reliable?

To answer those questions, I read through dozens of scientific articles and research journals.

I’ve compiled this list of 25 scientific ways to bring up confident and well-adjusted children.

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16 Keys to Motivating Your Teenager.

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many thousands of parents, so don't miss out!

1. Become a happier person yourself.

Emotional problems in parents are linked to emotional problems in their children, as explained in Raising Happiness. Not only that, unhappy people are also less effective parents.

Psychologists Carolyn and Philip Cowan have also found that happy parents are more likely to have happy children.

In one study in The Secrets of Happy Families, children were asked: “If you were granted one wish about your parents, what would it be?”

Their answer?

No, it wasn’t that their parents would spend more time with them. Neither was it that their parents would nag at them less, or give them more freedom.

The children’s wish was that their parents were less stressed and tired.

So what can you do to become a happier person? Here’s an article with many practical suggestions. [Read more…]

How to Study Smart: 20 Scientific Ways to Learn Faster

Updated on December 20, 2022 By Daniel Wong 273 Comments

To improve your grades, you can either spend more time studying, or you can learn to study smart.

168.

That’s how many hours there are in a week.

If you’re a student, you probably feel like this isn’t enough.

After all, you have so many assignments to do, projects to work on, and tests to study for.

Plus, you have other activities and commitments.

And you want to have a social life too.

Wouldn’t it be nice if you could study smarter (not harder), get good grades, and lead a balanced life?

Of course it would. That’s why I wrote this article.

The main aim of education isn’t to get straight A’s. But learning how to learn is a crucial life skill.

So I spent hours scouring scientific articles and research journals to find the best ways to learn more effectively.

I’m a lifelong top student myself, and I’ve since completed my formal education. Over the course of my academic career, I’ve used almost all the smart studying tips outlined in this article, so I can verify that they work.

Let’s get started. Here are 20 scientific ways to learn faster.

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How to study smarter and more efficiently

Studying smart essentially means learning how to learn.

This includes how to learn faster and more efficiently, while retaining information for longer.

1. Learn the same information in a variety of ways.

The research (Willis, J. 2008) shows that different media stimulate different parts of the brain. The more areas of the brain that are activated, the more likely it is that you’ll understand and retain the information.^[1]

So to learn a specific topic, you could do the following:

Read the class notes
Read the textbook
Watch a Khan Academy video
Look up other online resources
Create a mind map
Teach someone what you’ve learned
Do practice problems from a variety of sources

Of course, you won’t be able to do all of these things in one sitting. But each time you review the topic, use a different resource or method – you’ll learn faster this way.

2. Study multiple subjects each day, rather than focusing on just one or two subjects.

It’s more effective to study multiple subjects each day to help you stay focused, than to deep-dive into one or two subjects (Rohrer, D. 2012).^[2]

For example, if you’re preparing for exams in math, history, physics, and chemistry, it’s better to study a bit of each subject every day. This approach will help you to learn faster than by focusing on just math on Monday, history on Tuesday, physics on Wednesday, chemistry on Thursday, and so on.

Why?

Because you’re likely to confuse similar information if you study a lot of the same subject in one day.

So as a tip to learn faster, spread out your study time for each subject. In so doing, your brain will have more time to consolidate your learning. [Read more…]