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30 Simple Ways to Set a Good Example for Your Children

Updated on January 6, 2026 By Daniel Wong 4 Comments

Family

As a parent, you know it’s important to lead by example.

As Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, “What you are speaks so loudly, I can’t hear what you are saying.”

But life can get so busy.

There are chores to do, errands to run, projects to complete, and events to attend.

And of course, there are also children to bring up.

So it’s to be expected that many parents rarely ask themselves, “Am I setting a good example for my children?”

Through my extensive 1-to-1 coaching work with pre-teens and teens, I’ve observed first-hand how much influence parents have on their children – whether good or bad.

So in this article, I’ll share with you 30 simple ways for you to set a good example for your children.

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1. Be vulnerable. Don’t be afraid to tell your children about your failures and shortcomings. Share with them how you’ve learned to be resilient. Explain to them how you overcame the challenges and obstacles you faced. This approach is vital as you think about how to build confidence in your kids.

2. Value relationships over material wealth. I’ve heard it said that we ought to love people and use things. But many people do the opposite: they love things and use people. Show your children that relationships always matter more than things.

3. Embrace challenges. Get outside your comfort zone on a regular basis and confront your fears. Your children will learn from your positive attitude.

4. Be committed to personal development. Always be improving yourself in some way, e.g. knowledge, habits, skills, emotional control. Your children will see how committed you are to leading a better life, day by day.

5. Write cards to your friends. My own mother used to do this often as a way of encouraging her friends. This helped me to see how vital it is to invest in your friendships.

6. Volunteer and do charity work. We all want our children to serve others and contribute to their communities. Let’s set an example by making a difference through some kind of volunteer work.

7. Invite your neighbours over for dinner. By doing this, you’ll show your children the importance of hospitality. You’ll also forge a deeper relationship with your neighbours.

8. Take care of your health. I’m sure you want your children to be healthy and strong, so lead by example in this area. Exercise regularly, eat well, and get 8 hours of sleep every night. Not only will you be healthier, but you’ll also have more energy to be a great parent!

9. Focus on health rather than appearance. Many parents I know often complain about their “fat thighs” and “flabby arms”. This sends the message to their children that appearance is what matters, when health and healthy habits are what actually count.

10. Compliment others sincerely. By paying someone a sincere compliment, you might make his or her day. Start by saying positive things to your children and other members of the family.

11. Manage your emotions. When faced with frustrating or worrying situations, use various techniques to stay calm. Your children will learn from you how essential it is to stay in control of their emotions and not take things out on others.

12. Listen attentively.  If someone is speaking to you, put away your phone or any other distractions and listen attentively. This is one way to show respect toward others. And, in turn, get your kids to respect you by listening to you when you speak.

13. Don’t be too concerned about what others think of you. As Ann Landers once said, “At age 20, we worry about what everyone thinks of us. At age 40, we don’t care what anyone thinks of us. At age 60, we realise that nobody has been thinking of us at all.” We should be more concerned about living a purpose- and values-driven life, instead of worrying about gaining the approval of others.

14. Ask to hear the opinions of others. Instead of just caring about what you think, seek out the opinions of others. This will widen your own perspective.

15. Become an organised person (if you aren’t already one). Write things down, use a calendar, and always have a plan. Your children will see your example and become committed to developing organisational skills too. I’ve observed that organised people tend to be far less stressed!

16. Forgive yourself and forgive others. If you’re living with shame or regret, now is the time to forgive yourself. And if you’re holding on to grudges because of what others have done to you, now is the time to forgive them.

17. Be generous with your time and money. Show your children that resources are meant to be given and shared for the benefit of others. The more we give, the more we live.

18. Be grateful. If you find yourself complaining often, decide that from today onwards you’ll cultivate a spirit of gratitude. Over time, your children will become more thankful too!

19. Don’t say negative things about yourself. I know parents who say many negative things about themselves, e.g. “I’m too uneducated to be successful”, “I’m impatient”, “I have a bad temper”. Focus more on opportunities and possibilities instead of your limitations.

20. Follow the rules and obey the law. Do this even if there’s no chance of you being caught for any wrongdoing. By displaying integrity, your children will learn to do the right thing, even if no one is looking.

21. Be dependable. Few people do what they say they’ll do 100% of the time. Become one of those people, and demonstrate to your children how crucial it is to be a trustworthy person. I’ve observed that the more dependable you are, the more likely it is that you’ll be successful.

22. Apologise when you’ve made a mistake. My coaching clients (the majority of whom are pre-teens and teens) frequently tell me that they don’t respect their parents. This is because their parents don’t apologise, even when it’s clear that they’ve made a mistake. Don’t be one of these parents!

23. Celebrate the successes of others. Acknowledge and celebrate the successes that others achieve. This way, your children will understand why they should never be a sore loser.

24. Find meaning in your work. All work (except work that is illegal or unethical) is meaningful. Work isn’t something we have to do; it’s something we get to do in the service of others, while also earning a living. Demonstrate to your children that with the right attitude, work can be enjoyable and fun!

25. Ask for help if you need it. We all come to a place where we need help. If you need assistance or guidance, don’t hesitate to reach out. As the African proverb goes, “If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.”

26. Live within your means. Don’t get so caught up in the pursuit of material gain that you buy things you can’t afford. Living beyond your means will lead to a life of stress and possible ruin.

27. Buy what you need, not what you want. As a follow-up to Point #26, practise asking yourself the question “Do I need this?” instead of the question “Can I afford this?” You might be able to afford something, but if you don’t need it, then you probably shouldn’t buy it.

28. Read for leisure. If you don’t read for leisure, your children are unlikely to read for leisure. Once in a while, share with your children the interesting things you’re learning through the books you’re reading. Your children may become more motivated to work hard in school too!

29. Make an effort to mend broken relationships. As Dr. Scott Sticksel once said, “Life is relationships. The rest is just details.” If your life is full of broken relationships, it’s almost impossible for you to find joy and fulfilment. So if there are broken relationships in your life, take the first step toward resolving the conflict.

30. Be excited and passionate about life. One of my coaching clients recently said to me, “My parents don’t seem excited about anything in life, except eating good food.” This client of mine was troubled by this fact, and he wondered if his life would turn out to be as “sad” as his parents’ lives. I’m not here to judge anyone, but if you want to set a good example for your children, then choose to be passionate about life. Learn a new skill. Show kindness to others. Start a new project. Conquer a fear. Contribute to your community. Get outside your comfort zone. Take just one small step today!

Conclusion

Parents and children

At this point, you might be thinking, “You mean I’m supposed to do all these 30 things to set a good example for my children? I’m not perfect, you know?!”

Of course, you’re not perfect. Neither am I.

But we can always strive to improve, to become better people and better parents who have better parenting skills.

So I encourage you to identify just one or two items from the list that you’d like to work on. Make one small change this week, or even this month.

As John C. Maxwell said, “People may teach what they know, but they reproduce what they are.”

This principle applies to parenting too. As parents, we reproduce in our children the traits we possess.

As such, if we want to raise exemplary children, we need to lead exemplary lives ourselves.

This is a lifelong journey that we get to embark on. So let’s embrace the challenges along the way with hope and excitement!

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Filed Under: Children, Parenting, Relationships, Teens

22 Study Habits That Guarantee Good Grades

Updated on January 6, 2026 By Daniel Wong 18 Comments

Study habits

Were you hoping to get an A for your last test or exam, but your study habits got in the way?

Maybe you got a B, or maybe you did worse than that.

It’s annoying, isn’t it…

You put in all those hours of studying. You even gave up time with your friends.

So what if I could show you a way to work smarter and not harder, so you get good grades and have time for the things you enjoy and find meaningful?

Even better, what if I could guarantee it?

Well, I can.

All you have to do is adopt these 22 study habits.

(Throughout my career as a student I got straight A’s, so I can promise you that these study habits work.)

Want to get the grades you’ve always wanted while also leading a balanced life?

Then let’s get started.

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The best study habits

Add these effective study habits to your routine to start getting good grades with a lot less stress.

Habit #1: Create a weekly schedule

When you schedule time for a particular task like studying, you’re saying to yourself, “I’m going to focus on studying at this time, on this date, and it’s going to take this number of hours.”

Once it’s down in writing, it becomes a reality and you’re more likely to stick to it.

This might sound weird, but it’s true.

Do this in your calendar, in a spreadsheet, or download a template – whatever works best for you.

First, think about your fixed commitments like school, sports practice, family time, religious activities and so on.

Now, decide which times around these fixed commitments are the best for you to do your work and revision each week.

Don’t worry about exactly what work you’ll be doing, or what assignments are due. Just focus on blocking out the times.

Your weekly study schedule might look something like this (the blue slots are the times you’ve blocked out to do work):

Weekly schedule

Give yourself a study-free day (or at least half a day) once a week.

Everyone needs a break, so you’re more likely to come back to the work refreshed if you give yourself permission to take some time off.

Habit #2: Create a pre-studying checklist

Have you ever heard your mother say you should never go to the supermarket without a shopping list?

You’ll wander up and down the aisles, wasting time. You’ll make poor choices about what to buy and end up with all the wrong things for dinner.

By using a shopping list, your mind will be focused. You’ll only put items in your shopping trolley that you need, checking them off as you go.

It’s no different from a checklist used by a pilot before he takes off, or a mechanic as he services a car.

Checklists are essential as you learn how to develop good study habits. They ensure that you cover all the necessary steps to achieve an outcome.

Here are some of the things that might be on your pre-studying checklist:

  • Set up workspace
  • Make sure your phone is in another room or turned off
  • Let family members know not to disturb you until the end of the study session
  • Gather together all the notes and reference books needed
  • Get a glass of water
  • Set timer

Keep your checklist handy, and tick everything off at the start of every study session.

Habit #3: Create a study plan

The purpose of a study plan is similar to that of a checklist. It keeps you on track.

When you go camping, you might have a checklist that covers all the equipment you need to pack into the car.

But you also need a road map to show you how to get to the campsite. It allows you to plan your route, and keeps you focused on your destination.

So, at the start of each study session, create a study plan.

For example, today you might need to complete a math assignment and write up the summary notes of chapter 4 of your history textbook.

Write down the key tasks, together with a list of steps you’ll need to take along the way.

To complete your math assignment, you might write:

  • Read notes from math class
  • Read chapter in the textbook on algebraic calculations
  • Do questions 1 to 3

Your study plan will help you concentrate on what you need to get done today, without being distracted by the things that can wait until tomorrow.

Habit #4: Study offline as much as possible

Study offline

When you study, you want to be focused, which means limiting all those annoying interruptions that happen when you’re online.

Switch off your Internet connection and give your brain the peace and quiet it needs to concentrate.

And while you’re at it, try not to use a laptop to take notes.

This may sound like strange advice, but research has shown that taking notes by hand is a much smarter way of learning.

When you write notes by hand, your brain absorbs the meaning of what you’re writing. But when you use a laptop, you’re not processing what you’re learning as deeply.

Habit #5: Take three deep breaths before each study session

What’s the one thing that comes to you so naturally, you don’t even think about it?

Breathing.

We each take about 20,000 breaths a day, so you’d think we’d be pretty good at it. But did you know that there are better ways to breathe than others?

And guess who breathes the best? Babies.

As babies, we all take deep, relaxing breaths. These breaths push the oxygen around our bodies and into our brains, helping us to concentrate better.

But as we get older, we take shorter, faster breaths. As a result, we have trouble staying alert.

There are plenty of ways to breathe more deeply, but here’s one method you can try before you start each study session:

  • Close your eyes and breathe in through your nose for four seconds
  • Exhale through your mouth for four seconds
  • Repeat three times

Tip: Try this just before you go to bed as well. It will help you sleep better.

Habit #6: Learn how to motivate yourself

Do you find that sometimes it’s almost impossible to start studying? In fact, your body feels like a heavy stone as you drag yourself towards your workspace.

Don’t worry. Everyone feels like that from time to time.

You just need to know how to motivate yourself to study, and to do that we’re going to create another list.

This time, write down all the reasons why you want to study hard, such as:

  • I want to do my best
  • I want to become more disciplined
  • I want to prepare well for the future
  • I want to develop perseverance
  • I want to learn as much as I can

Put your list somewhere you can see it. The next time you feel like watching TV instead of studying, go through your list.

You’ll be fired up and ready to get back to your studies in no time!

Habit #7: Take notes during class

Taking notes in class is an important study tip to implement.

Why?

Think about the number of classes you go to every day at school and the mountain of information that gets thrown at you.

You’d never be able to remember everything you learned without taking notes.

Taking notes also helps you to absorb and retain information much better than just listening.

And lastly, think of your class notes as the backbone of your focused study time. They sum up what you’ve learned, and they make your study time more efficient.

(Here are some proven tips on how to take notes effectively.)

Habit #8: Review what you learned in school that day

Review what you learned

Reviewing new information you learned in class is one of the most effective study habits you can develop.

Before the end of each day, read the notes you took or re-read the chapter that your teacher taught in class.

It won’t take long to do, and it will help you retain what you learned. It will also make the process of moving the information from short-term to long-term memory smoother.

Habit #9: Read your notes before you start doing your homework

This is similar to the last study habit we talked about.

The first thing you should do in your study session is to re-read the notes you took in class before you start the homework assignment for that topic.

Don’t forget to include this task in your study plan (see Habit #3).

It will refresh your memory, so you’ll be well prepared to tackle the assignment and you’ll finish your homework faster.

Habit #10: Get at least eight hours of sleep every night

We all know that a good night’s sleep makes us more alert and energised the next day.

But did you know that it also improves your memory and makes you a better student?

You probably think there’s no way a top student could get enough sleep, but you’re wrong. In fact, getting eight hours of sleep before an exam is more effective than staying up late, trying to cram all the information in.

The best way to make sure you get eight hours of good quality sleep is to go to bed at the same time each night. (Set an alarm to remind you, if necessary.)

Read a chapter of a book, but don’t read it on your phone or tablet. This is because the light from such screens makes it difficult for the brain to wind down and inhibits melatonin production.

In addition, turn off phones and other electronic devices that may disturb you during the night.

Habit #11: Create an environment that helps you study

Trying to work in a noisy room, or one with poor lighting, is going to make your study time less effective.

To develop good study habits, take a few minutes to ensure your workspace is conducive to studying.

Here are a few things to think about:

  • Do you have the necessary supplies and stationery within reach?
  • Is the lighting adequate?
  • Make sure your desk is tidy and uncluttered (do this before and after each study session)
  • Is the room at the right temperature?
  • Is your work chair comfortable?
  • Is the room quiet? (Use earplugs if necessary)
  • Is your phone switched off?
  • Delete any apps on your phone that you might be tempted to open when you should be studying
  • Are there any other distractions in the room that might disturb you, like a magazine or the TV? Switch them off or remove them altogether.

Habit #12: Time your study sessions and breaks

Time your study sessions

Do you find it hard to concentrate for more than 45 minutes at a time? That’s perfectly normal.

In fact, I’d recommend that you take a 5-minute break from studying every 30 to 40 minutes.

Don’t fall into the study habit of stretching out your break so it ends up being longer than your study time, though.

When you start a study session, set a timer for 30 to 40 minutes and then take a break. Likewise, set the timer for the end of the break so you know when to get back to work.

Habit #13: When you take a study break, step away from your desk

To develop good study habits, don’t forget to take breaks and use them wisely.

Step away from your desk and do something completely different to give your brain a break, as well as your body. Go for a short walk around the block or get a snack from the kitchen.

I encourage you not to watch a video, turn on the TV or check your social media news feed.

This is because these activities won’t give your brain a proper break.

Habit #14: Make use of the breaks you have during the school day

Do you have a long break in the middle of the school day or after lunch?

Is there something useful you could be doing with this time?

Maybe you could review the notes you took that morning or start preparing your study plan for later in the day.

Another great use of your free time is to seek out a fellow student and talk about what you’ve just learned. This is especially so if you need some clarification, or if you have doubts about something.

Don’t be afraid to ask questions. It’s an excellent way to learn faster and better.

Habit #15: Stay on top of your homework

This may sound like an obvious habit to cultivate as a student, but I’m often surprised by the number of students who let their homework pile up.

If it gets out of hand, just the thought of doing your homework can become overwhelming and stressful.

Before you know it, you’ll find yourself working so hard to catch up, you’ll have no time to study for important tests and exams, which are stressful enough on their own.

One of the most effective study habits to practise is to start your homework on the day it’s assigned.

At the very least, take a look at the questions while the information you learned is still fresh in your mind.

That way, if you have to come back to it later, you’ll have a rough framework as a starting point, making it much easier to complete.

Habit #16: Ask your teachers for help at least once a week

Ask teachers for help

Your teachers are there to help you succeed. Don’t be afraid to reach out to them.

Asking for help is a crucial study habit to cultivate.

Include asking for help in your weekly schedule (see Habit #1) and keep a list of any questions you think of during the week.

Bring the list of questions with you, and don’t let them pile up.

If you let the questions pile up, you may start to feel overwhelmed, and you may become reluctant to seek help.

Habit #17: Use a planner to keep track of assignments and deadlines

If you’re not organised when it comes to things related to school, you’ll waste precious time doing last-minute work you forgot about.

Or you may stay up late to finish an assignment you should have started a week earlier.

Use a planner to keep track of important dates, tasks and deadlines. You can either use a physical diary or an online one like Google Calendar.

The important thing is to keep your planner up to date, so you don’t have to rely on your memory or wait for your teachers to remind you.

Planning and studying effectively will improve your test-taking skills and performance.

Don’t just include the date of a test, for example, when you use your planner. Include a reminder to start revising for the test well in advance.

And review your planner at least once a week. Every Monday, go through all the upcoming deadlines, and prioritise the tasks and projects you’ll need to keep on top of for the week.

Habit #18: Test yourself periodically

Don’t wait for regular tests and exams to come around before you start studying. Set mini-tests for yourself every few weeks.

You may have reviewed your class notes once, but it doesn’t mean the information has been absorbed or effectively memorised for a future exam.

Here’s how to test yourself…

When you review your class notes, highlight some of the key things you’ve learned.

For example, in history it might be the date of an important event. Write down some test questions on a separate sheet of paper as you go, such as “When did the war start?” or “What caused the civil war?”

The next day, pull out the test questions and see how many answers you can remember.

It takes some effort to succeed at a test you give yourself, but that effort will be rewarded when it comes to exam time.

Habit #19: Check your work before you consider it done

When you finish an assignment, don’t consider it done until you’ve double-checked your work for careless mistakes.

Here’s what you should be looking out for:

  • Spelling mistakes
  • Grammar mistakes
  • Poor presentation
  • Have I responded to the question?
  • Have I left out key facts?
  • Have I got the equations correct?

Habit #20: Keep a “worry” list

Keep a "worry" list

It’s common for students to worry about not doing well, but it’s a distracting pastime.

When you worry about something, it can hinder your ability to focus on learning and improving.

That’s why you need to keep a “worry” list.

Strange as it may sound, research has shown that writing down a list of your fears about school can actually improve your grades.

When you write down a list of your worries, it’s as though you’re unloading your anxieties and freeing up your brain to concentrate on learning.

So whenever a worry pops into your mind, write it down and move on.

Habit #21: Use online resources (if your teacher isn’t available)

Your teacher should be the first person you go to with a question or concern about the class material – unless you can easily find the answer on the Internet.

But if your teachers aren’t available when you need something clarified (which often happens in the middle of study time), there are some great online resources you can use.

Here are some of them:

  • Khan Academy
  • SparkNotes
  • BBC Bitesize
  • Mathispower4u

Habit #22: If you struggle with procrastination, use the Pomodoro Technique

Procrastination or a lack of focus is a big problem during study time.

We’ve already talked about the need to take regular breaks (see Habit #13), but there’s another method you might find useful.

It’s called the Pomodoro Technique.

The idea is that you’ll stay on top of your work if you break your study periods up into focused but manageable bursts of 25 minutes.

This is instead of trying to concentrate for two hours or more at a go, which takes a lot of energy and willpower.

The objective is to train your brain to focus on a task that needs to be completed and postpone all distractions until later.

Here’s how it works:

  • Set a timer for 25 minutes
  • Concentrate 100% on studying until the timer rings
  • Take a five-minute break – and remember to step away from your desk
  • Repeat until the end of your study session

Here are some apps you can try:

  • Focus Booster – This is available for desktop and mobile devices. You can download the starter version for free.
  • Pomofocus – This one is free and doesn’t need downloading. Just open it up and start the timer.

Check out this article for even more apps you can use.

Start practising your new study habits

Well done! You’ve read about the 22 study habits that are guaranteed to improve your grades.

(On top of that, here are 8 bad study habits you’ll want to avoid.)

Reading about these habits is a great start. But nothing’s going to change if you just click away from this article.

If you’re wondering how to get good grades, you need to take action – every day, every week, and every month. Start tomorrow with just one new study habit. Make it part of your daily routine.

After a week, pick another one and put it into practice.

Before you know it, you’re going to turn those disappointing B’s and C’s into straight A’s. I guarantee it!

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Filed Under: Discipline, Education, Goals, Learning, Success, Teens

How to Motivate Your Teenager to Do Better in School: 10 Tips Guaranteed to Work

Updated on January 6, 2026 By Daniel Wong 32 Comments

Motivate your children to do well in school

Do you have trouble motivating your children to study?

It’s a common problem that I see in my coaching work with pre-teens and teens.

I notice that many parents approach this problem in the wrong way.

In this article, I’m going to explain 10 principles for motivating children to do well in school.

(Don’t forget to download your free e-book below.)

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How NOT to motivate your teenager to do better in school

The first five items on the list below might be things you’ve done in the past, but there’s no reason to get down on yourself about them.

They’re simply common parenting habits that are born from good intentions, but ultimately are not effective motivational tools.

You can start today to become a better listener, less controlling, and more accepting. Let’s take a look at what to avoid going forward.

1. Don’t annoy your children

One of the keys to motivating your children to work hard is not to annoy them.

This may seem odd at first, as we’re used to parents getting annoyed with children, not vice versa.

Mother and sonBut relationships are a two-way street, and parents can also annoy children.

If your children are continually upset with you over things you say or do, they will find it hard to listen to you.

You may have some great wisdom to offer them, but your children won’t be receptive to your advice.

Parents often engage in power struggles with their children. For some of us, these are habits we learned from our own childhoods.

But power struggles with your children consume a lot of energy. And that’s energy that could be spent on something more constructive.

Another habit to avoid is making comments that suggest your child isn’t good enough.

This may be something you’re not aware that you do.

It may be very subtle. For example, take the statement: “You’re improving, but I know you can do better.”

On the surface, it sounds like encouragement. But you’re actually telling your child that he or she isn’t good enough.

Or take a statement that begins: “When I was your age…” These kinds of statements usually involve a comparison that leaves your children feeling bad. So avoid making these types of comments.

Another trap that parents fall into is comparing their children with someone else’s. Parents often hope that these comparisons will inspire their children to do better.

Unfortunately, these comments have the opposite effect.

“I hear that John got A’s in all his subjects the last term” may seem like an innocent remark. But it’s a comparison that leaves your child feeling worse about himself or herself.

This is not the way to motivate your children.

Sometimes, parents try to motivate their children by giving them lectures. But lectures tend to make children feel powerless and resentful.

Instead of lecturing your children, discuss the issue with them and ask them what they think. This is much more effective than lecturing them.

Why?

Because it gets them involved, and makes them part of the solution.

2. Don’t use rewards, punishments, or threats

win prizes signAs a parent, it’s tempting to use rewards, punishments or threats to motivate your children to behave in a certain way.

Research has shown this approach doesn’t work in the long term.

There are three reasons in particular that rewards and punishments are to be avoided.

Firstly, rewards and punishments are bad for your relationship with your children.

They teach your children that they’re loved for what they do and not for who they are. Children who grow up unsure that they’re loved for who they are tend to make poor life choices later on.

Secondly, rewards and punishments may get short-term results, but they ignore the underlying issue: Why is your child not motivated?

It’s much better to address the root cause than to use a band-aid approach of rewards and punishments.

Thirdly, rewards and punishments put your children’s focus entirely on outcomes. Your children’s level of motivation is based on the promise of the reward or the threat of the punishment.

Rewards, punishments and threats don’t teach your children how to develop intrinsic motivation. They don’t cultivate in your children a love of learning.

As mentioned earlier in this article, it’s better to focus on the process and not the outcome. This way, your children will develop self-discipline and a sense of responsibility.

So what should you do instead of using rewards and punishments?

Discuss with your children the joy (and benefits) of learning and studying.

Explain to them that most rewarding careers require an investment of time and effort.

But it’s also important to explain to your children that the process itself is rewarding, even though it will involve sacrifices.

Discuss with your children what their hopes and aspirations are.

Help them to dream big and dare to fail – and model for them how you’re doing the same in your own life.

This approach produces the kind of intrinsic motivation and self-discipline that will last a lifetime.

3. Don’t try to control all of their actions

mother and puppet toyIf you want to motivate your children, they need to feel as if they’re in control of their lives.

Being motivated comes from knowing that you can shape your future through the actions you take today.

But if children feel as if their parents are in complete (or almost complete) control, they will have little motivation.

Some parents hover over their children like a helicopter. They micromanage every last detail of their children’s lives.

The result is that the children never develop a sense that they’re responsible for their education and their lives.

By empowering your children, they’ll develop a sense of autonomy and responsibility.

Talk to your children regularly about expectations and consequences.

As a parent, I’m sure you have expectations of your children. For example, you may expect them to keep their room tidy – and there may be consequences for not doing that.

Learning to be responsible in one area (keeping their room tidy) encourages them to be responsible in other areas of life, such as studying.

With this approach, you still need to be involved in your children’s lives. The difference is that instead of hovering and micromanaging, you create boundaries around your involvement.

For example, you can make it clear to your children that you’re available to answer homework-related questions every weeknight between 8 pm and 9 pm.

This way, your children will develop the ability to motivate themselves. They’ll know that they alone are responsible for making sure their homework gets done.

In contrast, consider children whose parents nag them every day to do their homework. Those children won’t develop the ability to motivate themselves.

4. Don’t obsess over the results; emphasise the process instead

The writer Ralph Waldo Emerson once said: “Life is a journey, not a destination.”

This principle applies to study skills and tips as much as it does to life in general.

When motivating your children to do well in school, focus on the process and not the results.

If your children are too focused on results, there’s a danger that when they don’t achieve the results they want, they’ll give up.

What’s more, when we focus only on results, the process becomes a “necessary evil”.

The process becomes something we go through grudgingly because we want a certain result.

But this approach doesn’t encourage a love of learning.

teenage guitaristWe live in an age when learning is a skill that we need to practise throughout our lives. The world is changing faster than ever before. As such, we all need to be continually learning.

And that’s why it’s important to focus on the process, not the results.

Cultivate in your children a love of learning for its own sake, not just as a means to achieve a goal. At the end of the day, achieving goals is a by-product of the systems and processes that we follow.

For example, as a concert pianist, you may have a goal to play Mozart’s Piano Concerto No. 15 in B-flat major without making a single mistake.

The system or process that makes it possible to reach that goal is how often you practise, how you break down and learn difficult cadenzas, and how you incorporate feedback from your music teacher.

When teaching children how to study and how to motivate themselves, it’s vital that you focus on the process and not the outcome.

5. Don’t reduce your child to a problem that needs to be solved

Pre-teens and teens are going through a lot of changes, both physically and mentally.

It’s also a time when they may start displaying problematic behaviours, such as aggression, mood swings, being argumentative, and defying established rules.

As a parent, it’s natural for these kinds of behaviours to become the centre of your attention – they’re problems that you want to solve.

But it’s actually better not to focus on these behaviours.

Instead, try to understand your children’s perspective:

  • How do they feel about the situation?
  • What opinions do they have?

To understand your children better, you’ll need to practise active listening.

Active listening occurs when we give our full attention to what someone is saying.

This means that you aren’t multitasking while your children are talking to you. It means that you aren’t checking your phone or writing a list of things to do.

getting scolded by parentsActive listening means not interrupting your children while they’re talking. It means not judging them or moralising about something they did. It means not offering unsolicited advice.

You can show your children that you’re giving them your full attention by saying things like “go on” and “tell me more”.

Now and again, summarise your understanding of what your children have been saying.

For example, you could say: “It sounds as if there’s a ‘cool’ group of kids in your class, and that you’re feeling excluded by them.”

This indicates to your child that you’re actively listening. It’s also a way of checking that you understand what he or she is saying.

Some parents think that if only they could make their children understand some fundamental principle, the whole problem would disappear.

But often what pre-teens and teens need most is not to understand; they need to feel understood.

When they don’t feel understood, they become defiant.

On the other hand, when they feel understood, it creates a space where they feel safe. And that, in turn, creates an environment where they’re open to looking at the problem in a new light.

How to motivate your teenager to do better in school

Now it’s time to focus on positive behaviour that helps your child feel understood, supported, and encouraged.

Use these strategies to strengthen your connection with your child and teach him or her crucial organisational and planning skills. These healthy habits will help your child in school and beyond.

6. Develop routines and structure

ScheduleRoutines and structure play a crucial role in developing motivation in your children.

Having established routines in family life eliminates a majority of conflicts.

Take homework, for example.

Let’s say you have an established routine that your children do their homework every weeknight between 7 pm and 9 pm.

There won’t be conflicts related to homework, because it’s simply “the way we do things in this family”.

But in a family without routines, ensuring that your children do their homework becomes a daily battle.

Of course, even established routines sometimes need to be reinforced or modified.

For example, now and again you may need to say something like: “When you’ve completed your homework, you can go to Melissa’s house.”

To create a homework routine, it’s a good idea to set up a small part of the house as a study area.

Having a study area that’s free of distractions will help your children develop a homework routine.

It may also help your children if you also devote that period of time to doing your own “homework”. This could be paying bills online, taking an online course, or reading a book to learn about a new topic.

7. Equip your children with planning and organisational skills

As parents, we (hopefully) have planning and organisational skills that we’ve developed over the years.

But we often take these skills for granted, and forget that our children don’t yet have those skills.

Pre-teens and teens can feel overwhelmed, frustrated, and stressed because of the demands they face at school. In response, many of them give up and turn to videos and games as a form of escape.

Some pre-teens and teens might even say they hate school.

But if they have planning and organisational skills, their attitude toward school and academics will be different.

One organisational skill you can teach your children is to break down big tasks into smaller tasks.

Some people call this “chunking down”. This technique makes any task more manageable and doable.

Another skill you can teach your children is list-making. Lists are at the heart of all organisational skills, so this is a great place to start.

You could teach your children how to use a list to pack their bag for a school camp or a school outing.

Planning is another organisational skill that will reduce your children’s stress related to school and exams.

Planning involves placing lists of tasks to be completed within a certain timeframe. This way, your children will learn to complete tasks one by one instead of leaving them until it’s so late that they feel overwhelmed.

For example, if your children have exams coming up, you could teach them how to:

  • Break down their revision material into a series of tasks
  • Use a calendar to plan how they’re going to complete those tasks within a set timeframe

8. Create a family culture where it’s OK to make mistakes

Mistakes are OKWe learn more from our failures than we do from our successes.

Thomas Edison made an extraordinary number of unsuccessful attempts at inventing the electric light bulb.

When a reporter asked him how it felt to fail 1,000 times, Edison replied: “I didn’t fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps.”

Unfortunately, we live in an age that places enormous emphasis on instant success.

Failure isn’t tolerated. Parents correct their children’s homework to improve their grades. They argue with teachers who try to point out areas where their children need to improve.

Yet making mistakes is an essential part of learning.

We must learn from our mistakes and correct them, much like a ship that frequently adjusts its course to stay on the correct bearing.

If you want to motivate your children to study hard and do well in school, one of the best things you can do is create a family culture where it’s OK to make mistakes.

One way to do this is to share with your children your own mistakes and what you learned from them.

For example, maybe you went to university to study one field and ended up switching to a different field when you started work. By sharing that experience with your children, you’re showing them that they don’t have to get it “right” the first time.

If you want to teach your children to love learning, one thing you should avoid at all costs is focusing too much on their failures.

Instead of criticising them for their failures, help them to identify what they’ve learned from their mistakes.

A study by Stanford University has shown that children who are praised for their effort work harder and give up less easily.

On the other hand, children who are afraid of failure are more likely to become discouraged when they make mistakes. Instead of learning from their mistakes and moving on, they’re likely to give up altogether.

9. Show an interest in all aspects of your children’s lives

Parent and teenOne of the keys to motivating your children to do well in school is to show an interest in all aspects of their lives, not just their academics.

If your only concern is how your children are doing in school, they may begin to feel as if they’re being treated as a project instead of as a person.

This can lead to them feeling resentful. And resentment will result in resistance to anything related to studying.

Treat your child as a whole person, not as a project or problem.

Listen to your children when they talk about their interests. Encourage them to get involved in non-school activities, like dance or drama or athletics.

How pre-teens and teens spend their time is crucial to their overall development.

An approach that focuses entirely on studying won’t help your children to develop in a balanced way.

Learning a musical instrument, playing a team sport, and taking an online course on entrepreneurship are all activities that will help your children to develop holistically.

These non-academic activities will give your children a much-needed break from their studies, and will help them to do better as they pursue their long-term academic goals.

10. Help your children to find a mentor

According to research by North Carolina State University, children who have mentors are more likely to become successful.

A mentor is an adult who acts as a role model for your children.

One of the benefits of your children having a mentor is that they will understand a perspective on life from someone who isn’t their parent.

The mentor’s values and attitudes may be similar to yours. It’s much easier to teach values to your children when they’re also modelled by someone outside the family.

One reason for this is that children inevitably become accustomed to their parents’ viewpoints and begin to tune their parents out.

mentorHaving a mentor is a chance for your children to re-engage with those values, from a fresh perspective.

A mentor can be particularly helpful when there’s an ongoing conflict between parents and children.

In this kind of situation, your children can benefit from having a neutral third party they can turn to. The mentor may help your children to see the issues from a new perspective.

So where can you find a mentor for your children?

A mentor could be:

  • A sports coach, art teacher or music teacher
  • A neighbour or family friend
  • One of your co-workers
  • Someone who runs a coaching/mentoring programme (I’m not ashamed to say that I fall into this category of people, because it’s extremely rewarding work)

Conclusion

These ten principles will help you to build in your child a deeper motivation to work hard.

Some of these principles, like establishing routines and structure, may take a while to implement. But other tips and principles you can put into practice right away.

For example, you can start practising active listening today.

I’m confident you’ll start seeing positive results.

(Here’s a link where you can explore more tips on how to motivate a teenager.)

Wishing you all the best on this challenging but meaningful journey!

(If you haven’t already done so, make sure to download your free e-book below.)

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Filed Under: Children, Communication, Education, Learning, Motivation, Parenting, Success, Teens

The Ultimate List of 101 Study Tips for Students

Updated on April 19, 2023 By Daniel Wong 49 Comments

Study tips for students

Have you ever wished you could get inside the minds of straight-A students and learn their best study tips?

If so, keep reading.

In this article, I’m going to share with you the study tips that will enable you to succeed academically.

This list of 101 study tips for students is divided into the following categories:

  • Tips to improve studying attitude and mindset
  • Studying methods and techniques
  • Study tips related to habits and commitments
  • Study tips to enhance focus
  • Tips to get the best academic support
  • Study tips for optimal memory and brain function
  • Tips to improve studying routine and structure

Are you ready?

Let’s dive in!

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Enter your email below to download a step-by-step planning worksheet as a PDF. The planning worksheet will enable you to implement the tips in this article and get better grades!

Tips to improve studying attitude and mindset

Study tips are only effective when you’re in the right frame of mind to use them. Develop the right attitude and mindset for studying to stay motivated and reach your goals.

1. Don’t say “I have to”, and instead say “I get to”

The words you use when you talk to yourself are important. They shape your attitude.

Saying to yourself: “Today, I have to work on this assignment” will produce feelings of stress and frustration.

Instead, try saying to yourself: “Today, I get to work on this assignment.” Saying this will remind you that education is a privilege.

This simple change in attitude will give you more motivation and focus to get the task done.

2. Take full responsibility for your own learning

When you take responsibility for your learning, you’ll become more proactive.

One way to bring about a change in this area is to ask yourself: “If I’m not responsible for my learning, then who is?”

Asking yourself this question will help you to realise that no one else is responsible for your learning – not your teachers, and not your parents.

3. Do more than what others are willing to do

In academics – as in any other area of human endeavour – the students who excel are the ones who are prepared to go the extra mile.

Instead of doing the bare minimum to meet the requirements, do more than what others are willing to do.

This might mean doing two or three more questions than the ones that your teacher assigned.

It might mean looking up additional resources, or it might mean proofreading your essay one final time.

4. Don’t focus on grades too much

As a student, it’s easy to become fixated on grades.

But remember that grades are just a form of feedback; they aren’t an end in themselves.

Don’t allow a focus on grades to cause you to forget that it’s the process of learning that counts in the long run.

5. View challenges positively

Challenges

When you’re learning something new, you’re likely to feel overwhelmed.

When anxiety and stress settle in, students can develop a fear of learning that prevents them from focusing and prioritizing, ultimately hindering their performance.

This is why you must develop what Dr Carol Dweck calls a “growth mindset”.

This means that instead of telling yourself that something is “too hard”, you tell yourself that it’s an opportunity to “grow” your brain.

After all, the more challenges you take on, the more you’ll learn.

6. Write down 3 to 5 reasons why you want to do well academically

One key to succeeding as a student is to be clear about why you want to succeed.

As Jim Rohn once said: “If you have enough reasons, you can do the most incredible things.”

Write down 3 to 5 reasons why you want to perform well in school, and read the list daily.

7. Volunteer and serve others regularly

This will remind you that education never occurs in a vacuum. Education is always about learning from others or passing on that knowledge to others.

By volunteering and serving others, you’ll start to see that your life isn’t mainly about you. It’s about using your skills and knowledge to make the world a better place.

In turn, this will give you the willpower to persevere in the midst of obstacles.

8. Regain your focus by asking these two questions…

The first question is: “What’s important now?”

The second question is: “What’s important next?”

A lack of focus is often the result of trying to do too many things at the same time.

When you find yourself unable to focus, these two questions will bring you back to the present.

9. Use systems and routines

Focus on developing systems and routines, instead of continually thinking about what you want to accomplish.

Students who perform well attribute their success not to lofty goals, but to their daily systems and processes.

The problem with focusing too much on goals is that this doesn’t enable you to connect your goals with the effort required.

Success involves committing to a discipline and a routine, even when the going gets tough.

10. Develop gratitude

Every day, write down at least one thing you’re thankful for.

It’s been shown that students who develop a sense of gratitude are able to harness positive thinking to improve their grades and quality of life.

You can develop your “gratitude muscle” by writing down one thing each day that you’re thankful for.

11. Be a “professional” student

Professional student

When you’re in school, it’s easy to think that you’re just a student. It seems like you don’t have a job or profession yet – that’s why you’re still in school.

But you do have a job: being a “professional” student.

As a professional student, you should take it just as seriously as the job you’ll have when you’ve completed your formal education.

Professional students are responsible, focused and hardworking!

12. Be clear about your purpose

If you lack motivation, think about the purposes of education that are bigger than yourself.

Remember that the purpose of education is less about you and more about the contribution you can make to society.

With a strong sense of purpose, you’ll be more committed.

This is one of the most crucial study tips for students that will always be relevant.

13. Don’t blame others

Resist the urge to blame your teachers, parents, etc.

If things go wrong, remind yourself that your academics are your responsibility, not anyone else’s.

Studying methods and techniques

Different learning methods can improve your understanding and help you retain more information. Try these tips for studying to engage different parts of your brain and make studying more fun.

14. Vocalise to memorise

When trying to memorise key information or equations, say it out loud.

This study found that saying information out loud helps to move it to your long-term memory.

15. Create summary notes

Create summary notes of each chapter or topic you’re learning.

Condensing each chapter into a handful of key points will make it easier for you to consolidate your learning.

16. Take a study break every 30 to 45 minutes

Research shows that even brief diversions can dramatically increase your ability to focus.

Even if it’s a break of just a few minutes, your concentration will improve.

17. Use the Pomodoro Technique

Pomodoro technique for students

If you can’t focus for 30 to 45 minutes straight, try the Pomodoro Technique instead.

(“Pomodoro” is the Italian word for “tomato”.)

The Pomodoro Technique is a way of studying in short bursts. Study in blocks of 25 minutes, with a 5-minute break in between blocks.

Once you’ve completed four blocks of 25 minutes, take a break of 15 to 30 minutes.

18. Test yourself often

Another useful study tip is to test yourself at regular intervals on what you’ve been learning.

This not only enables you to consolidate the new information, but it also ensures that you’re mastering the material.

19. Break tasks down

Break down overwhelming tasks into smaller, more manageable ones.

By doing this, you’ll feel more motivated to do your work and to study. You’ll also be less likely to feel discouraged or anxious.

Overall, you’ll become a far more productive student.

20. Keep a “done” list

As you complete the tasks on your list, check them off as “done”.

Keep this list for future reference.

Keeping a “done” list will give you a sense of accomplishment. As such, you’ll feel more productive, which will lead to you getting more done in the long run.

21. Give yourself a reward

Give yourself a reward – even a small one works – for each task you complete.

This serves as a reminder that you’re making progress. This will enable you to sustain your focus over the weeks and months.

22. Keep a list of the doubts and questions you have

Keep a running list of any doubts or questions that arise during your study sessions.

By noting them down, you won’t feel as if you have to remember them. This will free up your mind and allow you to concentrate better on the material you’re studying.

Once you have a chance, clarify your doubts with your teacher.

If your teacher isn’t available, then look for a suitable online resource instead.

23. Set tiny goals

If you find yourself procrastinating, set tiny goals.

The objective is to get started, which is always the hardest part of getting the work done.

For example, your goal for the next 15 minutes might be to read and summarise one page of a textbook (instead of the whole chapter).

In terms of the study tips for students that I recommend, this is an exceptionally practical one.

24. Make the material interesting by asking the right questions

Make the material interesting by asking questions such as:

  • Who developed this theory?
  • How did he or she develop this theory?
  • What challenges did he or she face?
  • What are the applications of this theory?

25. To improve your writing, use the Hemingway App

The Hemingway App checks your writing for overly complex sentences, as well as other common writing errors.

I use the app every time I write articles, and it has enabled me to correct many of my bad writing habits.

26. Never memorise information without first understanding it

Understand information

The human brain is designed to process information, not to store information like it’s a hard drive.

This is why meaningful learning is far more effective than rote learning.

Meaningful learning happens when you understand the information and make sense of it.

If you don’t understand the material after reading through it several times, don’t be afraid to ask for assistance.

27. Take practice tests under test conditions

This will help to ensure that you understand what you’re learning.

By taking the tests under test conditions, it will also prepare you for the exam stress that you’ll face.

28. Explain the concept to someone else

An excellent way to master a complex topic is to explain it to someone else.

Through the act of explaining the topic to another person, you’ll get a better understanding of the topic.

If you can’t explain the concept in a simple way, it means that you probably haven’t mastered the concept yet.

29. Read the syllabus carefully

The syllabus is the scope of a subject or an outline of the topics covered in a particular course.

Don’t assume that you know the syllabus based on what material your teacher has been covering.

Read the syllabus for yourself so that you know exactly what topics will be tested.

This will make it easier for you to be well prepared for every test and exam.

30. Become familiar with the structure of the test or exam

While you won’t know the exact questions that will appear in a test or exam, your teacher should be able to tell you about the structure of the test or exam.

Having this information will allow you to be more specific in the way you prepare. In turn, this will enable you to get better grades.

31. Use free online resources

If you have trouble understanding the material, use free online resources like Khan Academy to learn the information.

32. Participate in class

Actively participating in class will help you to engage with the subject matter.

This will deepen your interest in the topic and allow you to learn the concepts more effectively.

33. Cultivate the habit of reading for leisure

Reading

Develop the habit of reading as a pastime.

Try reading both fiction and non-fiction books. I recommend reading biographies in particular as they tend to be inspirational.

By cultivating this habit, you’ll associate reading with something that’s enjoyable, rather than as something that you’re forced to do.

As such, you’ll be a happier and better student.

34. Set “focused attention” goals

If you think your teacher is especially boring, set “focused attention” goals.

Focus for 5 minutes, then take a 3-minute break. Repeat this until the class ends.

The following week, focus for 7 minutes at a go before taking a 3-minute break. As the weeks go by, increase the “focus” periods gradually.

This may not seem ideal, but it’s better than not paying attention at all.

Over time, you’ll be able to focus for longer stretches, even if your teacher is boring.

35. Before writing an essay or paper, create an outline first

Having an outline will make it possible for you to write better essays in less time.

The outline doesn’t have to be that detailed; just list the bullet points that summarise what you want to write about.

36. Write down every single resource you could use to prepare for a test or exam

By doing this, you’ll ensure that you don’t overlook any vital resources that will facilitate your preparation for the test or exam.

37. After you finish studying a set of notes, write down the date when you studied it

This will allow you to keep track of when you studied a particular topic.

As such, you’ll know when you ought to do a more thorough review of the topic, and when a more cursory review will suffice.

38. Make your notes visually appealing

Notes

For example, you could use different colours for different sub-topics, use headings and sub-headings, or add diagrams to illustrate key points.

In addition, you could create mind maps to represent the connections between different concepts and ideas.

When your notes are visually appealing, it will make your study sessions more interesting and satisfying.

39. To improve your writing, ask your teachers if you can submit additional essays

Most teachers will agree to this request.

By submitting additional essays, you’ll have more practice and more opportunities for feedback.

As a result, you’ll become a better writer.

40. Use a stopwatch

Use a stopwatch to time your study sessions and breaks.

This will enable you to stay on task and ensure that a 10-minute break doesn’t turn into a 2-hour break.

41. Complete unpleasant tasks first

This accomplishes two things.

Firstly, it gets you in the mindset where you’re not hiding from your challenges. Instead, you’re facing them head-on.

Secondly, having dealt with the unpleasant tasks first, they’ll no longer be hanging over your head. This means that you’ll maintain your levels of productivity.

42. When taking notes, write down only the key points

When taking notes during class, never try to write down everything the teacher says – you won’t be able to.

Instead, write down keywords or key points. By summarising the concepts in your own words, you’ll deepen your understanding of the topic.

43. Increase your reading speed

Increase your reading speed by using an online tool like Spreeder.

Learning to read faster allows you to take control of information overload, save time, and become a more effective student.

This isn’t just a study tip that I recommend to students; it’s a life skill.

44. Take notes by hand instead of on your computer

Research shows that taking notes on a computer results in shallower processing and understanding of the material as compared to taking notes by hand.

45. If you don’t feel like getting to work, set a timer for just 3 minutes

Timer

By doing this, you’re setting a goal to work for just 3 minutes.

Setting such a low target will push you to get started.

In this way, you’ll be less likely to procrastinate on school-related tasks.

You’ll probably find that you’ll keep going beyond those 3 minutes.

46. Use your finger or pen as a guide whenever you’re reading

This video shows you how to do this.

Combining a physical action with the act of reading will enable you to concentrate for longer.

You’ll daydream less, thus improving your studying efficiency.

Study tips related to habits and commitments

When good study habits become part of your daily routine, success happens naturally. Commit to cultivating these habits, while you also pay attention to the poor study habits you want to avoid or change.

47. Check through your homework at least once before you submit it

By doing this, you’ll almost always find at least one or two mistakes that would otherwise have gone uncorrected.

48. Submit 100% of your homework on time

Make this a personal commitment, because it’s your responsibility as a student.

You’ll be surprised at how quickly it becomes a studying-related habit that you’re unwilling to break.

49. To form new healthy study habits, make use of technology

Develop new study habits using apps like Habitica and HabitBull.

These apps help you to keep track of the new habits you’re trying to develop.

They also turn the habit formation process into an enjoyable one.

50. Before starting on a homework assignment, read through your notes

Don’t assume that you’ve already mastered the topic, even before doing the homework assignment.

The act of reading your notes will jog your memory and make doing the homework a more meaningful learning process.

51. Review any new information learned on the same day

Review information

Review and consolidate any new information on the same day that you learned it.

This will ensure that you understand the information and will make it easier for you to move the new information to your long-term memory.

In the long run, you won’t need to spend so much time studying to master the material.

52. Take notes during every class

Research shows that we forget about 40% of new information learned over the subsequent 24 hours.

Taking notes helps you to retain more information, and also helps you to concentrate during class.

53. Do plenty of practice tests and exams

Do practice tests and exams at regular intervals.

This will allow you to gauge whether or not you’re mastering the topics and concepts.

Another form of practice that can be fun is the Feynman technique. Try this out with a classmate or a friend.

54. Don’t cram for tests or exams

Cramming is what happens when you leave your studying to the last minute.

Not surprisingly, 90% of students report that learning is more effective when it’s spaced out, as opposed to cramming.

So be consistent and don’t cram!

55. Prepare for every class

Do the recommended readings before each class.

If you know what your teacher will be covering in the upcoming class, skim the relevant textbook chapter to get an idea of what the class will be about.

56. Pay attention in class, even if you already understand the material

If you already know the concepts well, treat the class as a review session.

You’ll consolidate your learning and retain the information for longer.

57. Decide specifically when you’ll start studying for every test and exam

Mark the date on your calendar, because this will make it much more likely that you’ll start studying on that day.

Don’t just make a vague commitment that you’ll start studying “early” – we all know that doesn’t work.

58. Complete all of your homework the day it is assigned, as far as possible

Doing homework

Do your best to keep this commitment.

Use the fun things you want to do as a reward for completing your homework – you’ll enjoy them more for having first completed your assignments.

What’s more, the undone homework assignments won’t pile up and cause you unnecessary stress.

59. After every test and exam, analyse how you can improve in the future

After you’ve received your graded test or exam, look through it carefully.

Ask yourself questions such as:

  • Which topics do I know well?
  • Which topics do I not know so well?
  • What avoidable mistakes did I make?
  • How can I ensure that I don’t make these mistakes in the future?
  • What do I need to do differently to better prepare for the next test or exam?

60. Don’t rely on your memory

Nobody’s memory is perfect, so write things down.

I encourage you to write down every single thing that you want to remember, e.g. homework assignments, deadlines, events, ideas, key concepts.

Don’t leave it to chance.

Of the study tips for students mentioned in this article, this is one of the simplest but most powerful ones.

61. Never skip classes

Don’t skip classes, even if you think the class is “useless”.

Missing classes can quickly turn into a bad habit. And besides, it’s not worth it.

When you consider the amount of time you’ll spend catching up on what you missed, you might as well have attended the class in the first place.

62. Proofread every essay you write

A few spelling errors will ruin even the most brilliant essay.

And don’t rely too much on a spell-checker.

Your essay may contain words that are spelled correctly but are nevertheless errors, such as “there” instead of “their”, or “form” instead of “from”.

63. Do filing at least once a week

Binders

Organisation is a crucial part of becoming a successful student.

Not being able to find key information when you need it will make you waste precious time.

As such, I recommend that you file your notes, assignments, etc. at least once a week.

Make an appointment with yourself to do your filing on the same day each week, so you’ll be more likely to do it.

64. Don’t study or do work on your bed

It’s essential that the place where you study isn’t the same place where you sleep.

Your bed might be the most comfortable place to be in, but you’ll feel sleepy while studying. You may even end up taking a nap when you didn’t intend to!

65. Pre-commit to the habits that you want to develop

Pre-commitment is the act of making it impossible for you to allow a lack of willpower to get in the way of positive behavioural change.

For example, you could ask your parents to take away your phone or tablet every evening at 6pm. This would ensure that you’ll be more focused when you study in the evening.

Another example would be booking a study room at the library so that you and your friends can study together. This way, you won’t forego the study session.

List the positive habits you want to develop as a student, and think about ways to pre-commit to them.

66. Make full use of your travel time

On the train ride home, for example, you can review what you learned earlier that day in school.

Or you could make use of the bus ride home to plan what tasks you intend to complete by the end of the day.

By making the most of your travel time, you’ll have more time to do the things you enjoy.

67. Sit at the front of the class whenever possible

Research has shown that when students are randomly assigned to different seats in a classroom, the ones who sit at the front get better grades.

Sitting at the front of the class makes it easier for you to stay focused, and makes it less likely that you’ll fall asleep in class.

Study tips to enhance focus

Don’t let distractions and a lack of focus get in your way. These are the best study tips to create a distraction-free environment.

68. Create an area that is conducive to studying

Before you begin a study session, make sure that you have easy access to everything you need, e.g. textbooks, writing paper, stationery.

Adjust the lighting so that it’s comfortable for reading.

Also, make sure the temperature is right. Research shows that the temperature most conducive to studying is roughly 22.0°C (71.6°F).

69. When you feel like you’re about to get distracted, write down the distraction

For example, if you’re in the middle of a study session and you suddenly feel like watching a YouTube video, write down “YouTube” on a sheet of paper.

This is a way of saying to your brain: “I’ll come back to that later.”

It will give you a sense of release from the distraction and leave you free to focus on the present task.

During your next break, you can indulge in that distraction.

70. Get rid of all distractions before you start studying

Focus

Put your phone and tablet on “silent”.

Even better, put them in another room.

I recommend that you use a tool like Freedom to prevent you from accessing distracting apps and websites during study sessions.

If you’re a distracted student, you won’t be an effective student.

So take this tip seriously!

71. If you start worrying while studying, write down your worries

If you find yourself worrying excessively before a test or exam, write down your worries on a piece of paper.

Research by the University of Chicago has shown that this exercise allows students to relieve their anxieties.

This, in turn, leads to students getting better grades.

72. Never study while watching TV, videos, etc.

Don’t attempt to study with TV or videos playing in the background.

Don’t scroll through your social media feed while trying to get some work done, either.

In other words, don’t multitask.

To have a fruitful study session, you need to remove all external stimuli that take your focus away from the task at hand.

73. Tell your family and friends when you’ll be studying

When your family members and friends know when you’ll be studying, they won’t interrupt or distract you.

74. If you’re too busy, make a list of your commitments

Review this list and eliminate those commitments that are less important.

Remind yourself that it’s impossible to do everything in life; you need to focus.

By prioritising, you’ll carve out more time to study and to do other meaningful things.

Prioritisation is a key time management principle for students to apply!

75. Use earplugs to block out noise

If noise from your surroundings – such as traffic, people talking, or dogs barking – is distracting you, use earplugs to create your own “quiet zone”.

76. Listen to classical music while studying

Classical music

If you don’t like to study in silence, play classical music in the background.

Research indicates that listening to classical music while studying can help you to retain information.

Here are 10 recommended pieces by composers such as Mozart, Brahms, and Bach.

77. Listen to white noise while studying

This is an alternative, in case you’re not a fan of classical music.

Research from the University of Chicago has shown that we think better and are more creative when there’s a moderate level of background noise.

Coffitivity and Hipstersound are two tools you can check out for suitable white noise to listen to while doing work.

Tips to get the best academic support

A strong support system will help you stay on track. Plus, having the right people around you will help you study more effectively.

78. Study with motivated friends

There are powerful benefits related to studying in a group.

One benefit is that it makes you accountable to a group of friends who expect you to show up to study sessions.

Another benefit is that you can share notes. When you do this, you’ll be able to see how other students take notes, which will enable you to improve your own note-taking skills.

79. Don’t be afraid or too proud to ask for help

If you need assistance, ask for it.

A study by Saint Louis University researchers found that students who ask for help are more likely to get A’s.

This isn’t a surprising finding. What is surprising is that the study also found that fewer than 1 in 5 students ask their instructors for help.

80. Ask your teachers for additional feedback

Ask your teachers for additional feedback, especially when all the feedback you’ve received is what letter grade you got.

This is especially so for essays.

The more feedback you get, the easier it will be for you to focus on improving specific areas of knowledge.

Most teachers will be more than happy to provide you with additional feedback.

81. Work with an academic coach

If you’re wondering how to deal with bad grades or with a lack of motivation, get guidance from an academic coach.

An educational coach can help you to pinpoint the root causes of problems and suggest solutions.

I work with pre-teens and teens 1-to-1 through this coaching programme (it’s about life coaching and much more). In this programme, I equip them to become motivated, disciplined, responsible and resilient.

Study tips for optimal memory and brain function

You’re in the best position to learn when your brain is healthy, rested, and calm. Use these strategies to optimise your brain function and memory, and you’ll learn faster.

82. Do deep breathing exercises

Do deep breathing exercises for just a few minutes every day to improve your brain function and focus.

Researchers found that focused deep breathing raises levels of noradrenaline (also called norepinephrine). Noradrenaline is a neurotransmitter that increases your alertness.

83. Get at least 8 hours of sleep every night

Sleep

This research highlights the vital role that sleep plays in processing information.

The study found that during “slow wave” sleep, the brain replays information learned while awake.

This results in the consolidation of information and memories, and moves them into long-term storage.

Losing sleep means losing time for this consolidation process to occur. So if you want to study effectively, get at least 8 hours of sleep every night.

There are so many study tips for students in this article, but I encourage you to put this one into practice as a priority.

84. Exercise regularly

Research by Harvard Medical School shows that exercise improves learning by encouraging nerve cells to bind to one another. This is the cellular basis for learning new information.

Do your best to get at least 15 to 30 minutes of exercise daily.

85. Drink plenty of water

Research has shown that water consumption improves cognitive performance and information processing in both children and adults.

86. Use mnemonics to improve your memory

A mnemonic is a memory system that links certain words to specific information, like an anchor.

For instance, you could use the phrase “Super Man Helps Every One” to remember the order of the Great Lakes from west to east (Superior, Michigan, Huron, Erie, Ontario).

Create your own mnemonics to memorise “sequential” information you encounter across your various subjects.

87. Use images and sounds to improve your memory

Use the visualisation and association technique to link vivid mental images with concepts or facts that you want to remember.

This is far more effective than just trying to memorise the information without using a specific memory technique.

88. Develop healthy eating habits

Healthy eating

Research from the University of Melbourne shows that high fat and high sugar diets have a negative impact on learning, memory, and information processing.

This means that a diet that’s good for your body is good for your brain.

If you want to do well in school, you must go the extra mile in terms of taking care of your physical health too.

89. Eat foods rich in omega-3 fatty acids

Research shows that test anxiety can be improved by eating foods high in omega-3 and -6 fatty acids.

These foods include salmon, flaxseed and walnuts.

90. Don’t rely on energy drinks or caffeine to stay awake

If you’re tired, the only real remedy is a good night’s sleep.

Over time, energy drinks won’t give you the boost that you’re hoping for.

Like coffee, they’ll disrupt your sleep cycle, which will only make the situation worse.

91. Train your brain

Use an online tool like BrainHQ, which will give your brain a workout in areas such as attention, memory, navigation, and intelligence.

Tips to improve studying routines and structure

As a student, you need to stay organised and manage your time well. These study tips will enable you to create structure and routine in your life, so you’ll never have to cram the night before an exam.

92. Use technology to organise your student life

For example, MyStudyLife is an app that keeps track of your tasks, in addition to your schedule and timetable.

Such apps make it far easier for students to stay organised.

93. Keep a time log

Time log

Keep a time log so that you can see how much time you’re spending on different tasks. You’ll be surprised at the results!

Keep the log for at least three days, writing down every single thing you do each day.

By reviewing your time log, you’ll be able to minimise or eliminate low-value activities.

This will allow you to spend more time doing high-value work, while still having the same amount of free time.

94. Create a daily plan for each day

Create a daily plan for each day, so that you’ll know your priorities in terms of which tasks you’ll work on.

Without a plan, the days’ distractions will quickly take over. A plan reminds you what it is you want to achieve and how you’re going to achieve it.

95. Create a weekly schedule

Creating a weekly schedule gives you the structure needed to be a productive student.

Set aside time in your schedule for the things that are most important to you, e.g. family time, religious activities, school activities.

When you’ve created a weekly schedule, you’ll rely more on your schedule to get things done, instead of waiting to feel “motivated”.

96. Block out time for studying

On your calendar, block out the periods that you intend to spend studying.

Colour-code the blocks of time to indicate different subjects or studying-related activities.

This is a representation of your commitment to be a focused and effective student.

97. Use a calendar or planner and keep it with you at all times

In this way, you’ll be able to update your calendar or planner when changes come up – which is bound to happen.

With an updated schedule, you’ll be a more organised and productive student.

98. Do a weekly review

At the end of each week, review how your week went.

Here are some questions you can ask yourself:

  • How many of your scheduled tasks did you complete?
  • Were there any obstacles that prevented you from focusing?
  • How will you ensure that next week will be a fruitful one?

Reviewing your progress each week allows you to fine-tune your study schedule.

99. Set boundaries for social activities

To perform well in school, you must balance your academics with your social life.

Now, I’m not saying that you shouldn’t have a social life at all. I’m a firm believer that it’s important to lead a balanced life.

But not all your friends will have the same level of commitment to their academics that you do.

So you need to be clear about your own guidelines, as you’ll encounter peer pressure to do what your friends are doing.

For instance, you might decide that you won’t go out with your friends more than once a week. You might also set boundaries related to who you choose to hang out with.

100. Develop a plan for every upcoming test and exam

Set a date for when you’ll start studying for the test or exam.

Make a list of the topics and sub-topics that you need to cover. Set aside time each week to study, and write down what you’ll do to prepare for the test or exam.

101. At the end of each day, take a few minutes to reflect

Thinking and reflecting

Ask yourself questions such as:

  • What went well?
  • What didn’t go so well?
  • Did you make the right decisions related to your friendships, academics, family, etc.?
  • What adjustments do you need to make going forward?
  • What new habits do you need to form?
  • What bad habits do you need to eliminate?

Conclusion

At over 5,000 words, this is a very long article filled with study tips for students.

Great job making it to the end of the article!

Rest assured that there’s no need to implement every single study tip right away. That would be too overwhelming.

(To develop a structured plan to put the tips into practice, download the free planning worksheet below.)

I hope this article has given you a sense of clarity, focus and purpose as you strive to be the best student you can be.

Wishing you all the best on this challenging and rewarding journey!

Like this article? Please share it with your friends.

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Filed Under: Discipline, Education, Learning, Success, Taking action, Teens, Time Management

Parents, Stop Telling Your Kids to Study Hard for Their Own Good (And What to Do Instead)

Updated on January 6, 2026 By Daniel Wong 45 Comments

Parent and child

Yes, it is for your kids’ own good that they study hard.

But you shouldn’t tell them that.

Why not?

Because if you do, they’ll be less likely to study hard.

(I’ve spoken to and worked with more than 20,000 students, so I say this with confidence.)

In this article, I’ll provide an explanation.

I’ll also share three tips to help your kids develop intrinsic motivation.

(Don’t forget to download your free e-book below.)

FREE E-BOOK:

16 Keys to Motivating Your Teenager (Cover)

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Don’t expect your kids to get an education in school

This might sound strange, so hear me out.

We live in a world where knowledge abounds.

It’s incredible that most of this knowledge is available for free online – you just have to seek it out.

A couple of decades ago, to get an education you had almost no choice but to attend school.

But today, you can take courses on Khan Academy, Coursera, Udacity, Udemy, and other websites.

If you’re diligent about taking these courses, you’d acquire more skills and knowledge than you would in almost any traditional school.

This means that, over time, the diplomas and degrees that schools give out will matter less.

It also means that students shouldn’t go to school expecting to get an education. Rather, school should form just one part of a student’s education.

In the future, diplomas and degrees won’t be the ticket to a well-paying job and a comfortable life. (This is already starting to be the case.)

But for now, such certificates still matter.

Statistics show that students who perform better in school are more likely to get jobs that pay better.

And students who study hard are obviously more likely to perform well in school.

Which means that if you want to motivate your kids, you should tell them to work hard in school for their own benefit, right?

Wrong.

Allow me to explain.

3 reasons it’s ineffective to tell your kids to study hard for their own good

Reason #1: Students today aren’t hungry for a “better life”

Teenager listening to music

In developed countries today, most children and teenagers have more material things than they need.

More toys than they need.

More shoes than they need.

More clothes than they need.

More electronic devices than they need.

In contrast, one or two generations ago, most people experienced real hardship.

For example, my parents and grandparents grew up with far less (materially speaking) than I did.

From an early age, it was obvious to my parents that if they wanted to have a more comfortable life in the future, they needed to work hard in school.

Their teachers and parents told them that education was the key to success – and in that era, it was true.

Today, young people already lead lives of comfort, if not luxury.

Not all of them realise this, but some do.

For example, I know a student who dropped out of school at the age of 14 because she hated everything about school.

No matter what her parents said, she refused to go to school.

In a moment of reflection, she said, “You know, I’m not doing anything productive with my life. But my life is still pretty good. I have a smartphone, I have access to the Internet, I have a nice bed to sleep in, and I have air conditioning at home.”

If you live in a developed country, I’m guessing that your kids experience a similar level of material comfort as this 14-year-old girl.

Children and teenagers can’t imagine life without these comforts.

As such, they subconsciously assume that their life will continue to be comfortable, regardless of how hard they try in school.

I’ve worked with a few unmotivated teenagers who said to me: “I’ve already calculated how much my inheritance will be. I don’t think I’ll need to work a day in my life.”

I was in disbelief when I heard this.

It was almost as if these students were wishing death upon their parents so they could get their inheritance!

But it just goes to show that many young people assume they won’t need to work hard to maintain their current standard of living.

Because they’ve grown up with so much, they don’t feel the need to work hard so they can own even more “nice” things. They already own plenty of nice things!

This means that the desire to achieve more doesn’t motivate them to study hard in the same way it motivated people one or two generations ago.

This is the first reason why telling your kids to study hard so they can have a “better life” isn’t effective.

Reason #2: Students desperately want to feel as if their lives are significant, but studying doesn’t help them to feel this way

Unhappy student

Through my interactions with thousands of students around the world, I’ve come to realise that they all want to feel as if they’re contributing.

When they feel as if they’re contributing, they also feel as if their lives are significant. This is an observation that’s backed up by research.

This, in turn, enables them to be more motivated and purpose-driven overall.

What does this have to do with studying hard?

Plenty.

The direct message students receive in school is that they should study hard to get good grades, so that they’ll be able to get a good job, so that they’ll be able to enjoy a comfortable life (which they are probably already enjoying).

The indirect message students receive is that they won’t make a real contribution until after they’ve completed their formal education.

What’s more, schools tend to emphasise achievement, both in academics and other activities.

But what young people crave is a sense that they’re contributing, that their lives are useful to others.

Students say to me, “If I study hard, I get A’s. If I don’t study hard, I get D’s. Either way, nothing about the world really changes.”

This statement bears more truth than parents and educators would like to admit.

It highlights the fact that students want to make an impact, no matter their age.

When they don’t have this sense of significance, they turn to social media and games.

Through these platforms, they can build a following, get “likes”, gain admiration for their looks and abilities, and “level up” their characters.

They get a real sense of significance and achievement in the online world, which they might not be able to get in the real world.

Social media and games are entertaining, but they also serve to help young people meet their real needs in a virtual way.

This is a big reason why millions of teenagers around the world are so addicted to their phones.

In summary, there’s no point telling your kids to study hard for their own good. This is because studying doesn’t give them the sense of significance they so desperately want and need.

Reason #3: The rewards of studying hard are too far in the future

Students taking exam

As mentioned earlier, schools tell students the story that they should study hard and do their homework, so they can eventually get a diploma or degree. Thereafter, they can get a well-paying job.

To students, this isn’t an inspiring story.

In addition, for many students, they’re only likely to complete their schooling in 5, 10 or 15 years.

If you ask children or teenagers to wait just one year to get a new phone or game or pet, that already seems like an eternity to them.

But we’re expecting students to work hard in school for the next 5, 10 or 15 years because of the reward they’ll get at the end of the journey?

That’s not going to happen – especially not when young people are growing up in an age of instant gratification.

Even the least motivated students I’ve worked with understand that it’s for their own good that they study hard.

But the benefits that students will reap are too far down the road to keep them motivated.

3 tips to help your kids become self-motivated students

Now that we’ve talked about the three reasons why you shouldn’t tell your kids to study hard for their own good, it’s now time to talk about the alternative approaches that work.

Here are three tips to help your kids develop intrinsic motivation:

Tip #1: Focus more on contribution and less on achievement

Volunteer

One important purpose of education is to equip students with the knowledge and skills so they can make a contribution.

Contribution is the foundation of a meaningful life and of intrinsic motivation.

That’s why it’s especially unfortunate that students rarely think about how they can contribute.

Instead, they’re continually thinking about what they want to – or are “supposed” to – achieve. This leaves them feeling unmotivated and uninspired.

What’s the alternative?

To emphasise contribution above achievement.

Do this in the way you speak to your kids about what goes on in their lives.

Help them to see that there are always ways in which they can help and serve others.

Take practical steps to communicate this message too.

For example, as a family you could get involved in a fortnightly or monthly volunteering activity, such as:

  • Helping out at a soup kitchen
  • Tutoring younger children
  • Doing charity work

I’ve found that students who engage in such activities voluntarily at least a couple of times a month become more aware of their responsibilities toward others.

This helps them to adopt a more positive mindset when it comes to fulfilling their responsibilities as a student.

There’s no point forcing your kids to volunteer if they refuse to, but you can always start by setting a good example for them.

Even at home, there are many ways for your kids to contribute.

For example, they can…

  • Help out with chores
  • Cook a simple meal for the family once a week
  • Plan family celebrations
  • Suggest the itinerary for an upcoming family vacation

Overall, I encourage you to move away from the idea that students should only focus on their studies.

If students lead balanced lives that are centred on others, their motivation to acquire knowledge for the benefit of others will increase as well.

Tip #2: Focus more on the process and less on the outcome

Process

Instead of asking your kids what grades they’re getting, turn your attention toward the process by asking questions such as:

  • “What did you try hard at?”
  • “What risks did you take?”
  • “What did you fail at?”
  • “What challenges did you face?”
  • “What will you do differently next time?”

Share with your kids the challenges you face, and what you’re doing to overcome those challenges.

This approach will remind your kids that the process is what matters, not the outcome.

Emphasise to them that grades are just a form of feedback, and that grades are never an end in themselves.

As the research shows, students who embrace this mindset are more likely to be successful in school and beyond.

Tip #3: Create a culture of learning at home

Books

As a parent, you’re the leader of the home.

Your kids are watching you, so if you lead by example they’ll be more likely to develop a positive learning attitude.

Periodically share with your kids…

  • What books you’ve been reading (here are my recommendations for the best books for students)
  • What documentaries you’ve been watching
  • What courses you’ve been taking
  • What challenges you’ve been facing in your personal and professional life
  • What fears you’ve been overcoming
  • What skills you’ve been learning
  • What character traits you’ve been developing

If you do this in a non-preachy way, your kids will internalise the message that learning is fun.

More importantly, they’ll understand that getting better is its own reward.

And when they believe this for themselves, they’ll study hard because they’ll enjoy the process of learning and improving.

Conclusion

As we wrap up, take a minute to think about the long-term goals you have for your kids.

These goals are probably aligned with many – if not all – of the following statements:

  • I want them to be kind
  • I want them to be courageous
  • I want them to be generous
  • I want them to be resilient
  • I want them to be grateful
  • I want them to be trustworthy
  • I want them to be respectful
  • I want them to be people of integrity
  • I want them to love learning
  • I want them to find fulfilment
  • I want them to be passionate about serving and helping others
  • I want them to build meaningful relationships
  • I want them to contribute to their communities
  • I want them to lead lives of purpose

Yet somewhere along the way, you may have lost sight of these goals. You may have started to focus on what’s urgent, instead of what’s important.

(As a parent myself, I know it’s so easy to!)

It’s natural for parents to want their kids to perform well in school.

But I encourage you to aim higher than just getting your kids to study hard.

By applying Tips #1, #2 and #3, your kids will be more likely to head down the path of becoming people of character, contribution and commitment.

Then you won’t even need to remind them to study hard!

This transformational journey will take effort – both from you and your kids – but it’ll be worth it.

(If you haven’t already done so, make sure to download your free e-book below.)

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Filed Under: Children, Education, Learning, Parenting, Perspective, Success, Teens

Are Teenagers Sleeping Enough? 10 Ways Parents Can Help

Updated on January 6, 2026 By Daniel Wong 4 Comments

Sleeping teen

Note from Daniel: This is a guest post by Sarah Cummings.

For many teenagers, sleeping enough is low on their list of priorities.

Does your teen get enough sleep?

Probably not.

Scientists recommend that teens get more sleep per night than adults, but many of them get less.

In fact, around 85% of teens are sleep deprived.

As parents, we should take this fact seriously, because sleep is important for physical health, brain function and learning.

So here are 10 tips for parents to help teens get a better night’s sleep…

(Don’t forget to download your free e-book below.)

FREE E-BOOK:

16 Keys to Motivating Your Teenager (Cover)

Get your FREE copy of

16 Keys to Motivating Your Teenager.


The e-book has already been downloaded by many thousands of parents, so don't miss out!

1. Respect your teens’ different rhythms

Teens experience a shift in their circadian rhythms, because of a delayed release of melatonin compared to adults.

Because of this shift, they may not get sleepy until later than you do.

This is also the reason for teenagers sleeping in whenever they can.

Based on their natural circadian rhythm, they might not go to bed until midnight. If they get the full dose of their recommended hours in, this will cause them to sleep in until 9 am or 10 am.

Of course, this sleep schedule doesn’t work during school days. So they’ll need to shift their sleep schedule gradually – which is what we’ll talk about next.

2. Establish a routine

Talk to your teens and create a routine that you’re both agreeable to.

If your teens are sleeping too late on school nights, the changes need to be made little by little.

If they’re used to going to bed at 1 am, they won’t suddenly be able to fall asleep at 9:30 pm.

As such, you can try to shift their bedtime forward gradually, e.g. 10 minutes earlier each day.

Once your teens are going to bed at the ideal time, try to ensure that they stick to this bedtime during the week and on weekends, too (or as close to it as possible).

This way, their sleeping patterns won’t be affected too much.

What time should teens go to bed? Early enough to get at least 7 to 9 hours of sleep on a school day.

If your teens don’t sleep enough on weekdays, they’ll accumulate “sleep debt”. This will make them more likely to break out in pimples, since insufficient sleep is linked to acne and other forms of skin irritation.

Furthermore, the more sleep debt they accumulate, the more likely they are to fall victim to a long list of health problems.

3. Have a grown-up discussion with your teens

Mother and teen daughter

All this talk of bedtimes can be dangerous territory.

Your teens might think that you’re being overbearing or naggy, or that you don’t know what you’re talking about.

If you don’t handle the situation well, they may become defiant.

But it’s important that your teens know just how crucial sleep is to their health and wellbeing.

They should know what constitutes a great sleep, what can result in a bad one, and what measures they can take to sleep well on a consistent basis.

You could use your own experience as a starting point. For instance, you could mention how you couldn’t concentrate at work because you slept badly the previous night.

You could also subtly draw their attention to articles on the link between screen time and sleep deprivation.

Or you could express your concerns that they’re not sleeping enough, without lecturing or nagging them.

Ask them what they think might be the cause of it, and ask them what solutions they might have.

Allow them to take ownership of the situation, and you’ll be pleasantly surprised.

4. Move electronic devices out of the bedroom

To promote a more relaxing, nurturing sleep environment for your teens, TVs, laptops, phones and tablets should ideally be kept out of the bedroom.

The blue light that these devices emit hinders the body’s natural production of melatonin, which is the hormone that affects our sleep cycles.

When there’s less melatonin in the body, it’s harder to fall asleep and stay asleep.

This explains why teenagers sleeping with phones and laptops in their bedrooms often don’t get enough sleep.

But how should you introduce this “screen detox”?

Turn it into a family activity.

Tell your teens that you’ll be taking part in the screen detox as well, and share with them how it will be hard for you too.

If they aren’t open to this idea, implement it gradually.

You could start with just one day a week, and increase it by one day each week.

5. Use technology as an aid

I know I just said that screen time can prevent teenagers from sleeping enough. So hear me out.

There are some great apps out there that can reduce the harmful effects of blue light.

Apps or features like Night Shift (for iOS), Twilight (for Android) and f.lux (for computers) filter out blue light.

This means that screen time won’t have the same damaging effect as in the case that these apps or features aren’t activated.

The good news is that they’re all available for free!

6. Introduce sleep-promoting foods

Almonds

You’re probably aware that drinking a can of Coke or a cup of coffee before bed isn’t good for a teenager’s sleep routine.

But in addition to cutting out caffeine at least six hours before bed, there are sleep-promoting foods you can bring to the kitchen table, which will help your teens’ minds and bodies to relax.

Snacks like magnesium-rich bananas and almonds promote feelings of calmness, and are natural muscle relaxants.

Also, a teaspoon of turmeric mixed with ginger, lemon juice and hot water reduces blood sugar levels. It also helps to prevent sleep disturbances during the night.

For a delicious snack that won’t lead to a sugar rush, try blending a frozen banana with a spoon of almond butter.

In my opinion, this tastes almost as good as ice cream! Plus, it helps you to get a better night’s sleep.

7. Take a holistic approach

If your teens still can’t settle down at night, it may be because of the anxiety that forms such a significant part of the teenage years.

If they’re already worried about not getting enough sleep, your added worrying won’t help the situation.

Try and introduce some calming elements into the evenings.

For example, you can give your teens lavender oil to sprinkle on their pillow (one or two drops is enough), or you can light some incense around the house.

Keep lighting in the house dim after dinner. In addition, if your teens want to listen to music at night, encourage them to listen to soft, relaxing music.

By putting these tips into practice, your teens will find that come bedtime, their mind is already at peace. This will make it more likely that they’ll have a good sleep.

8. Introduce your teens to deep breathing exercises

It’s never too early to start taking care of your physical and mental health.

Help teenagers get enough sleep by enabling them to relax their mind and body before bed.

While many adults today know the benefits of deep breathing exercises, most teens have yet to try them out.

This is unfortunate, because teens will definitely benefit from such deep breathing exercises.

If your teens are sleep deprived, introduce them to deep breathing exercises. These exercises only take a few minutes to do, and can be a useful inclusion in your teens’ pre-bedtime routine.

Try them out for yourself first to see how the exercises enable you to relieve stress and sleep better!

9. Help your teens get as much natural light during the day as possible

Sunlight

Research shows that exposure to natural light during the day leads to more restful sleep at night.

In particular, morning light helps to regulate your circadian rhythm.

By opening the curtains or pulling the blinds during the day, your teens will sleep better at night.

Encourage your teens to get 10 to 15 minutes of direct sunlight each day, because this is especially useful in regulating their biological clock.

As with all things, your teens will take time to adjust to these changes. But if you talk to them about the benefits and implement the changes incrementally, they’ll be more receptive over time.

10. Set an example for your teens

As Mahatma Gandhi once said, “Be the change you want to see in the world.”

This may sound like a cheesy quote to you, but it contains much wisdom.

Do teens need more sleep? Yes, and most likely, so do you.

If you want your teens to develop healthy sleep patterns, you need to set an example.

If you’re staying up until 1 am every day because you’re working your way through the latest Netflix drama, that’s not a good example for your teens.

But if you’re getting to bed at a reasonable hour and rising early, feeling refreshed… your teens will be more likely to follow suit.

You won’t even need to lecture them, because it will be obvious that your habits are helping you to stay in excellent physical health.

Help your teens get enough sleep

Getting enough sleep is important at every stage of life.

No matter our age, sleep affects our mood, relationships and health.

For teenagers, sleep quality and quantity can make puberty either tolerable or unbearable.

I trust that the tips in this article will help both you and your teens to sleep better in the weeks, months and years ahead.

Before long, your teens will take responsibility for their sleep, knowing the measures they ought to take to get the sleep they need.

May your teens – and your whole family – lead healthier and happier lives as a result!

Sarah Cummings is the mum of one very energetic 8-year-old and one fiercely independent teenager. When she has the time to (occasionally) relax, she can be found walking her dog Bones on Venice Beach, listening to Miles Davis on repeat, or napping – she loves her sleep, after all!

(If you haven’t already done so, make sure to download your free e-book below.)

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How to Relieve Stress Before a Test: 25 Research-Backed Tips

Updated on January 6, 2026 By Daniel Wong 47 Comments

Beat exam stress

Does exam stress frequently affect your grades?

If so, you’re in the right place.

In this article, I’ll share with you scientific tips that are proven to help you overcome exam stress.

I guarantee that if you apply the tips, you’ll become a calmer, happier and more successful student.

Let’s get started!

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Stay active and improve your physical health to relieve stress before a test

Physical activity is one of the best, scientifically proven methods to combat stress.

Exercise directly reduces stress hormones, such as adrenaline and cortisol. At the same time, exercise stimulates the production of endorphins, which elevate your mood and are natural painkillers.

In addition, when your physical health improves, you’ll be in a better position to handle stress effectively.

1. Stretch

Everyone knows you should stretch to improve your flexibility, but did you also know that stretching is proven to reduce tension and blood pressure too?[1]

Here’s a practical 15-minute stretching workout to get you started.

2. Take a short walk

WalkTaking a walk has beneficial effects on your stress levels.[2]

Walking gives you time to think, as well as time to get away from studying for a short while.

Going for a walk with your family or friends for 10 or 20 minutes a day is a great way to unwind.

3. Exercise regularly

Research has shown that high-intensity aerobic exercise has positive effects on well-being.[3]

It’s time to get moving!

This doesn’t mean that you have to start training for a marathon, but it does mean that you need to introduce some regular exercise into your life.

Here are some suggestions:

  • Do some form of exercise (jogging, biking, walking, callisthenics) 3 to 5 times a week for 30 minutes each time.
  • Set small – even tiny – daily goals and focus on consistency. Scientific research indicates that frequency is more important than intensity when it comes to forming new habits like exercise.
  • Do exercise that’s enjoyable for you.
  • If you simply don’t find any form of exercise enjoyable, distract yourself with music, audiobooks or podcasts while you’re exercising.
  • Find an “exercise buddy”. It’s easier to stick to a routine when you have an exercise buddy.

4. Get some sunlight every day

A way to increase your serotonin levels is to increase your exposure to sunlight.[4]

Anywhere from 5 to 15 minutes of sunlight per day will help to keep your serotonin levels in the healthy range.

But remember to wear a hat and to apply sunscreen if you’re going to be out in direct sunlight for longer than 15 minutes.

5. Get enough sleep

young man sleepingHitting the books for long hours at a go is tiring, and it’s not a good study habit. When it cuts into your usual hours of sleep, research shows us that stress levels will increase.[5]

Stress and sleep have a two-way relationship. Stress can make it more difficult to fall asleep. It can even lead to sleep disorders.

At the same time, getting a good night’s sleep reduces the effects of stress.

Practise these tips to get a good night’s rest every night:

  • Try to go to sleep and get up at the same time every day. This helps to set your body’s internal clock and optimises the quality of your sleep.
  • Avoid sleeping in, even on weekends. Aim to keep your sleep schedule as regular as possible. If you have a late night, try taking a short nap the following day, rather than sleeping in.
  • Keep your electronic devices out of your bedroom. The blue light emitted by your electronic devices (e.g. phone, tablet, computer, TV) is especially disruptive to sleep.
  • Wind down before you go to bed. Turn off all your devices an hour before it’s time to sleep. Read a book, listen to some calming music, or think of a happy memory.

6. Do deep breathing exercises

Science has proven that deep breathing reduces your cortisol levels.[6]

There are many deep breathing exercises you could try, but here are a couple of them to get you started:

  • Belly breathing: Sit or lie in a comfortable position and place one hand on your belly. Breathe in deeply through your nose, and feel your hand being pushed outwards as the air fills your lungs. Now exhale through your mouth, and feel your hand moving inwards. Repeat 5 to 6 times.
  • Morning breathing: When you get out of bed, stand up straight, bend your knees slightly, and bend forward from the waist. Let your arms hang limply towards the floor. Breathe in slowly, returning to your original standing position as you do. Your head should be the last part of your body to straighten. Exhale slowly, returning to the bent position by the end of your breath. Repeat 5 to 6 times.

7. Get enough vitamin C

kiwiStudies indicate that vitamin C (ascorbic acid) helps to reduce blood pressure and cortisol, which are both signs of stress.[7]

The human body doesn’t produce vitamin C, so it’s vital that you consume plenty of it in your diet.

Here’s a list of fruits and vegetables that are rich in vitamin C:

  • Guava
  • Pepper/capsicum
  • Kiwifruit
  • Strawberries
  • Orange
  • Papaya
  • Broccoli
  • Tomato
  • Kale

8. Reduce your sugar intake

Research shows that when you’re stressed, your adrenal glands release cortisol – a stress hormone – to manage it.[8]

But cortisol also affects your blood sugar level. So, the more your sugar intake spikes, the more stressed you’ll feel.

Did you know that what happens in the morning has more effect on how your body manages stress than at any other time?

This is because your body sets its blood sugar “clock” based on what you do after you wake up.

Here are some practical tips to help you reduce your sugar intake and maintain a healthy diet:

Don’t:

  • Skip breakfast.
  • Eat sugary cereals or candy.
  • Drink sugary drinks.

Do:

  • Eat a high-protein breakfast. Include eggs, peanut butter, oats or nuts.
  • Eat 4 to 5 servings of fruits and vegetables a day.
  • Eat more fish, e.g. salmon, trout.

Organisational tips to prevent stress before a test

Strong organisational skills and focus will help you schedule time to study for an exam well in advance.

Starting too late and cramming in too much information before an exam is a common cause of anxiety. So, take that pressure off of yourself and turn stressful exams into… just exams without the stress.

9. Clear your room and your desk

Have you heard the saying “A cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind”?

It turns out it’s not just something your mother says to get you to clean your room. It’s scientifically correct.[9]

The more clutter you have around your workspace, the less you’re able to concentrate on preparing for the exam. This is because your brain is being bombarded by so many distractions.

Physical clutter overloads your brain and impairs your ability to think, which leads to stress.

So you need to clear your desk and your room. Do the following to get organised:

  • Reduce as much clutter as you can around your workspace. Get rid of anything that doesn’t need to be there, e.g. photos, snacks, staplers. Move them out of sight, or out of your room completely.
  • Use drawers. Store things away in your drawers or wardrobe. The only things you should have on your desk are the tools and books you need to complete your current assignment.
  • Clean your space. Now that you’ve cleared your space, give your desk and room a good clean.
  • Straighten up before you go. Take 5 minutes at the end of the day to clear everything away, so you can start again tomorrow with an uncluttered desk and an uncluttered mind.

10. Learn and apply time management techniques

A study involving students revealed that those who had been taught time management techniques showed lower levels of exam-related anxiety than those who had not.[10]

Effective time management includes getting enough rest and a good night’s sleep, which leaves you feeling more energised so that you’re able to focus when studying.

Managing your time well helps you to avoid feeling overwhelmed, so you’ll be less stressed.

Here are just a few of the many time management techniques I used to become a straight-A student, while still getting 8 hours of sleep a night:

  • Take a break after studying for 40 to 50 minutes. For most students, working in blocks of 40 to 50 minutes helps them to be as productive as possible.
  • Complete assignments at least one to two days before they’re due. By doing this, you’ll have time to check through your work thoroughly.
  • Block out time for studying. Put it in your calendar and treat it as if it’s a fixed appointment.

11. Don’t multitask

multitaskMultitasking is bad for your health.[11] It increases your heart rate and blood pressure, and causes stress.

Doing several tasks at once may seem like an efficient use of your time, but multitasking actually wastes time and reduces the quality of your work.

Here’s how to avoid multitasking:

  • Get rid of all distractions before you start work (see Tip #1).
  • Close all the unused tabs in your browser, and minimise all other windows on your computer screen.
  • Make a list of all the tasks you need to complete for the day; work through the list one item at a time.
  • Set a realistic deadline for every task on the list.

12. Reduce your phone usage

Who would have thought your mobile phone could cause stress?

Research shows that overuse of mobile phones not only causes stress, but can also have a negative impact on your mental health.[12]

So it’s time to get smart about your smartphone.

Here are a few things you could try:

  • Check your social media feeds just once or twice a day.
  • Turn off all notifications.
  • Put your phone on airplane mode, or better still, switch it off after 9pm.

If you’re still struggling, there are fun apps designed to help you ignore your mobile phone and focus on studying for your exams, such as Forest.

When you want to concentrate, you can plant a seed in Forest, which will take 30 minutes to grow. But if you get distracted and leave the app, your tree will wither and die.

Stimulate your senses and de-stress before a test

If you know you typically get stressed before an exam, try sensory stimulation. These activities can help you get out of your head and into your body.

If you try any of these tips while taking a study break, be sure to get back to work soon. Otherwise, you’ll just be procrastinating and you’ll be even more stressed afterwards.

13. Sing your heart out

teen singing while readingResearchers have discovered that singing can soothe your tension and elevate your spirits. This reduces the effects of stress.[13]

When you sing, you release endorphins, which are associated with feelings of pleasure.

And the more you sing, the more you increase your endorphins and lower your levels of cortisol.

So if you’re trying to beat exam stress, sing your heart out when you’re taking a break!

14. Read something for leisure

It’s proven that reading for pleasure can reduce stress by up to 68%.[14]

Reading relaxes your body by lowering your heart rate and easing the tension in your muscles.

So the next time you feel the tension rise at the thought of an impending exam, pick up a good book and give yourself a 10-minute reading break.

15. Try aromatherapy

Research has shown that aromatherapy has the power to evoke emotions and memories and can impact your body through your nervous system.[15]

This makes aromatherapy an effective tool to help you deal with exam stress.

Here are 6 scents or oils to help you relieve stress and improve your sleep quality:

  • Lavender
  • Lemon
  • Bergamot
  • Ylang ylang
  • Clary sage
  • Jasmine

Various studies have shown that these aromatherapy oils can lower your blood pressure, heart rate, and even skin temperature, as well as soothe anxiety by calming the nervous system.

16. Drink tea

A study has found that black tea has health benefits linked to stress relief.[16]

Other teas that anecdotally aid stress relief are peppermint tea, because it’s a natural muscle relaxant; chamomile tea, which helps insomnia and reduces irritability; and lemon balm tea, which reduces cortisol and improves sleep.

Enjoy a soothing cup of tea every day, and it will help you to prepare more effectively for your exams.

17. Eat dark chocolate

Dark chocolateResearch has shown that eating a small amount of dark chocolate every day reduces stress hormone levels.[17]

This is great news for chocolate lovers!

But remember, the chocolate must be dark (with 70% or more cocoa).

In addition, dark chocolate is a calorie-dense food, so it’s not recommended that you eat more than 40g to 60g a day.

Strengthen your mental endurance ahead of stressful exams

School and life can get stressful at times.

The situation isn’t always going to be within your control, but you can control how you react to and deal with stress.

Before a stressful situation comes up, you can work on building your mental endurance to become more confident and resilient.

18. Practise mindfulness

Mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR) is scientifically proven to be an effective treatment for reducing stress.[18]

Although it was initially created to help hospital patients, MBSR is now used by a broad range of people, including students.

Mindfulness is the practice of being aware of your mind and body.

For example, to practise mindfulness, close your eyes and focus entirely on your breathing. Be aware of every breath and “follow” the air as it goes from your lungs and out through your nose.

You can also try lying with your back on the floor while keeping your eyes closed. “Move” your focus through your body, focusing on one area at a time.

You don’t have to be sitting or lying down to practise mindfulness. You can do it while you’re walking.

Focus on the sensations in your body as you walk. Notice the feeling in your feet as they touch the ground, and the movement of your hips with each step.

The more you practise mindfulness, the more fully present you’ll be wherever you are, and the less stressed you’ll be.

19. Listen to quiet, calming music

I’ve already mentioned that singing can help to reduce exam stress, but so can listening to music – especially slow, soothing classical music, like this.

The comforting power of music is well established, which makes music an effective stress management tool.[19]

Listening to music has a relaxing effect on our minds and bodies, slowing our pulse, lowering our blood pressure, and decreasing our levels of stress hormones.

So set aside 10 minutes a day to tune in to some classical music and tune out your exam stress.

20. Write down the things you’re worried about

Write downIt’s been proven that if you take a few moments to write about your fears just before you take an exam, it will help to reduce your anxiety and improve your grades.[20]

In the experiment, students were asked to complete a brief expressive writing assignment right before taking a test.

The results showed that doing the writing assignment significantly improved the students’ exam scores, especially those who were habitually anxious about taking tests.

Just writing about your worries before an exam can boost your grades – so do this before your next exam!

21. Think of a happy memory

Research suggests that the natural chemical, serotonin, creates a sense of well-being and helps your brain to function at peak capacity.[21]

One way to produce more serotonin is to think positive thoughts.

How?

Start by thinking about a happy memory – something that makes you smile. Think of it as your happy place and go there in your mind as often as possible.

When you feel stressed, think about your favourite memory from your childhood, or about something you did as a family recently that was fun.

22. Write down 3 things you’re thankful for

I’m sure you’re grateful for many things in your life.

Maybe you’re grateful for a loving family or loyal friends. Or maybe you’re just grateful you passed your last math exam.

But perhaps you don’t express that gratitude often.

Did you know that if you write down all the things you’re grateful for, your health will improve?

Studies have found that expressing gratitude can lower your blood pressure, improve your sleep and boost your immune system.[22]

So when you’re taking a break from studying, why not write down 3 things you’re grateful for?

It could be something you take for granted, like the invention of the Internet (I’m extremely thankful for that!), or something like the fact that you get to attend school.

Your body and mind will thank you for cultivating a habit of gratitude.

23. Use positive affirmations

thumbs upRepeating positive affirmations is a powerful way to calm yourself down and banish those exam butterflies.

In fact, research has shown that positive affirmations can help reduce exam stress by reducing adrenalin levels.[23]

Here are some positive affirmations you can try the next time you feel those stress levels rising. Repeat them out loud to yourself several times a day:

  • I’m becoming more focused.
  • I’m continuing to work hard.
  • I’m getting better at taking exams.
  • I’m enjoying the process of learning.
  • I’m motivated to prepare well for this exam.
  • I’m going to perform well on this exam.
  • Learning is meaningful and fun.
  • I’m developing self-discipline.
  • I love the challenge of taking exams.

24. Focus on progress, not perfection

Do you sometimes feel as if you’re not good enough? Do you think that you’ll never be able to achieve the goals you’ve set for yourself?

If so, you may be a perfectionist.

This is another way of saying you’re too hard on yourself, which means that you need to focus on the progress you’re making instead of your perceived failures.[24]

Being a perfectionist may sound ideal, but it often causes undue stress.

These are some ways to deal with it:

  • Set realistic goals instead of trying to achieve the impossible.
  • Celebrate small and big successes.
  • Make sure you take time out from studying to do things you enjoy.
  • Invest in the relationships that matter the most to you.
  • Find ways to contribute at home and at school, because this will shift your focus toward the needs of others.
  • Learn to use words like “acceptable” and “good”, because if you always aim for “perfection”, you may not even make progress.

25. Be kind to yourself

being kind to yourselfIt’s easy to become anxious when all you can focus on is the fear of failing the exam.

Stress weaves its way into your life when you’re too hard on yourself. So ease up and give yourself a break. It’s time to practise self-compassion.

Research indicates that self-compassion reduces your stress levels and improves your sense of well-being.[25]

These are some ways to practise self-compassion:

  • At the end of each day, write down 3 of your achievements. It doesn’t matter how big or small these achievements are, e.g. completing your math assignment, reading a chapter of your history textbook. What matters is that you acknowledge these achievements.
  • Talk to yourself kindly. Speak to yourself as if you’re your own best friend.
  • Do something fun every day. Life doesn’t have to be serious all the time.
  • Set realistic goals. Don’t set yourself up for failure by setting impossible targets.

Conclusion

These are the 25 tips backed by research, which will enable you to beat exam stress.

Now it’s over to you…

Do you use any techniques to overcome exam stress that aren’t listed in this article?

Or maybe you have a question you’d like to ask.

Let me know by leaving a comment below!

(If you haven’t already done so, make sure to download your free quick action guide below.)

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