Is Your Smart Kid Getting Bad Grades? 5 Tips for Parents

Updated on January 6, 2026 By Daniel Wong 7 Comments

Dealing with bad grades is frustrating for both you and your children.

You know your kids are intelligent, and you care about their future.

You want them to have academic success now, so they have more opportunities for scholarships, higher education, and employment in the future.

But your well-meaning attempts to motivate your children only result in energy-draining power struggles and strained relationships — not improved performance or the accomplishment of academic goals.

Here’s the problem…

Nagging your kids to study harder is like adding fuel to the fire. It only makes the situation worse.

Fortunately, there’s an easier way to help your child do better in school and become a disciplined student — no annoying arguments or stressful micromanaging required.

In this article, I’ll walk you through how to deal with bad grades and give you valuable tips to improve your child’s motivation today. Let’s dive in.

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Why do students get bad grades?

The first step to helping your children do better in school is understanding why they’re getting bad grades.

Through speaking to and working with more than 20,000 students, I’ve learned there’s almost always an explanation for poor academic performance.

This is why telling your smart kid who’s getting bad grades to “study harder” rarely works. Instead, we must recognise the root problem behind the bad grades and make appropriate adjustments from there.

Each student is unique. Actively listening to and empathising with your child is an effective way to discover why they’re struggling academically and motivate them to do well in school.

Here are some of the most common obstacles to good grades to watch out for:

Distractions

Do your children have a difficult time focusing on their schoolwork? If so, they’re not alone.

Study after study has found that technology like smartphones and laptops can be more harmful than helpful — in some cases distracting nearly 50% of students.

Then there are the external stimuli of the classroom: whispering classmates, cluttered desks, and attention-grabbing posters.

Back at home, potential interruptions like pets, ringing doorbells, and video games make achieving quality study time all the more difficult.

It’s not necessarily that they dislike studying. They simply can’t focus on the material at hand.

If you have an intelligent kid who is getting bad grades, minimising distractions is a considerable stride towards better academic performance.

Pressure to be “perfect”

I have not failed 10,000 times — I’ve successfully found 10,000 ways that will not work. – Thomas Edison

Mistakes are crucial for growth and discovery. Imagine if Thomas Edison had given up because of a fear of failure.

He certainly would not have become one of the most successful inventors of all time!

Yet many students (and adults, too) feel the crushing need to be “perfect”.

If your children fear failure, they might quickly become discouraged the moment they make an error. As a result, they might give up on academic success altogether.

Instead of criticising imperfections, help your children identify and learn from their mistakes. Teach them about failure and how to hold their head up high. That’s how to raise a confident child.

As a result, they’ll be more motivated to stick with schoolwork — and likely earn better grades in the process.

A lack of challenging assignments

Do your children regularly say that school is boring? Do they struggle to complete their daily homework and assignments?

These are signs that your child might be under-challenged in the classroom.

When students don’t feel appropriately challenged, they often disengage with the subject matter.

They might find they don’t need to study or complete assignments to understand the topic, at least at a basic level. As a result, even though they’re smart kids, they still get bad grades.

Check in with your children and their teachers to ensure the course material is at the right difficulty level. Then, make adjustments to challenge your child accordingly.

Exam anxiety

There’s a reason why I wrote the ultimate 58-page guide to test-taking success. Exam anxiety is a common, debilitating issue for students of all ages.

Many smart kids aren’t great test-takers. They want to do well in school. They study hard and pay attention in class. But their exam grades don’t reflect those efforts.

The thing is, performing well on tests is essential for getting good grades. There’s no way around it.

Now, for some good news…

With the right test-taking strategies, many of the students I work with improve their bad grades by 20–30% — many without even studying more.

Tests and exams are a significant part of your child’s academic career. Knowing how to manage exam anxiety and master test-taking skills will pay off for years to come.

Too many obligations

Homework. Extra-curricular activities. Chores and part-time jobs.

Pre-teens and teens often feel overwhelmed because of their demanding schedules. Unlike adults, they’ve yet to master valuable organisational skills.

So to cope with their busy agendas, they sleep less, miss important assignments, or “escape from reality” by playing video games and watching television.

Help your children review their responsibilities to support their mental health. Encourage them to write down due dates and make lists. Show your kids how to plan out their days and weeks.

When students know how to manage the various things going on in their lives, it frees up important mental space for more of what matters most.

How to deal with bad grades

Now that we’ve explored some of the reasons why your children might be getting bad grades, let’s look at five ways you can help them overcome poor academic performance.

1. Set achievable goals

In the words of Antoine de Saint-Exupéry: “A goal without a plan is just a wish.”

Once you stop telling your children to study hard for their own good, ask them what success looks like to them, both inside and outside of the classroom. Get specific.

It’s much easier to arrive at our goals when we know where it is that we’re going.

Actively engaging with your children about their ambitions also puts you on the same page with regard to expectations.

Encourage your kids to outline the action steps they’ll need to take to achieve their goals. If they want to get straight A’s, what routines and study strategies will enable them to do that?

While goals are important, remind your children that it’s not the outcome but the process that matters most.

Yes, grades are an excellent source of feedback. But the growth mindset and habits necessary to achieve straight A’s? Those are what will serve your children far into the future.

2. Communicate with your child’s teachers

You’re not in the classroom with your children. Their teachers are, so have a chat with them.

This isn’t about arguing with the teachers or defending your kid’s intelligence. At the heart of it, open communication is crucial for everyone involved in your child’s academic experience.

Here are some questions that you might ask your child’s teachers:

How is my child doing emotionally and socially?

Can you tell me about any specific situations that have occurred in the clasroom that you’re concerned about?

Are the school assignments adequately challenging my child?

Where is my child seated? Is a front-row seat with fewer distractions a possibility?

What can I do at home to help my child learn more effectively?

By communicating with the teachers, you’ll gain a well-rounded understanding of what’s happening inside the classroom. Pair this knowledge with a healthy teacher-parent relationship and you’ll set the foundation for your child’s academic success.

3. Engage a coach

Sometimes we all need a little support — and that goes for you too as a parent.

Maybe there’s an ongoing conflict between you and your kids about their bad grades. Or perhaps your children ignore your advice, yet listen to similar perspectives when it comes from a fresh voice.

Here’s where a coach comes in.

The right educational coach can help your children achieve their academic goals and lighten your load. As a result, your children get better grades and your relationship with them improves.

I’ve coached hundreds and hundreds of students 1-to-1. I’ve helped them to find their inner motivation and to become successful and happy.

I love what I do, and I’d be thrilled to help coach your teenager to make a positive transformation, too.

Of course, you can also look to teachers, neighbours, or even family friends to coach your child. It’s vital that you find the right coach and mentor for your child!

4. Make studying more fun

Homework will never be able to compete with video games in terms of fun.

But even if your teen hates school, there are ways to make studying a less tedious and more engaging activity. Here are a few ideas:

Encourage your children to reward themselves with short (technology-free) breaks after laser-focused study sessions.

Turn homework into a game. Puzzles, trivia, and flashcards are great. Even teenagers enjoy gamification when it’s age-appropriate.

Create a relaxing space for your children to study. A designated homework area will keep distractions at bay and improve concentration, all while making the study process a more enjoyable one.

5. Give your child control

If you want your children to get better grades, give them control over their academics — with boundaries.

You’ll still be involved in your children’s lives and studies, and you’ll need to work with them to set clear expectations and consequences.

But there will no longer be everyday nagging and wondering how to get your teenagers to do their homework. Your children will understand their responsibilities, and they’ll act accordingly.

With this approach, your children will gain a sense of autonomy. They’ll also perform better in school.

But, perhaps even more importantly, your kids will develop a sense of responsibility and empowerment over their actions and choices.

Are punishments for bad grades effective?

I’ll get right to it…

I don’t believe in punishment for bad grades.

That’s because, as outlined above, there’s typically a reason why kids aren’t doing well in school.

And that reason is rarely that they simply don’t care.

Grounding your children for two months because they failed an exam doesn’t identify the root problem behind the poor academic performance. If anything, it leads to frustrated kids with even less motivation to do well in school.

Instead of imposing consequences for bad grades, I recommend actively listening to your children. Explore what’s contributing to their bad grades, then work to solve the problem together. The tactics outlined in this article will help.

I don’t recommend rewarding your children for good grades, either. Instead, we want to reach a point of intrinsic motivation.

This is a process-oriented approach where self-improvement and contribution are the main rewards, instead of the desired outcome being the main reward.

This approach will help your children throughout their lives, and it will result in them becoming more successful too!

The bottom line

I know it’s not easy to see your smart child getting bad grades.

But instead of micromanaging, nagging, or otherwise adding fuel to the fire, try implementing the tips in this article. Your child will perform better in school and gain essential life skills that are more important than any grade.

And remember, it’s okay to engage a coach when you and your child need it.

Learn more about my 1-to-1 coaching programme for teens (it’s life coaching and much more!) and how I empower students to succeed through science-backed techniques. I’m on a mission to maximise the potential of every student, and I’d love to support your child, too!

(If you haven’t already done so, make sure to download your free e-book below.)

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How to Get Good Grades: 10 Useful Strategies for Students

Updated on January 6, 2026 By Daniel Wong 21 Comments

Are you struggling with how to get good grades?

Don’t worry — you’re not alone.

I’ve spoken to thousands of students around the world, and many are quick to say:

“I study hard but I still get bad grades.”

Here’s the thing…

Those successful students that you know? They aren’t necessarily any more intelligent than the rest of the class.

They’ve simply developed study strategies that help them perform better in school.

You can get good grades, too. Your academic goals can be achieved by studying more effectively, not by studying “harder”.

In this article, I’ll cover the winning habits I used to be a straight-A student throughout my academic career — no all-nighters required.

Ready to stop stressing about grades and start doing better in school? Then let’s explore the useful strategies that will help you do just that.

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Why is it important to get good grades?

The first step to doing better in school isn’t cracking open a textbook — it’s understanding why good grades matter.

Now, let me say this…

Your grades do not define your intelligence or self-worth.

Your academic record is only one part of your education, and you can lead a successful life with or without straight A’s.

That being said, there are real benefits to getting good grades.

For example, a solid academic record provides more opportunities for scholarships, higher education, and employment. Academic excellence may be the bridge to your dream career.

More significant, though, are the life-changing skills you’ll gain as you work toward becoming a top student — traits like focus, determination, discipline, and confidence. These values are crucial to achieving any of your goals, inside or outside the classroom.

A good grade is more than just a letter on a page. Achieving academic success after learning how to focus when studying is a rewarding experience that offers long-lasting benefits.

10 ways to do better in school

Now that you know the value of good grades, let’s dive into the habits that will help you get them.

1. Know why good grades matter to you

We already covered why academic success is generally important.

But if you really want to know how to get good grades, it’s essential to understand why academic success matters to you.

What difference will good grades make in your life, now and in the future?

Do you have dreams of attending a specific university or following a particular career path?

Maybe you want to develop your grit and persistence — to have the confidence that comes with knowing you gave school your best effort. Or perhaps you want financial security and the ability to provide for your family in the future.

There’s no right or wrong here. Just ensure that your motivation for pursuing academic excellence is a compelling one.

Even with the best study habits, it isn’t easy to consistently put in the work required to get good grades.

Sometimes, you’ll want to quit. When you’re feeling frustrated or overwhelmed, come back to your why. It will put all those study sessions in perspective — and make the journey to becoming a successful and resilient student a more rewarding one, too.

2. Write down all important deadlines and dates

Upcoming exams. Project assignments. Events and extra-curricular activities.

You’re a busy student with a lot of dates to remember.

It’s normal to think that you can keep track of all your deadlines in your head. The only problem is, relying on memory (and memory alone) doesn’t work for anyone.

Instead, it leads to forgotten assignments, last-minute panic, and low-quality work.

There’s a simple way never to forget another assignment again. Write down every due date. Use Google Calendar or Google Keep. You can even jot it down in an old-fashioned notebook.

Choose the medium that works for you.

The less you stress about deadlines, the more energy you’ll have for completing your assignments. You’ll become a more effective student and you’ll free up valuable mental capacity for the things that matter.

3. Don’t forget to schedule your downtime

In your calendar, take a moment and block out time for relaxation.

That’s right. Not only am I permitting you to schedule downtime, I’m encouraging you to do so.

Relaxation is necessary for mental and physical well-being. You’re not a robot — no one expects you to study like one.

Pursue the activities you love. Allow your mind to be at play. Your overall health and happiness will improve, and you’ll become a better student in the process.

That’s because exercise improves concentration and creativity. Relaxation promotes memory and retention.

Free time to pursue the activities you love outside of academics develops a school-life balance — a lifelong pursuit that brings more meaning to your goals and joy to your life.

Even small blocks of relaxation are helpful. Most students can only maintain deep focus for 30 to 45 minutes at a go. Scheduling short intervals of downtime after longer chunks of work is a strategic and fun way to approach assignments.

And try not to use your phone or computer during your quick study breaks. As studies have shown, your brain won’t fully relax, and the distraction often makes it more challenging to go back to the task at hand.

4. Find a seat at the front

Can you choose where you sit in class? Then grab a seat at the front of the room.

Studies show that students who sit in the first few rows tend to get significantly higher exam scores than their peers.

Why does sitting at the front of the class make such a big difference in test scores?

One reason is focus. If you’re at the back of the room, it’s easy to become distracted by your classmates. If you sit at the front, your attention will be on the teacher — not what is happening around you.

Then there’s the issue of accountability. If you’re tucked away in a corner, it’s easy to get away with passing notes, dozing off, or doodling.

Set yourself up for success by controlling as much of your environment as possible, and you’ll stop fretting about how to get good grades.

5. Take more effective notes

Now that you’re sitting at the front of the class, you’re ready to take notes as you actively listen to your teacher.

You’ve got your notebook open and your pen in hand. What more do you need to know?

For one, there’s how to take notes effectively.

There’s a structure to note-taking that works. Otherwise, you risk jotting down ideas that make little sense later on.

Here are some tips for note-taking success:

Handwrite your notes

Handwriting your notes helps you to process and frame the information in a way that works for you.

You’ll think more deeply about what you’re writing and, as a result, remember more from the lesson during your study sessions later.

Organise your notes

Whichever note-taking method you use, keep your notes neat and organised.

Group together similar ideas. Copy your notes after class if your handwriting is messy and hard to read. Clear, easy-to-navigate notes are crucial for anyone struggling with how to get good grades.

6. Understand the topic (don’t just memorise the information)

Many students think that studying is all about memorisation.

So they make heaps of notecards for dates, facts and names, then hope they can retain enough information for the exam day.

The problem with memorising information is that it only works for the short term.

Have you ever taken an exam, only to forget most of the material a few weeks later? That’s because memorisation is not an effective way to categorise and recall information — skills that become increasingly important as you progress in your studies.

You’ll learn more and become more successful in school when you actually understand the topic at hand.

Note-taking is an excellent first step towards processing information. From your notes, summarise the material. Find connections with other topics, and draw your own conclusions.

When you realise that getting good grades is less about memorising the material and more about understanding the topic, you’ll find it much easier to perform well academically.

7. Create a consistent study routine

The students who do the best know they can’t wait for inspiration to study.

Instead, they consistently show up and do the work, even when they don’t feel like it.

You’ll become a more efficient student when you make your study routine a habit. Soon, you won’t have the mental debate over whether or not you should study. You’ll just do it.

And that’s when the magic happens — better grades and more time for the other activities you enjoy.

The first step to creating a study routine is to set up a schedule. Plan out your week in advance with set blocks of time for your studies. Faithfully stick to your plan.

It typically takes a few weeks to form a new habit, so don’t be discouraged if you find it difficult at the start to follow your routine. With time and dedication, your study schedule will become second nature.

8. Use smart test-taking strategies

There’s no sugar-coating it: If you’re asking how to get better grades, you’ll need to perform well on exams.

But what if you’re not good at taking tests?

Many students get test-taking anxiety or struggle with exam pressure. But you can still perform well on exams, even if you’re not a confident test taker. Here’s how:

Manage your time wisely

When you see the exam paper, note the total number of questions. Calculate how much time you can allocate to each question to finish within the testing period.

If you come to a question you’re unsure about, move on when you reach your self-imposed time limit. Then, you won’t miss answering the questions you do know how to do.

Avoid common mistakes

One of my top tips for how to get good grades is to avoid small errors. Always read questions twice to prevent misreading. If you’re shading your multiple-choice answers, check that you’re shading the answer that corresponds with the correct question.

When you’re nervous, it’s easy to make silly mistakes. Come equipped with the right tools and test-taking practices to stop anxiety in its tracks.

Stay focused for the entire exam

Staying focused is easier said than done. If you’re finding it difficult to concentrate on the task at hand, take a break!

Put your pencil down. Take a sip of water. Breathe deeply. It’s better to pause for a moment to regain clarity than speed through the rest of your exam.

Want to improve your grades by 20-30% right away? Check out my ultimate guide to acing tests and get 58 pages of my best exam-taking tips.

9. Don’t be afraid to ask for help

Your teachers and parents want to help you in your pursuit of academic success. If you need support, don’t be afraid to ask for it.

A study by Saint Louis University researchers found that students who ask for help are more likely to get straight A’s.

That’s not surprising.

But what if I told you the same study found that only 1 in 5 students take the time to ask their instructors for support?

Be one of the few who asks for help when they need it. You’ll likely discover that you no longer worry about how to do better in school.

10. Reward yourself for making progress

You’ve worked hard to get good grades. When you’ve made progress in terms of your habits and attitude, it’s time to celebrate!

Rewarding yourself now will help you continue to get good grades in the future.

The key is to connect the increased effort to a positive feeling or outcome. You’ll stay motivated to continue working hard — and it’ll make studying more fun too!

Remember, learning how to get good grades is just as important as finding school-life balance. Rewarding yourself when you make progress is an excellent way to do that.

The bottom line

You’re already capable of getting good grades.

All you need are the right strategies to help you become a more effective student.

I guarantee that the tips in this article will help, so try them out today!

(If you haven’t already done so, make sure to download your free quick action guide below.)

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Do Your Children Dislike Studying? Here Are 9 Things You Can Do

Updated on January 6, 2026 By Daniel Wong 9 Comments

Note from Daniel: This is a guest post by Julia Robson.

All parents want their children to do well in school and in life.

Of course, succeeding in school doesn’t mean that you’ll succeed in life.

But in a society that still places an emphasis on formal educational qualifications, it’s only natural that you want your children to do their best in school.

Unfortunately, some students just don’t like to study.

Our task as parents isn’t to punish them for their lack of interest.

It’s to help them to enjoy the learning process as much as they can, while developing the necessary life skills along the way.

(Don’t forget to download your free e-book below.)

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Before we talk about what you can do if your children dislike studying, let’s first address this question:

Why do so many students dislike studying?

Getting to the root of the problem will enable you to find better solutions.

So before you start applying a remedy, examine your children’s behaviour and talk to them and their teachers to figure out what the real issue is.

Here are some common reasons why students dislike studying…

A. They find studying boring

Some students feel bored because of the repetitiveness of the learning process.

There are also students who feel bored because the material isn’t challenging enough. If they grasp the material faster than the rest of their class, they’ll naturally feel bored during the lessons.

They’ll then attach this feeling to the entire learning process.

B. They don’t see the point in studying

Many students need to see the point of something before they’ll be willing to do it. To them, getting good grades isn’t a strong enough reason for them to study hard.

If this describes your children, devote time to bridging the gap between what they’re learning in the classroom and the real world outside the classroom.

C. They feel like they’re being forced to study

Many students dislike doing things they have to do, because they feel forced into doing those things.

To these students, having a sense of autonomy is extremely important.

D. They feel like they’ve fallen behind

Students at the bottom of the class are likely to feel discouraged.

This is especially so if they’re being teased by their classmates, or if their teachers don’t have the time to give them extra help.

Of course, there could be other reasons your children dislike studying besides the reasons listed above.

Before you start nagging or threatening them – I don’t recommend either approach – take some time to figure out the root cause of the problem.

You’ll then be able to apply the most suitable solution.

Here are 9 possible solutions:

1. Admit that studying can be frustrating

Be honest with yourself and your children, and admit that studying isn’t always fun.

But there’s a life lesson to be learned here. It’s impossible to enjoy everything that you do on a daily or weekly basis.

There will be things that have to get done, even if you dislike them.

Instead of believing it’s possible for learning to be fun 100% of the time, have an honest conversation with your children. Admit that some things may be boring and difficult to learn.

By teaching your children how to take on tasks that don’t appeal to them, you’ll be arming them with a valuable skill they’ll use throughout their life.

2. Learn together with your children

Depending on your child’s age, you can adopt a “learning together” approach in different ways.

Visiting museums, galleries, historical sites and other places can be a great way to help your children to connect what they’re learning about in school to the real world.

This approach may only be possible for certain subjects. So you can also watch relevant documentaries or movies with your children to make the learning process more interesting.

Try disentangling complex problems with them too.

You may not remember geometry or algebra as well as you’d like. But you can ask your children to explain the principles to you, and you can work on the solution together.

This doesn’t mean you should study with them every day.

Instead, establish a process where they can come to you when they get stuck or need to discuss a concept with you.

3. Use a variety of tools

Your children might find some of their school assignments to be boring or irrelevant.

Perhaps their school isn’t a good fit for their learning style?

Or maybe they would thrive if they were exposed to different kinds of learning methodologies?

While you can’t expect your children’s teachers to adopt a completely individualised approach, you can provide some additional stimuli.

Here are some resources that your children may enjoy:

You can also try audiobooks or other apps that would make the learning experience more engaging for your children.

4. Relate the material to real life

Some students just want to be able to understand why they’re supposed to learn something.

They don’t think that “you have to do this to get a better grade” is a valid reason for completing an assignment.

If this describes your children, you’ll need to empower them to understand the purpose behind the concepts they’re required to master.

Ideally, you’ll want to start providing relatable explanations at a very young age, so as to establish a principle for later.

For example:

Math is associated with money, online shopping, and personal finances. (By the way, here are my best tips on how to get better at math.)
Languages are connected to the stories your children enjoy and how humans make sense of the world
History tells us where we came from, so that we can determine where to go and how to avoid repeating mistakes from the past

And so on.

5. Don’t blame, scold or punish your children if they get a bad grade

When your children come home from school with a grade that’s lower than what you were expecting, your reaction shouldn’t be to blame or reprimand them.

Instead, have a calm conversation with your children.

Ask them how they feel about the situation, and find out what went wrong.

Have a problem-solving discussion about what your children can do going forward to learn more effectively.

I encourage you not to use your parental power to demand an explanation or demand that they get a better grade the next time around.

And definitely don’t blame the entire situation on them. If you do that, they’ll become defensive and the conversation will get nowhere.

You may need to set new rules and boundaries for your children, but it’s usually best to go through this process together with them.

6. Teach them how to fail

Failure is an unavoidable and integral part of life.

The sooner we learn to cope with it in all kinds of situations, the better.

If your children learn to cope with their failures early on, they’ll be more equipped when it matters most.

So refrain from coming to their rescue every time, even when you notice that they’re definitely not doing what they ought to prepare for a test.

If they know that you’ll always be there to remind them and keep them on track, they’ll start to rely on you too much.

This isn’t healthy, because their education is their responsibility, not yours.

The goal is to be there to support and encourage them, not to do the things they should be doing themselves.

And if they falter, don’t go down the “I told you so” route. There’s no point kicking them when they’re down.

Instead, use the approach described in Tip #5.

7. Focus on the positives

Given that you’re reading this article, there are probably a lot of negatives that you could focus on, such as:

Your children don’t enjoy learning
They’re not motivated
They’re not managing their time well
They’re not performing well in school
They don’t have a positive attitude
They don’t display resilience
They lack concentration

But this is precisely why you must refocus on the positives.

The more nagging and lecturing you do, the more likely it is that a power struggle will ensue. As a result, they’ll be unlikely to adopt a positive learning attitude.

If they aren’t performing well in school, focus on the concepts they’ve been mastering.

Focus on the areas in life in which they’ve been making progress, instead of harping too much on their shortcomings.

8. Talk to your children’s teachers

If you notice that your efforts aren’t making much headway, it might be time to talk to your children’s teachers again.

While you know your children well in a home setting, it’s hard to tell what they’re like in school.

Their teachers may be able to provide some insights and tell you what they’ve been observing about your children.

Go into the meeting with an open mind, and be ready to hear some unpleasant comments about your children.

Maybe they’ve been exhibiting behaviours in school that you’ve never seen at home?

In consultation with the teachers, develop an action plan to help your children going forward.

9. Don’t focus too much on school and grades

You don’t want to be a helicopter parent who’s obsessed with your children’s grades, how they’re doing in school, how much time they’re spending studying, and what they’ve been learning.

While doing well in school is important, there’s more to life than school.

Perhaps your children have other talents and inclinations?

Perhaps they have dreams and ambitions that don’t involve them going to university?

If you find your children getting annoyed because they feel as if you focus too much on school and grades, then give them some space.

If not, the relationship will be damaged. This will make it even less likely that your children will become self-motivated.

Conclusion

If your children dislike studying, try implementing the tips we’ve discussed in this article.

But before you do that, get to the root of the problem. If you don’t, all your efforts will be wasted.

And always remember that you’re there to support your children. As they get older, you’ll be more of a coach and consultant to them – you’re not meant to run their life as a micromanager.

If you keep this in mind, I’m confident that they’ll make excellent progress over time!

Julia Robson is a mother of two girls, and the doggie mum of two Labradors. She is a writer, a runner, and a passionate advocate for a child’s right to be themselves. She blogs on Medium while trying to find the time to set up her own blog.

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30 Excuses That Prevent Students From Succeeding in School

Updated on January 6, 2026 By Daniel Wong 11 Comments

When it’s time to do your schoolwork, do you suddenly come up with all kinds of reasons for why you’ll do it later?

If so, you’re not alone.

Every student wants to be successful in school.

And by that, I don’t just mean getting good grades.

Succeeding in school is also about enjoying the learning process, finding ways to contribute, and leading a balanced life.

In this article, I’ll explain the 30 common excuses that students make for not giving their best effort in school.

Excuses can become powerful ways of sabotaging your own success. So make sure that you’re not making any of these excuses!

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1. When I get home from school, I just want to relax

It’s natural to feel tired when you get home from school.

There’s nothing wrong with taking a break. I encourage you to do things that are both relaxing and refreshing, e.g. going for a walk, listening to music, reflecting on the day, reading a book.

These activities will allow you to recharge, as compared to doing things that are “passive” in nature, e.g. watching videos or TV, going on social media.

If you do more of the first category of activities instead of the second to relax, you’ll find that you have more energy to get started on your homework.

2. Studying is boring

The writer Raymond Chandler once said: “There are no dull subjects, only dull minds.”

What he meant by this is that to a curious person, all subjects are interesting.

If you ask the right questions and develop the right mindset, any subject can become interesting.

Cultivate the desire to find out how things work, and you’ll find the learning process more interesting.

3. School isn’t relevant

Anything you want to achieve in life will require concentration, discipline and consistent effort.

These are habits that you can develop in school, even if in the future you don’t make use of every fact you learn in class.

4. I’ll be more focused next term/semester/year

Many students say this to themselves.

The trouble is, next term or next semester or next year, they’ll probably say the same thing again.

The present moment, here and now, is all we ever have. So make a positive change starting right now!

5. It’s too much work

Achieving anything meaningful in life will require plenty of effort.

It’s been proven that it typically takes many thousands of hours of deliberate practice to attain excellence in any field.

I’m not saying you need to spend many thousands of hours on your homework. But the point is, nothing is handed to us on a silver plate – we become competent and knowledgeable by putting in the necessary work.

6. I don’t like the subjects

It’s natural to have a preference for certain subjects. But don’t neglect the subjects you dislike.

Find a way to “make friends” with the subjects you dislike. One way to do this is to find an area where they overlap.

For example, let’s say that you like music but hate math.

Did you know that music is based on math? Octaves, chords, and scales are all based on mathematical concepts. Even if you don’t like math, you still need to use it every single day. And if you really struggle, here are my tips on how to get better at math.

Or let’s say that you like math but hate history. Try studying the history of math, all the way from Pythagoras up to the present.

In life, there will be many things that you dislike doing. But you’ll need to develop a sense of responsibility in doing those things regardless of how you feel.

7. I don’t like my teachers

You don’t need to like your teachers in order to learn from them.

Focus on mastering the material instead of on how much you dislike a particular teacher.

What’s more, it’s an unfortunate reality of life that there will always be people in your life whom you don’t like – bosses, classmates, colleagues and maybe even family members.

So look at school as a training ground for you to learn how to get along with people even if you dislike them.

This is an essential life skill!

8. I don’t know where to start

You can get stuck worrying too much about where you should start.

Most of the time, getting started is the hardest part of the learning process. So you must find a way to take the first small step.

Even if you feel like starting your schoolwork in the middle of the assignment instead of at the beginning, go ahead and do that.

9. I want to be a YouTuber/influencer/gamer/celebrity/professional athlete in the future, so school isn’t important

Anyone who becomes outstanding in any field does so through commitment and hard work.

Successful YouTubers, influencers, gamers, etc. all put in far more effort than you realise.

Make use of every opportunity in school to develop this kind of work ethic. It will serve you well for the rest of your life.

10. I’ll never get good grades

Students often label themselves as “not good academically” because they didn’t perform well in a certain exam. This creates a negative cycle that can go on for years.

But these negative beliefs will hold you back and will contribute to you getting bad grades.

When you begin to focus more on the learning process instead of what grades you want to get, ironically you’ll start to get better grades.

11. I just want to have fun

There will always be things you would rather do than schoolwork.

But it all comes down to the question of what you want now versus what you want most.

What you want now is to have fun, but what you want most is to make the most of your potential and gain knowledge that will enable you to contribute more.

If you want to build a meaningful life, then you’ll sometimes need to have less fun and do more purposeful things with your time instead.

This is a decision you won’t regret in the long run.

12. My parents push me too hard

All parents worry about their children’s future. After all, they want the best for their children.

So if you find your parents continually pushing you to do better, remember that it’s because they love you more than you understand.

At the same time, you can calmly share with them how you feel, so that you can reach a mutual understanding about things related to school.

13. My friends keep distracting me

If your friends are a distraction, form a study group that consists of hardworking students.

The friendships you choose to foster will either make you or break you, so choose wisely.

14. I’m afraid of standing out or being “uncool” if I get good grades

This fear is understandable. After all, when you do well at school you will draw attention to yourself.

That attention may not be welcome, especially if people start to call you a nerd or geek.

It’s safer to be average and to not stand out.

But is that how you want to live your life?

Think of the people you admire, whether they’re writers, entrepreneurs, actors or politicians.

Were they afraid to stand out? They may have been at the start. But would they be where they are today if they had given in to those fears?

Learning not to care about what others think is an essential skill that will help you in school and life.

15. My parents say I’ll never amount to anything

Your parents probably say that in anger, but they don’t mean it.

I know it’s hurtful to hear comments like that, but remember that history is full of high achievers who were told they didn’t have what it takes.

Albert Einstein’s schoolmaster once wrote in his school report: “He will never amount to anything.”

Walt Disney was fired from his newspaper job because he had “no imagination”.

If authority figures have said discouraging things to you in the past, forgive them and move on.

Don’t let those hurtful words prevent you from making the most of your gifts and talents.

16. It’s too noisy at home, so I can’t concentrate

Your home might be noisy sometimes, especially if you have younger siblings.

But there’s always something you can do: use earplugs or noise-cancelling headphones, or do your schoolwork somewhere else.

17. My friends don’t take school seriously

No matter how old we are, peer pressure plays a big part in shaping our behaviour.

But in the end, we are responsible for what we do with our lives, not what other people do with their lives.

Make an effort to surround yourself with people who will inspire you toward excellence!

18. Everyone at school thinks I’m dumb

Do your best to not be so concerned about what other people think of you.

A teacher once wrote about Roald Dahl, who went on to become a world-renowned writer, “This boy is an indolent and illiterate member of the class.”

A school report card for John Gurdon said that science would be “a waste of his time”. In 2012, Gurdon won the Nobel Prize for Physiology and Medicine.

The fact is that no one knows what you’re capable of, including yourself.

But if you work as hard as you can, learn as much as you can, and help others as often as you can, there’s no doubt that you’ll be successful. These are important rules for success in life!

19. I don’t understand the material

There’s nothing embarrassing about not understanding the material.

In fact, that’s why we go to school – to learn concepts we hadn’t learned before.

So don’t be ashamed to ask the teacher when you don’t understand something.

If you don’t understand it, chances are that there are other people in the class who don’t understand it either.

If you feel shy about asking questions in class, make time to talk to your teacher outside of class.

20. I don’t feel like participating in extra-curricular activities

Succeeding in school isn’t just about getting better grades on tests.

It’s also about contributing and about developing skills that you’ll need later in life, such as leadership, initiative and teamwork.

It’s through extra-curricular activities that you’ll have the opportunity to do this.

So get involved and contribute to your team, club or organisation. Others will benefit from this, and so will you.

21. I already understand the material, so I don’t need to study

Check if you really understand the material. It’s easy to assume that you understand something, but you may only understand it at a superficial level. Try the Feynman technique. It will allow you to identify gaps in your knowledge so you can improve.

And if you find that you do understand the material, why not go even more in-depth and tackle even more challenging concepts?

Even if these concepts aren’t going to be tested, you’ll gain further knowledge – and knowledge is never wasted!

22. It’s my worst subject, so it doesn’t matter if I do badly

If it’s your worst subject, at some level you know you ought to spend more time studying it.

Every student has strong and weak subjects. By ensuring that you work on your weak subjects too, you’ll develop the mental strength to get things done, even if they cause you psychological discomfort.

In my opinion, this is one of the most valuable abilities to possess in life.

23. The classes are too long and boring

Classes can feel as if they go on for too long, especially if the teacher isn’t engaging.

If you can’t focus for the entire class, you can try focusing for shorter periods at a time.

For example, you can set a timer for 20 minutes and tell yourself that you’ll pay attention fully for those 20 minutes. Then give yourself a break of a couple of minutes before starting another 20-minute “focus” session.

Over time, you can increase the length of each focus session.

Of course, I don’t recommend that you tell your teacher that you’re using this approach.

But this is a better approach as compared to telling yourself that the class isn’t interesting and not paying attention at all.

24. I’m taking so many subjects, so I can’t stay on top of all of them

Yes, there are many subjects to learn, and it may seem overwhelming.

This means that you need a plan and a system for keeping up with your schoolwork, managing your projects, etc.

If you apply the tips listed in this article, I’m confident that you’ll be a more organised and effective student.

25. I’m afraid of trying hard but still not doing well

The fear of failure is universal. It’s something that every student needs to grapple with.

It may seem safer to not try at all, rather than to try and possibly fail.

But what’s much worse than failing is to look back and realise you didn’t even try. This is at the root of the regrets that countless people have.

What’s more, failure is just a story you create in your own mind. Instead of thinking in terms of failure, think in terms of experiments instead.

If you don’t perform up to expectations, then you know that the “experiment” didn’t work. So you’ll need to adopt a different approach or strategy in the future.

By changing your perspective on failure, you’ll discover that giving it your best shot is a meaningful part of the learning process, regardless of the grades you get.

But, of course, with a healthier perspective on failure, you’re bound to achieve better grades.

26. I’ll work hard only when I feel motivated

It’s great to feel motivated. But you can’t expect to feel motivated all – or even most – of the time.

Even the most productive and successful people in the world only feel motivated some of the time.

If you only get down to work when you feel motivated, then your study habits will be inconsistent.

Develop the necessary routines, systems and habits, and you’ll find that you’ll be able to get to work even if you don’t feel motivated.

As writer James Clear has noted, “You do not rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems.”

27. I’m always tired

Sleep is vital for a healthy mind and body. But most students don’t get enough sleep.

You need at least 8 to 9 hours of sleep every night to be well-rested. If you’re constantly tired, get on a proper sleep schedule.

It’s not easy to change your sleep schedule at one go, so do it gradually. For example, you can go to bed just 10 to 15 minutes earlier each night.

28. I don’t have time to study

We all have the same amount of time: 24 hours each day.

But I’m sure you’ve noticed that some people achieve much more within the same amount of time.

This is because these people prioritise and focus. Prioritising means understanding what’s important and what’s not.

If you feel as if you don’t have time to study, it’s probably because your priorities aren’t clear.

When you get your priorities clear and act accordingly, I’m confident that you’ll find that you do have the time to be an excellent student.

29. I’ll just get my work done at the last minute

Doing your work at the last minute means you’ll be in a rush.

You won’t have time to check for mistakes, and you won’t be giving your full effort to the work.

What’s more, when you do work at the last minute, you’ll be stressed!

I’m sure you already have enough stress in your life, so get your work done ahead of time.

30. My teacher doesn’t explain the material properly

If you feel as if your teacher doesn’t explain the material properly, don’t use this as an excuse not to learn.

Instead, approach your teacher outside of class and clarify your doubts. Your teacher will likely be happy to go over the material with you.

If that isn’t effective, you can use online resources like Khan Academy to learn the material.

Conclusion

Did any of these 30 excuses sound familiar to you?

Are there any excuses on this list that you need to stop making today?

If so, choose to stop making them (as well as any other excuses related to not doing your homework), and instead take full responsibility for your education and your life.

Inspired by this book (which I read several years ago), I’ve made it my life goal to live with no complaints, no excuses, and no regrets.

It’s a journey that I hope you’ll join me on – it’s been challenging but meaningful so far.

There’s freedom in deciding that you won’t make excuses anymore, so all the best as you experience that freedom for yourself! 🙂

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7 Ways to Support Your Child’s Mental Health

Updated on January 6, 2026 By Daniel Wong 3 Comments

Note from Daniel: This is a guest post by John Lim.

When I was 2, my sister was born.

I reacted to her birth by hiding in my toy car the whole night and refusing to come out.

Why?

Because I was jealous of all the attention that my sister was getting. I felt sad that no one seemed to care about me.

It doesn’t matter if your child is 2 or 22 – it can sometimes be hard for him to express how he feels.

As a parent, this can be challenging and frustrating for you.

After all, how can you support your child’s mental health if he doesn’t talk about how he feels?

Mental health isn’t just about psychological and emotional problems. It’s also about psychological and emotional well-being.

So in this article, we’ll focus on the positive aspects of your child’s mental health – resilience, optimism, and well-being.

Here are 7 tips that I trust you’ll find useful.

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1. Understand the signs that your child is struggling.

Train yourself to be attuned to your child’s emotional needs.

Every child exhibits different signs when they’re struggling. For example, when I struggled emotionally as a child, I became quiet. I wouldn’t say a word to anyone about my problems.

Over time, my parents noticed that whenever I was quiet, something was probably wrong.

They would then give me the space I needed to work through the problem.

Knowing what signs your child exhibits when she’s going through a hard time is a good way to understand her better.

Here are some of the common signs:

Your child isn’t as talkative as she used to be.
Your child is more withdrawn.
Your child doesn’t want to spend time with her friends.
Your child frequently says that he or she hates school.
Your child isn’t excited by the things that used to bring her joy, e.g. games, sports, music, art, reading, family outings.
Your child’s mood fluctuates. One moment, she might be angry or explosive, then a short while later she might be sad or distressed.
Your child is hyperactive and has trouble focusing on any given task (which are signs of ADHD).

To understand your child better, ask yourself these questions:

When was the last time she struggled psychologically and emotionally?
How did she behave during that period of time?
What did I do that helped the situation?
How did she respond to my help?

2. Spend quality time with your child.

There are no shortcuts. If you want to understand your child, you need to spend time with him.

In Carl Honoré’s In Praise of Slow, he talks about how his life was transformed one night when he was reading bedtime stories to his child.

The title of the book was One-Minute Bedtime Stories.

He realised that in his pursuit of being more productive and getting more done, he had treated time with his child as just another task he had to complete.

Hence the bedtime stories that each took only one minute to read.

Like most parents, you’re probably really busy. But ask yourself this question: “Why am I so busy?”

Yes, you’re busy working hard to provide for your family. But if you can’t spend any quality time with your child, is there a point to your busyness?

I encourage you to organise an outing with your child. Go for a hike or have a meal. Play a board game.

The point is to be intentional about it.

Here are some tips that you might find helpful:

Schedule in regular family meals.

Be serious about having meals together as a family. If you don’t put it in your calendar, it’s probably not going to happen.

Treat family mealtimes as sacred. Don’t let anything get in the way of you being present for these meals.

Set fixed boundaries related to work and family.

Have you ever checked the time at work and thought to yourself: “It’s 6 p.m. already?! I haven’t got enough work done for the day!”

At these moments, you have a choice.

You can carry on with your work, or you can shut down your computer and go home to be with your family.

Being with your family means being physically and emotionally present.

After all, work is infinite – there’s always more work you could do, no matter how much work you do today.

On the other hand, time is finite. If you don’t make time to spend with your children now, before you know it they’ll be all grown up.

Put your phone away.

When I’m out with my family for dinner, I leave my phone at home. That’s because I want to give them the attention they deserve.

You might think that leaving your phone at home sounds extreme. But I encourage you to give it a try – you might just decide that you’ll make it a habit.

And when you’re with your children, put your phone on airplane mode. This way, you won’t get distracted by messages, calls or notifications.

At the end of the day, you need to ask yourself: “How important are my children to me?”

If they’re important to you, make time to build a stronger relationship with them.

3. Be with your child; don’t do for your child.

Your child may be your child.

But she’s also growing up. She’s figuring out how to do things on her own. She’s gaining a sense of independence and autonomy.

If your child is going through a rough time, it might be tempting for you to jump in and fix the problem.

But this won’t be beneficial for your child’s mental health in the long run.

Mental health is like a muscle that’s built over time. Helping your child today won’t always help your child tomorrow.

Instead, let her try to resolve the problem herself. This will help her grow in her ability to bounce back from setbacks.

For example, if your child fails a test, don’t ask the teacher why his grading was so strict.

Instead, ask your child what she learned from the experience, and understand her feelings about the situation. Help her to decide what she can do differently next time.

In general, before taking any action, talk to your child and understand her perspective on the situation. Tell her that you’re there for her.

It’s vital that you show her that you’ll give her all the support she needs.

But it’s even more vital that you stop yourself from fixing the problem for her.

4. Model for your child emotional first aid

When you fall down and get a cut, you put on a bandage.

When you suffer a cut emotionally, do you have the emotional equivalent of a bandage?

Your child suffers emotional cuts when…

He fails an exam he studied hard for.
He gets betrayed by his friends.
He doesn’t make it to the basketball team because he isn’t good enough.
He gets scolded harshly by his teacher in front of the whole class.

Clinical psychologist Guy Winch coined the term “emotional first aid”.

He notes that “whilst every household has a medicine cabinet full of bandages, ointments and pain relievers for treating basic physical maladies, we have no such medicine cabinet for the minor psychological injuries we sustain in daily life”.

You can enable your child to build an emotional first-aid kit to help himself when things go wrong.

You can also teach him strategies for self-care on days when nothing seems to be going his way.

Here are some tips that I recommend:

Encourage your child to talk to someone when he’s going through a tough time.
Ask him to write a letter of love to himself. This letter will celebrate his positive qualities and traits.
Encourage him to draw or sketch something.
If he likes writing, give him a diary so he can record his thoughts and feelings.
Encourage him to spend some time in nature.

More importantly, model emotional first aid for your child.

Over dinner, you might share with him about the hard day you had at work and how you felt.

Don’t just talk about what you did to work through the challenges; talk about how you felt too. This will expand your child’s capacity to empathise and to label his own emotions.

You can also adopt healthy habits like regular exercise, getting enough sleep, reading for leisure, etc. to show your child how you improve your own mental well-being.

5. Share your emotions with your child.

To improve your child’s emotional well-being, she needs to be able to identify the emotions that she feels.

This means it’s crucial that – in your family – you go beyond only saying that you feel bad or okay or good.

Increasing the range of vocabulary your child uses to describe her emotions will enable her to better express her feelings.

How can you help your child to increase her range of emotional vocabulary?

I recommend playing a game called “Feelings Scrabble”.

Here’s how the game works.

First, ask your child to say any word that’s related to an emotion. Ask her to explain what the word means, and to share an example of a time when she felt that way.

For example, she might say, “Sad.” Then, you can ask her to share what “sad” means to her and talk about an incident where she felt sad.

Next, it’s your turn to do the same thing. Try using less common words like “shame”, “amusement”, “desperate”, “horrified”, “disturbed”, etc.

In addition, you can increase your child’s emotional vocabulary by talking about your day and how you felt at various points during the day.

I’m not saying that you should be talking about your feelings all the time. But it’s important to show your child that it’s okay to talk about her feelings, and that sometimes it’s okay to not be okay.

What’s not okay is bottling up everything inside you, pretending that everything is fine.

6. Thank your child.

My mother loves to cook for the family.

When my siblings and I were younger, my mother would often write instructions about what we should do for lunch when we got back from school.

She would write a note and put it on the fridge that said something like this:

There’s fish in the container and there’s rice in the pot. Please heat up the food before eating and wash the dishes after your meal. Thanks for doing the washing and eating.

In hindsight, this sounds strange to me.

I mean… shouldn’t it have been expected that my siblings and I wash the dishes after the meal? Why should my mother have needed to thank us for doing something so basic?

But now I appreciate that my mother did this.

You might feel weird about showing appreciation toward your child. But thanking your child for the things he does shows him that you don’t take these things for granted.

It helps him to build his self-esteem and self-confidence too, so don’t shy away from frequently expressing genuine appreciation.

7. Write a letter to your child.

I didn’t do too well for the A-Levels, a major exam I took when I was 18. In fact, the grades for my four main A-Level subjects spelt BBAD.

To me, those were indeed BAD grades!

I was disappointed because I had always wanted to be a doctor. But with those grades, that dream wasn’t going to be realised.

I stopped talking to my parents for some time because I didn’t know how to answer their questions related to my plans for university.

Then one night, I saw a handwritten letter on my desk.

It was from my dad, who encouraged me not to give up. To keep trying. To know that he would always support me no matter what.

That letter meant the world to me!

Sometimes, it might be hard for you to convey your heartfelt emotions to your child face to face. You can try writing a letter to her instead.

Be honest about your feelings regarding what she’s going through. Empathise with her. Let her know that you’ll always be there for her.

Most importantly, celebrate her admirable qualities – not her achievements, but her qualities.

Let her know how much she means to you. Tell her why she’s unique and special.

Celebrate her for who she is, not who you want her to be.

For example, you might write:

Dear Jane,

[State your observation]

Lately, I’ve noticed that you seem quieter than usual. You’ve been coming home later, and your teacher has also told me that you’ve been skipping classes.

[Share how you feel]

I’m worried for you because I don’t know what might happen to you when you stay out so late. I’m also afraid that you might end up being expelled from school.

[Talk about why you’re writing the letter]

I might not fully understand how you feel. But I want you to know that I’m here for you. I also want to use this opportunity to celebrate your qualities, and to tell you how much I love you.

[Celebrate your child’s qualities]

Jane, I admire how you’re so compassionate. It inspires me to see you volunteering to help people with intellectual disabilities. You’ve helped so many of them to lead richer and more fulfilling lives.

I also admire how sacrificial you are when it comes to how you spend your time and what you’re willing to do for your friends and family.

Your heart of service and love is something that stirs me to lead a life that’s focused on the needs of others.

[End by sharing that you’re there for your child]

I love you deeply. You’re my precious daughter, and you’ve always mattered so much to me. If there’s anything I can do to support you better, please let me know.

Love,
Dad

You might not notice an immediate change in your child after you give her this letter.

That’s okay. Don’t expect things to change right away.

But at least your child knows that you’re there for her, and that your love for her is unconditional.

And, for now, that’s enough.

Conclusion

Supporting your child’s mental health isn’t only about focusing on the “problematic” aspects like anxiety, fear, and depression.

It’s also about fostering positive aspects like resilience, optimism, and well-being.

It’s vital that you remind yourself of this truth, as stated by Robert Moorehead: “Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.”

Your child is a gift. A blessing. Someone who – despite the challenges along the parenting journey – takes your breath away.

Remember those moments when you laughed or cried together?

It’s easy to forget those moments, especially when your child is rebellious, angry, stubborn, or disrespectful. But never lose that sense of wonder.

Be with your child. Listen to him. Connect with him.

After all, to support your child’s mental health, it’s connection that matters most.

So invest the time to build and strengthen that connection today!

John Lim is a social worker in Singapore. He was nominated as the Student Social Worker of the Year while he was studying in England. He loves working with young people to help them understand their emotions better. He writes regularly about mental health issues here.

(If you haven’t already done so, make sure to download your free e-book below.)

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How to Be a Disciplined Student: 25 Proven Strategies That Work

Updated on January 6, 2026 By Daniel Wong 28 Comments

Do you find it hard to be disciplined when it comes to studying?

There are so many things competing for your attention.

It’s so much easier to text a friend or watch a video than it is to study. But while doing those things, you’re probably feeling guilty.

You think to yourself, “If only I had more self-control…”

In this article, I have 25 strategies to share to help you be a more disciplined student.

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1. Change your environment.

When you try to study, you may think it’s all about willpower and self-discipline.

Those things are important, but are you aware that your environment matters even more than self-control?

Some environments make it difficult to study. For example, if there’s someone in the next room playing music or talking loudly, it will be hard for you to get to work.

Even studying in your bedroom can be hard if you’re surrounded by distractions.

In contrast, have you noticed how easy it is to study when you go to a library?

In a library, there’s an atmosphere of quiet concentration – everyone is focused on their work. That’s the kind of atmosphere that will help you to be a productive student.

Of course, you don’t necessarily have to go to the library.

You could go to a different room in your house that you use exclusively for studying. If there’s a place like that in your house, it will remind you of your purpose – you’re there to study.

As such, you’ll get a lot more done.

2. Do one small thing every day that you dislike doing.

Of course, willpower is still an important part of being a disciplined student. After all, studying requires effort and focus.

These are things that don’t come naturally to most of us. You may even find yourself resisting the idea of studying.

This is where willpower comes in.

You can build up your willpower through habits. One way to do this is to perform a small task every day that you dislike doing.

For example, you could try…

Cleaning your room
Making your bed
Taking the stairs instead of the elevator
Taking a cold or lukewarm shower
Reading a book for a few minutes instead of watching videos

When you do one small thing every day that you would prefer not to do, you’ll become more disciplined.

It’s like working out: your willpower “muscle” will get stronger every day.

3. Find an accountability partner.

An accountability partner is someone who holds you to your commitments.

If you commit to studying for 90 minutes each day, your accountability partner will check in to see if you’ve followed through on this.

You’ll do the same for him or her. In other words, you’ll help each other to stay on track when it comes to your academics.

You could find an accountability partner from amongst your friends or your classmates.

There are also websites and apps that will pair you with an accountability partner, such as:

4. Be specific about the tasks that you plan to complete each day.

When you set study goals for each day or each week, make the goals as specific as possible.

This is crucial for two reasons.

Firstly, when you set goals, you’re programming your mind to accomplish a particular task.

Your brain needs details. Without details, your brain cannot form an image of what it is that you’re planning to accomplish. The more details you provide, the more likely it is that you’ll take action.

Secondly, you need specific goals because you need to be able to measure whether you achieved that goal.

For example, “study some chemistry” is a vague goal. You may have read through a few pages of your chemistry textbook, but how much meaningful work did you actually do?

On the other hand, “read Chapters 3 and 4 of the chemistry textbook and create summary notes” is a specific goal.

It’s a goal that’s easy to measure, and at the end of your study session, you’ll know whether you met your target or not.

5. Don’t say negative things about yourself.

Negative self-talk reinforces negative behaviour.

For example, many of my 1-to-1 coaching clients say things like “I’m so lazy”, “I’m a procrastinator”, or “I’m just unmotivated”.

If you say these kinds of things to yourself again and again, you’ll come to believe them. This makes it even more difficult to change your behaviour.

Studies have shown that when your teacher believes you’re capable of great things, you’ll be a much more successful student than if your teacher doesn’t expect much from you.

It’s the same with our own beliefs.

Negative thought patterns lead to low expectations for ourselves. We then act in a way that’s aligned with these low expectations.

So do your best not to say negative things about yourself.

Even if you think negative things about yourself, start by holding your tongue and refusing to say them out loud to others.

6. Realise that there’s never a perfect time to get to work.

One thing that stops students from studying is the belief that it isn’t the perfect time to start.

This leads to procrastination because you keep waiting for the ideal moment to begin your study session.

The truth is, there’s no perfect time to get started. Waiting for that moment to arrive means that you probably won’t get to work until it’s too late.

What should you do instead? Read the next tip to find out.

7. Follow a routine and schedule.

Another way to become a disciplined student is to create a routine.

For example, your routine could be that you do your schoolwork every weekday from 5 p.m. to 6:30 p.m.

Or, if you’re an early riser, your routine might be to do your schoolwork from 5:30 a.m. to 7 a.m. every weekday.

If those routines sound too restrictive to keep to every weekday, then start by following the routine only on Mondays, for instance.

Routines are about making use of the power of habit. Just as bad habits are hard to break, good habits are also hard to break.

When you have a well-established study routine, you won’t need to rely so much on motivation.

Instead of having an internal dialogue about how you should be studying, you’ll simply start your study session because it’s part of your daily routine.

8. Start small and be consistent.

If you’ve had trouble being a disciplined student, it’s best to start with small changes.

For example, you could make a commitment to study for just 15 minutes each day. Doing that every day for just one week will give you more confidence in your ability to be disciplined.

From there, you can step it up to 20 or 30 minutes a day, and so on.

Begin with small changes, notice the feeling of progress, then use that feeling to take it to the next level.

You could even make a smaller commitment. If you feel a lot of resistance to studying, just make a commitment to read the notes for one minute.

The danger of setting big goals at the beginning is that there’s a strong likelihood that you won’t meet them.

You’ll then feel discouraged and your sense of having failed will feed into a self-belief that says, “I can’t do this.”

So start small and build on the progress you make. That’s the way to become a more disciplined student.

9. Develop a cue for you to start each study session.

Productivity experts have identified a loop that exists in virtually every habit:

Stage 1: Cue
Stage 2: Routine
Stage 3: Reward

Let me explain.

The cue signals to your brain that it’s time to begin the routine. And the routine ends in some kind of reward.

In the gym, the reward might be the feeling of satisfaction after a workout. For a study session, the reward might be the feeling of mastering a topic or skill.

The most important part of this sequence is the cue.

The cue is what triggers the habit loop. A cue can be anything you do that you intentionally associate with starting a study session.

For instance, it could be putting on your headphones, making yourself a cup of tea, or putting a sign on your door that lets others know that you’re studying.

When it comes to starting work, I have a cue that consists of 4 parts:

First, I put on my earphones.
Second, I play relaxing instrumental music on my computer.
Third, I write down the specific task I’ll be working on during the work session.
Fourth, I start a timer.

Experiment with finding a cue that will become part of your study “habit loop”.

With enough repetitions, that cue will trigger your study routine and you won’t have to rely on willpower to get to work.

10. Take regular breaks.

If you find it hard to stay on task for long periods of time while studying, try “short-burst” learning.

This approach to learning recognises that our brains are not wired to focus on the same task for extended stretches.

In short-burst learning, you study for 20 to 30 minutes and then take a 5- to 10-minute break. Stop working when the 20 to 30 minutes are up, even if you feel you could keep going.

Repeat this process several times before taking a longer break, e.g. a break for dinner or to exercise.

Many students find that, by using this strategy, they’re able to do higher-quality work. They’re also able to get a greater quantity of work done too.

11. At the end of each study session, give yourself a reward.

As mentioned earlier, habit loops always end in a reward. So it’s important to reward yourself at the end of each study session.

The reward could be something simple, e.g. listening to your favourite music for 5 minutes, doing some stretches, taking a short walk, or eating a healthy snack.

Rewards are a key part of building successful study habits. They’re also a key part of eliminating ineffective study habits.

One reason why rewards are so vital is that they allow you to divide your work into manageable “chunks”.

Each chunk of work is followed by a reward, so you’re less likely to feel overwhelmed by all the work you want to complete.

12. Think about what has and hasn’t been working for you.

Another way to become more disciplined as a student is to be aware of when you are at your most productive.

Answer the following questions:

Which types of environments help you study most efficiently?
What kinds of background noise (if any) help you stay focused?
What time of day do you find it easiest to concentrate?
Do you learn better when studying one subject intensively each day, or do you prefer to study a few different subjects each day?
Do you absorb information better when reading through the material one time first, and then going back over it to take notes? Or does it work better for you to take notes during your first reading?
Is it more productive for you to take notes on a computer, or do you prefer to take handwritten notes in a notebook?

When you discover what your personal preferences are, you can use them to your advantage to develop greater self-discipline.

13. Before you start work, remove every possible distraction.

It might seem obvious, but you can’t expect to study effectively if you are surrounded by distractions.

For example, if you’re working on a computer, deactivate all email and browser notifications.

In addition, here are a couple of apps designed to create a distraction-free work environment:

Freedom (Windows, Mac, iOS, Android, Chrome): Blocks distractions across all your devices simultaneously.
RescueTime (Windows, Mac, iOS, Android): Time management app that includes a distraction-blocker.

Listening to music can help you focus, but if the music has lyrics, it may become a distraction.

I recommend that you listen to instrumental music with no lyrics while doing your schoolwork.

Clutter can also be a distraction. Clear your desk or work area of any mess, such as food wrappers, old notes, scrap paper, etc.

Most importantly, turn your phone off or put it on airplane mode for the duration of your study session. It’d be even better if you put your phone in another room.

You definitely shouldn’t be receiving calls or text messages while studying.

14. If you anticipate an obstacle, create an alternative plan.

There may be occasional events or activities in your life that prevent you from following your usual study schedule.

For example, you may have relatives visiting from out of town or medical appointments to attend. If these events are unavoidable, be sure to plan around them.

When you break your study routine, it can be hard to re-establish it.

So be proactive and make alternative study arrangements ahead of time. That way, you can keep up with your schoolwork despite these interruptions.

Be specific about what you’ll change in your schedule. Write down any upcoming events in your calendar and block out alternative time slots for when you’ll complete your schoolwork.

15. Exercise regularly.

Aerobic exercise will help you to stay focused during your study sessions.

Research shows that exercise results in neurogenesis – the creation of new brain cells.

Exercise also helps to improve the connections between existing brain cells, so that your brain works more efficiently.

Studies have shown that after aerobic exercise, problem-solving, memory and attention all improve.

So aim to exercise every day for at least 20 to 30 minutes. This will enable you to build self-control, increase your sense of well-being, and learn faster.

16. If you feel guilty about your past failures, forgive yourself.

Sometimes regret or shame about the past can prevent you from forming new habits or turning over a new leaf.

That’s why you must free yourself from negative feelings about the past.

Whatever may be haunting you from the past, forgive yourself for it. Understand that you did the best you could at that time.

One way to forgive yourself and move on is to recognise that mistakes are part of learning. Without mistakes, there can’t be long-lasting learning.

Instead of dwelling on the mistake, identify what you learned from it and how it helped you to grow.

When you feel overwhelmed by self-critical thoughts about the past, write them down on a piece of paper. Then, on the other side of the paper, write a compassionate response to each point of self-criticism.

Remember that forgiveness is a powerful healing force, whether you apply it to yourself or others.

17. Write down exactly why you want to be a more disciplined student.

To be a disciplined student, you must have a clear purpose for why you want to study hard.

When you’re clear about your purpose, you’ll find it much easier to make commitments and keep to them.

I recommend that you take a piece of paper and list all the reasons you want to become a disciplined student.

When making your list, try not to focus on the end result, such as “so that I can become a doctor” or “so that I can be a straight-a student”.

There’s nothing wrong with having such goals, but try to focus on how you want to develop as a person. By doing so, you’ll develop deeper motivation and determination.

Here are some examples of things you might put on your list:

I want to challenge myself.
I want to develop more self-control.
I want to expand my mind.
I want to cultivate a spirit of professionalism as a student.
I want to pursue excellence.
I want to make a contribution to society.
I want to build resilience.

The goal is to develop a genuine love for learning, rather than continually thinking about the outcomes you want to achieve.

18. Remember that nobody is disciplined 100% of the time.

We’ve talked a lot about how to be more focused, disciplined and organised. But it’s important to not be obsessed with perfection.

Remember that no one is disciplined all the time.

You might give in to distractions once in a while, or you might find yourself daydreaming on occasion.

This is nothing to be ashamed of because even the most disciplined student sometimes loses concentration.

The key is to consistently get back on track, one study session at a time and one day at a time.

19. Time your work sessions and breaks.

By timing your work sessions and breaks, you’ll become more intentional about how you’re spending your time.

You’ll also take the emphasis off of the work and place it on the effort you’re putting in.

You’re reminding yourself that the act of working for, say, the next 30 minutes is what’s important. Because if you complete enough focused 30-minute study sessions over the course of a day, you’ll finish all the necessary work.

Sometimes, you’ll feel as if you achieved a lot during a work session. Other times, you’ll feel as if you didn’t get that much done.

But that’s not what matters in the long run. If you develop the habit of working at set times for set periods, you’ll become more and more disciplined.

By timing your breaks as well, you won’t take breaks that are far longer than you intended.

20. Join a study group consisting of self-motivated students.

A study group can offer some of the same benefits as having an accountability partner.

When you study in a group, the other students in the group will keep you on task and remind you of your commitments.

Surrounding yourself with self-motivated students will have a positive impact on you. This is because we are shaped by the people we spend time with.

Here are some other benefits of joining a study group:

You can compare class notes. You may have missed certain details while taking notes, but you can make up for this by comparing notes with members of your study group.
You can discuss the material. A study group gives you the opportunity to discuss the course material and think deeply about the concepts you are learning.
It makes studying more fun. Studying can be an isolating experience when it involves long periods of working on your own. But having a study group makes it a social activity that’s more enjoyable.

21. Use technology to help you stay on track.

When you’re studying several different subjects, there may be a lot of tasks, resources, etc. that you need to keep track of.

The good news is that there are many online task management tools to help you stay organised.

Here are some online tools you can try out:

Trello: Helps you organise various projects and tasks easily.
Google Keep: Note-taking app that makes it simple for you to create lists and reminders.
Any.do: Productivity tool that you can use to organise your tasks and lists.
Habitica: Productivity app that uses gamification to help motivate you to achieve your goals.
BlockSite: App that enables you to become more focused by removing online distractions.
Forest: App that turns study sessions into a game, which will encourage you to concentrate for longer.
Tide: App that allows you to set up personalised study sessions, with a wide range of background sounds to choose from.

22. Every day, write down the tasks you’ve completed.

At the end of each day, spend a few moments reviewing what you’ve done that day. Make a note of all the tasks you completed, however small.

If you prefer, you can keep a running list of the tasks you’ve completed as you go along. (This is the method that I use.)

By writing down what you’ve accomplished, you’re reminding yourself that you’re making progress. This positive feeling will spur you on to develop even more self-discipline.

23. One day a week, don’t do any studying at all.

“All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.”

This is an old adage that contains a piece of timeless wisdom.

When you study hard for extended periods of time, you’re drawing energy and mental resources from a well. This well needs to be replenished periodically.

This is why an essential part of being a disciplined student is having downtime.

You could spend this downtime with your family, doing volunteer work, engaging in religious activities, or going for a walk in nature.

If you set aside one day a week where you don’t do any schoolwork or studying at all, you’ll find that the other days of the week will be more productive.

You’ll also look forward to the one day a week where you get to fully recharge.

24. Simplify your life and make as few decisions every day as possible.

Studies have shown that making decisions is tiring. Making too many decisions each day can lead to “decision fatigue”.

This is why, for example, some highly productive people – like former US President Barack Obama and Facebook co-founder Mark Zuckerberg – limit their clothing choices to one or two basic outfits.

This reduces the number of choices they have to make each day.

A good strategy is to pre-decide things that would otherwise require daily decision-making.

For example, you can pre-decide what you will wear each day by having two alternating outfits. You can also pre-decide what you will eat for lunch each day by creating a fixed menu for each day of the week.

You can even pre-decide your workouts for the week. For instance, I work out the following body parts according to this weekly schedule:

Monday: Glutes + chest
Wednesday: Legs + arms
Saturday: Back + shoulders

By following this routine, I don’t waste time and energy thinking about which body part I should work out each time I exercise.

As you pre-decide as many things as possible, you’ll simplify your life. This will leave you with more energy and willpower to focus on becoming more disciplined.

25. Be a technology minimalist.

We live in a cluttered world, which explains why minimalism is a movement that’s gaining momentum.

Some minimalists go as far as to reduce their possessions to a list of just 100 items.

You don’t need to be that extreme, but I recommend that you at least start by removing the digital clutter in your life.

For example, you can:

Decide to use only one social media app (or none at all)
Delete all apps on your phone that you haven’t used in the past month
Stop checking email on your phone completely
Remove as many of your computer desktop icons and folders as possible
Unsubscribe from email newsletters that you don’t read

Clutter makes it difficult to think clearly, which impedes your progress toward becoming a more self-disciplined student.

Conclusion

I’m confident that the tips in this article will help you to become more disciplined.

Of course, you don’t need to implement all the tips at once.

Just take three or four of these tips and put them into practice. When you see some positive results, come back to the article and implement a few more tips.

Remember to set small goals at the start. As you make progress, you’ll have the confidence to take on bigger goals.

I encourage you to get started today – it’s a journey of personal growth as a student that you won’t regret taking!

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30 Ways to Deal With an Entitled Teenager (And Encourage Gratitude Instead)

Updated on January 6, 2026 By Daniel Wong 13 Comments

Note from Daniel: This is a guest post by Veronica Wallace.

Many parents are confused about how to deal with an entitled teenager.

They also fear that their teenager doesn’t appreciate what he or she has.

Entitlement is the opposite of gratitude.

When teenagers feel entitled, they become upset and throw tantrums when they don’t get what they feel they deserve.

But when their lives are filled with gratitude, they express appreciation for the many good things they know they don’t deserve at all.

Here are 30 ways to fight entitlement and develop gratitude in your teenagers.

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How to deal with entitled teenagers

As a parent, there’s a lot you can do to fight entitlement and develop gratitude in your teenagers.

Try some of these strategies with your children and watch their perspectives begin to change.

1. Don’t just make your teens say “please” and “thank you”; explain to them why it’s important to do so sincerely

Many teens say “please” and “thank you” without sincerity.

They say it out of politeness, because their parents have trained them to use these “magic” words.

But warmth and sincerity matter more than politeness.

Encourage your children to say “please” and “thank you”, and explain to them how these words must come from a place of genuine gratitude.

Only when your children mean it each time will they cultivate a spirit of thankfulness.

2. Expect more from your teens

When you don’t expect anything of your children, they’ll expect everything of you.

Continuing to do everything for them is not how to deal with entitled teenagers.

Needing to earn something and being grateful to others for what you’ve earned is key.

Chores and responsibilities are powerful tools that will prevent your children from becoming entitled.

3. Establish boundaries

Creating boundaries is essential so that your teens understand that resources aren’t infinite.

Work with your children to establish boundaries related to spending, responsibilities, electronic devices, etc.

Show your children how you establish boundaries in your own life too.

4. Give your teens privileges that are tied to demonstrated responsibility

As far as possible, tie new privileges to demonstrated responsibility.

This will enable your teens to understand that they’ll reap what they sow.

For example, when your children keep to their curfew timing consistently for one month, their curfew timing could be extended by 15 minutes the following month.

5. Try role-playing with your teens

Teenagers who have not been practising gratitude may have a hard time expressing it when the opportunity presents itself.

To deal with entitled teenagers, help them learn how and when to express gratitude.

Role-playing scenarios in which your children could express gratitude will help them to turn gratitude into a habit.

6. Reduce the abundance in your home

One of my biggest tips for parenting teens and tackling entitlement is to remove abundance at home.

Teens who have less tend to be more grateful for what they have.

That’s why you don’t see many picky eaters around when food is scarce.

Be careful not to spoil your children by giving them whatever they want – a lack of abundance will help them to be grateful for what they have.

Reducing the abundance in your home will mean that you’ll need to make sacrifices too. But these sacrifices will be worth it when you observe your children becoming less entitled.

7. Explain the difference between wants and needs

Your children might want ice cream, but they need to eat balanced meals if they want to grow up healthy.

Help them understand the difference between wants and needs in various areas of life. As time goes by, they’ll be more appreciative whenever they get something they want (but don’t need).

8. Believe that your teens can change

Many parents have already decided that their teens are spoiled and entitled.

So every instance where their children behave in a way that seems mildly entitled confirms this belief.

Over time, these parents give up trying to fight the teenage entitlement mentality.

If you want your children to become more grateful, you must believe that change is possible.

Keep your eyes open to observe any progress that your children are making as you apply the tips in this article.

9. Model the desired behaviour for your teens

Thinking about how to deal with teenage attitude and entitled behaviour includes analysing your own behaviour.

Like it or not, your children will emulate you.

They’ll also be quick to point it out if they think you’re being hypocritical.

So take a good look in the mirror to evaluate the levels of entitlement vs. gratitude in your own life.

How often do you act entitled? How often do you express gratitude? Do you complain a lot?

Change your own behaviour and attitude, and you’ll see a change in your children.

10. Encourage your teens to keep a journal

Journalling is an excellent way to learn about your feelings and cultivate mindfulness.

Encourage your children to journal every day or week about the things they’re grateful for and the life lessons they’re learning.

Of course, if you encourage your children to do this, then you should do it too!

11. Distinguish between owed and given

Teenagers may think that they’re owed everything.

Have conversations with your teens about what they deserve and what they’ve received because of the love and generosity of others.

12. Serve others as a family

Serving others is one of the best ways to deal with entitled teenagers and children.

Be the kind of person who goes out of his or her way to help others out. Encourage your children to do the same.

Talk about why serving others is a crucial part of life, and serve others together as a family.

As Sir Winston Churchill once said, “We make a living by what we get. We make a life by what we give.”

13. Perform random acts of kindness

Do something nice for a family member, a friend, or even a stranger.

Get your teens involved in performing these random acts of kindness too.

It’s impossible for your children to become kinder without also becoming less entitled.

If you’re not used to performing such acts of kindness, it will feel strange at the start. So be sure to begin by taking tiny steps!

14. Talk about money and how much things cost

Teens sometimes think ATMs are magical machines that dispense money.

Providing opportunities to learn about the value of money is essential when dealing with entitled teenagers.

Explain to your children how much various things cost, e.g. groceries, electronic devices, restaurant meals, cars, houses.

Talk to them about the dangers of accumulating credit card debt, and explain to them how you’re being intentional about living within your means.

Teach them to ask the question, “Can I afford it?” But teach them that it’s even more important to ask the question, “Do I need it?”

After all, just because we can afford something doesn’t mean that we need to have it.

15. Create gratitude rituals

When dealing with entitled teenagers, put more opportunities in place to practise gratitude.

For example, once or twice a week before a family meal, you can go around the table and ask every family member to share one thing they’re thankful for.

16. Don’t lecture or nag your teens about gratitude

Instead of lecturing or nagging, have casual family discussions about gratitude whenever relevant situations arise.

Gratitude is a value that must be both taught and “caught” – caught through the day-to-day interactions within the family.

17. Talk about things in the past that you’re grateful for

It’s helpful if you occasionally talk to your children about things in the past that you’re thankful for – even things that seemed bad at the time.

For example, you might be grateful that you didn’t get your initial dream job, because the setback propelled you down an even more meaningful career path.

There are even cancer patients who talk about receiving the “gift” of cancer.

They call it a gift because it taught them to live more intentionally and purposefully.

18. Teach your teens to practise mindfulness

Mindfulness allows your teens to fully experience their own emotions and to become more self-aware.

In turn, this fosters gratitude.

Performing deep breathing exercises and focusing on doing just one activity at a time (e.g. eating a meal alone without doing anything else like using your phone) can help to develop the mindfulness habit.

19. Ask your teens open-ended questions

To better understand how and what your children are feeling, ask them open-ended questions.

This will enable you to have meaningful discussions with them about what gratitude is and how to cultivate it.

20. Develop a family culture of empathy

Building empathy is a great way to deal with entitled teenagers.

Help your children to put themselves in other people’s shoes.

Ask them about why they think other people reacted the way they did in various situations.

The more often they try to empathise with others, the better they’ll understand the feelings of others.

Empathy and compassion are wonderful tools that enable gratitude to flourish.

21. Limit screen time

When teenagers indulge in screen time, their focus is largely on themselves.

During screen time, these are the typical questions that they’re asking themselves:

What fun do I want to have?
Which apps are the most entertaining to me?
What videos do I want to watch?
What should I post on social media?
Which games do I feel like playing?

Of course, screen time isn’t all bad. But you can see how it promotes self-centred thinking.

In contrast, empathy, compassion and gratitude are focused on others.

So it’s important that you have a family discussion about setting limits for screen time for everyone in the family – including you!

If you show that you’re intentional about limiting your own screen time, your children will be more open to having limits on their screen time too.

22. Help your teens to develop a growth mindset

A growth mindset is one that’s focused on the process and on learning from both your successes and failures.

A growth mindset for students is instrumental in developing the right kind of motivation. As your children begin to see every challenge as an opportunity, they’ll become more thankful for the obstacles in their path.

23. Be charitable

Donate to charities and volunteer on a regular basis.

Involve your teens in these activities, so that they’ll be exposed to the many needs that exist in society.

As a result, they’ll become more compassionate and less entitled.

24. Live a life of love

Be a person who is always showing love toward others.

Gratitude is a key component of love, and vice versa. One can’t exist fully without the other.

In practical ways, show love and concern for your family, your friends, and strangers.

The more love your family shows toward others, the more gratitude you and your children will express.

25. Empower your teens to become independent

When your teens are dependent on you for almost everything, they’ll feel entitled to everything they get.

If teens are too dependent on their parents, they feel powerless yet entitled. This is a bad combination.

Let go of the reins bit by bit.

Allow your children to gain confidence as they make more decisions, and take full responsibility for those decisions.

The more problem-solving abilities they develop and the more mature they become, the more they’ll appreciate the resources they have access to.

26. Do things that require more time and effort, and less money

When your teens see you spending money, it can often seem too easy to them.

By tapping a few times on your phone or swiping your credit card at a store – just like that, you’ve made a purchase.

Your children don’t see the hard work that went into earning the money that you’re spending.

This disconnect subconsciously breeds a sense of entitlement in your children.

Entitled teenagers continue to expect rewards even when they’ve only put in minimal effort.

That’s why it’s better to do things that require more time and effort, and less money, whenever possible.

When your children see the effort that goes into organising a camping trip or helping a neighbour move to a new home, they’ll understand the value of hard work.

Over time, as they develop a stronger work ethic, they’ll become more grateful.

After all, have you ever met someone with a strong work ethic and a positive attitude who was also entitled?

27. Find a mentor for your teens

It can sometimes be difficult to discuss issues related to entitlement and gratitude with your teens.

That’s why it’s beneficial for your teens to have a mentor.

Teenagers are far more likely to thrive when they have a mentor or coach.

A mentor can help your children to reflect on their weaknesses and develop a more holistic perspective. This is essential in order for them to mature and grow.

28. Write thank-you notes

Nowadays, it’s rare for people to send handwritten thank-you notes.

Be one of those people who does it. It’s a thoughtful gesture that doesn’t take much time.

Encourage your children to write thank-you notes to their teachers and friends at the end of each semester, or whenever the opportunity arises.

29. Experiment

There are many recommendations listed in this article.

Try out a few of these methods at a time and see which ones work best for you and your family.

The more consistent you are about experimenting with the tips, the greater success you’ll see.

30. Start small

Don’t try to implement all of these tips at once – that would be too overwhelming for both you and your teens.

Start small and be patient. Write down and track exactly which tips you’re implementing each week.

Day by day, you’ll observe positive changes in your children as you develop a family culture of gratitude.

Encouraging gratitude in entitled teens is an ongoing process

Cultivating a spirit of gratitude is a lifelong process.

There are times when all of us could be more grateful and less entitled.

Through the process of teaching your teens about gratitude, you’ll sometimes feel frustrated.

When this happens, remind yourself of how thankful you are to be a parent, to have the daily opportunity to lead and empower your children.

Being a parent is challenging, but it’s also a privilege.

This is a privilege to be grateful for! 🙂

Veronica Wallace is a childhood educator, writer and blogging enthusiast. She loves applying her knowledge of writing to new content pieces.

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